You know you have a dog when...
Discussion
GliderRider said:
...when you've finished doing a number two, he gets up from sitting in your underpants, because doing that keeps his back paws off the ground to stop them getting chilled on the tiled floor. You look down, see a skid mark in your Y-fronts, but don't know if its his or yours...
Can honestly say never that. Ewwww.FiF said:
When you try and sneak a digestive from the biscuit tin and no matter how quiet you are and no matter how deeply asleep you think he is the door into the kitchen still gets head butted open.
Same for cream crackers and cheese, ditto sausage roll, etc etc.
And that moment you open the fridge, ever so quietly- thinking that you've managed it- and in a flash, comes "dog of your life". And that moment ,when aftr all the coaxing into the back of the car, you give up and lift them in. To be greeted ,after clipping on the harness with that look" where is my treat?". Same for cream crackers and cheese, ditto sausage roll, etc etc.
Today, realise there's a significant bit of anthropomorphising here, but this morning put on some trousers that I hadn't worn since the summer.
Idly fishing around in one of the pockets I found the wooden stick from a Magnum choc ice stored there months ago with the intention at the time of sticking it in a bin at the first opportunity.
Holding the stick and heading towards the kitchen bin realised that I was subject to an intense accusatory stare as someone strongly suspected he'd been denied the last licks of an ice cream.
Idly fishing around in one of the pockets I found the wooden stick from a Magnum choc ice stored there months ago with the intention at the time of sticking it in a bin at the first opportunity.
Holding the stick and heading towards the kitchen bin realised that I was subject to an intense accusatory stare as someone strongly suspected he'd been denied the last licks of an ice cream.
FiF said:
I was subject to an intense accusatory stare as someone strongly suspected he'd been denied the last licks of an ice cream.
:-)Definitely remembering I am a dog owner, when traveling all over the place I find myself pulling (clean) poo bags out of every fleece and jacket I packed with me.
FiF said:
When you try and sneak a digestive from the biscuit tin and no matter how quiet you are and no matter how deeply asleep you think he is the door into the kitchen still gets head butted open.
Same for cream crackers and cheese, ditto sausage roll, etc etc.
Especially cheese... how on earth can they identify the sound of a packet of cheese being opened, yet ignore it when you're opening various other packets in the kitchen.Same for cream crackers and cheese, ditto sausage roll, etc etc.
When you come in at all sorts of weird and wonderful hours from work, and yet the house remains silent as Mutley is upstairs, sound asleep next to swmbo.
BUT
Once a month I may roll in at a stupid hour on a Saturday morning from a poker game with friends, and despite my best efforts of entering in stealth mode, all of a sudden Mutley, (Steve) has now become a fully trained attack dog just as the key goes into the door.
BUT
Once a month I may roll in at a stupid hour on a Saturday morning from a poker game with friends, and despite my best efforts of entering in stealth mode, all of a sudden Mutley, (Steve) has now become a fully trained attack dog just as the key goes into the door.
Starfighter said:
You get stopped by the sniffer dog at the airport for a pocket full of treats.
I don't know if you jest or have experienced this.But many years ago at Liverpool the armed unit had a springer who was all over my case.... I could see the bloke on my right tensing and the chap with the dog was being cautious. Then I opened my case and showed him my tuna sandwich that was parked on my law books...... The dog's tail was wagging furiously..... The look on the copper's face was hilarious..... I did tell him never mind my dogs would have been worse, but that didn't seem to make him feel better......
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