Sean Connery Joke Thread (Vol 7)
Discussion
There's a cartoon, I think in the Gruaniad. The gist:
Arriving in hell, the coffin slowly creaks open. The incumbent slowly rises to look around at the hot dark chamber with a phalanx of be-forked demons and the hordes of sinners all filthy, hot and in fear.
"Why isn't this mine closed????" bellows Lady Thatcher.
Arriving in hell, the coffin slowly creaks open. The incumbent slowly rises to look around at the hot dark chamber with a phalanx of be-forked demons and the hordes of sinners all filthy, hot and in fear.
"Why isn't this mine closed????" bellows Lady Thatcher.
mattdaniels said:
Snowboy said:
As far as I know, was never implicated in sleaz or curruption.
You should aquaint yourself with something called "The Hillsborough Disaster" then.Back on topic, apparently her final wish was to be cremated. Unfortunately there isn't any coal left.
James P said:
mattdaniels said:
Snowboy said:
As far as I know, was never implicated in sleaz or curruption.
You should aquaint yourself with something called "The Hillsborough Disaster" then.Back on topic, apparently her final wish was to be cremated. Unfortunately there isn't any coal left.
Little Johnny goes to school, and the teacher says, 'Today we are going to learn multi-syllable words, class. Does anybody have an example of a multi-syllable word?'
Little Johnny waves his hand, 'Me, Miss Rogers, me, me!'
Miss Rogers:'All right, little Johnny, what is your multi-syllable word?'
Little Johnny says, 'Mas-tur-bate.'
Miss Rogers smiles and says, 'Wow, little Johnny, that's a mouthful.'
Little Johnny says, 'No, Miss Rogers, you're thinking of a blowjob".
Little Johnny waves his hand, 'Me, Miss Rogers, me, me!'
Miss Rogers:'All right, little Johnny, what is your multi-syllable word?'
Little Johnny says, 'Mas-tur-bate.'
Miss Rogers smiles and says, 'Wow, little Johnny, that's a mouthful.'
Little Johnny says, 'No, Miss Rogers, you're thinking of a blowjob".
HereBeMonsters said:
James P said:
mattdaniels said:
Snowboy said:
As far as I know, was never implicated in sleaz or curruption.
You should aquaint yourself with something called "The Hillsborough Disaster" then.Back on topic, apparently her final wish was to be cremated. Unfortunately there isn't any coal left.
Things were not going to well in the bedroom and so the wife decided to have a long talk with her husband about what he wanted and how they could improve things.
Then she had a long think about how she could satisfy her husband in bed. Finally she hit on an idea and spent sometime shopping on 'specialist' websites.
That night her husband gets home and hears a sultry voice calling, "Upstairs, darling!" He opens the bedroom door and there is his wife. She is on the bed, naked, on all fours, legs akimbo. She has an antique brass bicycle pump stuck up her arse, old penny-farthing wheels hanging from her tits and is ringing an old-fashioned bicycle bell.
He husband looks at her for a moment, rolls his eyes and says, "Bi-curious! I said bi-curious!"
Then she had a long think about how she could satisfy her husband in bed. Finally she hit on an idea and spent sometime shopping on 'specialist' websites.
That night her husband gets home and hears a sultry voice calling, "Upstairs, darling!" He opens the bedroom door and there is his wife. She is on the bed, naked, on all fours, legs akimbo. She has an antique brass bicycle pump stuck up her arse, old penny-farthing wheels hanging from her tits and is ringing an old-fashioned bicycle bell.
He husband looks at her for a moment, rolls his eyes and says, "Bi-curious! I said bi-curious!"
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