Things that annoy you beyond reason...(Vol. 7)

[Tom8]

Chicken_Satay said:

International Womens Day: it's just another meaningless day that allows woke virtue signallers to do yet more virtue signalling, this time around women.

Who the hell creates these days and who approves them? Then you have weeks and months for some other virtue signalling. Is there a calendar I can check so I can arrange white straight blokes who like food and pints day? Or maybe we should have a month of that?

At work when the queen died we went to hang a union flag at half mast. When we looked we had hundreds of flags for disability, lesbians, cyclists etc but did not actually own union flag. How low we have sunk.

[r3g]

captain_cynic said:

People who just leave their trays at the end of the X-ray at the airport security checkpoint so that other trays can't move down until someone else stacks them.

I think the death penalty is too good for these miscreants.

On the plus side, train to airside at Gatwick in less than 30 mins. Including checking a bag.

However my flights been delayed meaning I'm perilously close to the MCT at MAD.

Edited by captain_cynic on Thursday 9th March 08:45

Posts like this annoy me. I am au fait with airport codes having worked in aviation, but why write "Gatwick" then use the airport codes for Muscat (MCT) and Madrid (MAD) - which no-one else would understand anyway? Why not Gatwick, Muscat and Madrid or LGW, MCT and MAD ?

[RizzoTheRat]

nicanary said:

shih tzu faced said:

Hellman’s mayonnaise squeezy plastic bottles. Those stupid upside down ones. Absolute crap, I fking hate them.

Won’t go into detail with all the reasons as it’ll take too long and I’ll end up smashing my phone with a lump hammer. Really shouldn’t be that difficult to make make a tuna mayo sandwich ffs.

Do these herberts ever test their own products? Sort it out you useless s.

It IS a superior mayo and I prefer to buy it rather than generic supermarket carp, but the bottles are a nightmare. When they're down to about one-third full the plastic is too hard to squeeze effectively and nothing will come out. I have to bin it and buy another.

And the shape of the bottle means you can't even get a knife or a spoon in to scrape out the last of it.

However one other thing that annoys me beyond reason, Mayo is a county in Ireland or some nasty American contraction of a real word. I put mayonnaise in my sandwiches.

[captain_cynic]

r3g said:

captain_cynic said:

People who just leave their trays at the end of the X-ray at the airport security checkpoint so that other trays can't move down until someone else stacks them.

I think the death penalty is too good for these miscreants.

On the plus side, train to airside at Gatwick in less than 30 mins. Including checking a bag.

However my flights been delayed meaning I'm perilously close to the MCT at MAD.

Edited by captain_cynic on Thursday 9th March 08:45

Posts like this annoy me. I am au fait with airport codes having worked in aviation, but why write "Gatwick" then use the airport codes for Muscat (MCT) and Madrid (MAD) - which no-one else would understand anyway? Why not Gatwick, Muscat and Madrid or LGW, MCT and MAD ?

Hook, line and sinker.

I knew I'd get someone. yes I know I'm an SOB.

MCT in this context is Minimum Connection Time. The minimum amount of time I need to get my arse from the gate I arrive at to the gate I leave from.

However I've just found out my flight out of Madrid has been delayed too. Small mercies for a bloke who got 1 hour is sleep last night.

FTR (For The Record) I work in an industry with a lot of specialised acronyms and contractions. I believe that explaining them in simple terms is an important part of communicating with clients.

[SteveStrange]

r3g said:

Posts like this annoy me. I am au fait with airport codes having worked in aviation, but why write "Gatwick" then use the airport codes for Muscat (MCT) and Madrid (MAD) - which no-one else would understand anyway? Why not Gatwick, Muscat and Madrid or LGW, MCT and MAD ?

Because they (want you to know that they) travel so often that are as fluent in English as they are in IATA codes. They think it sounds cool, but in reality it just advertises to people that they're the sad individuals you see in cheap suits sitting at a crap breakfast cafe at 5.30am in airports, desperate to gain enough loyalty points to get access to a "premium" lounge, with 4 hour old food in warming cabinets, lukewarm coffee, and little packs of free biscuits, whilst waiting for the inevitable "flight delayed" announcement. (Having also worked at an international airport for a few years, I can say with some certainty that these people are pitied by the staff, rather than envied - and even the pilots don't speak in IATA outside of the cockpit).

RIP the cringe thread.

[captain_cynic]

SteveStrange said:

r3g said:

Posts like this annoy me. I am au fait with airport codes having worked in aviation, but why write "Gatwick" then use the airport codes for Muscat (MCT) and Madrid (MAD) - which no-one else would understand anyway? Why not Gatwick, Muscat and Madrid or LGW, MCT and MAD ?

Because they (want you to know that they) travel so often that are as fluent in English as they are in IATA codes. They think it sounds cool, but in reality it just advertises to people that they're the sad individuals you see in cheap suits sitting at a crap breakfast cafe at 5.30am in airports, desperate to gain enough loyalty points to get access to a "premium" lounge, with 4 hour old food in warming cabinets, lukewarm coffee, and little packs of free biscuits, whilst waiting for the inevitable "flight delayed" announcement. (Having also worked at an international airport for a few years, I can say with some certainty that these people are pitied by the staff, rather than envied - and even the pilots don't speak in IATA outside of the cockpit).

RIP the cringe thread.

LoL, now writing all that out is sad.

Basically youve told us two things.

1. You're upset that everyone does not speak like you.
2. You clearly don't know any pilots.

Like most professions they have a lingo all of their own. However when it comes to using IATA (or ICAO) codes they, like most people use what feels natural. It's easier to say Gatwick than "El Gee Double U" but easier to say mad than Madrid.

Language pedants are always keen to show how ignorant they are of the language.

[Doofus]

RizzoTheRat said:

nicanary said:

shih tzu faced said:

Hellman’s mayonnaise squeezy plastic bottles. Those stupid upside down ones. Absolute crap, I fking hate them.

Won’t go into detail with all the reasons as it’ll take too long and I’ll end up smashing my phone with a lump hammer. Really shouldn’t be that difficult to make make a tuna mayo sandwich ffs.

Do these herberts ever test their own products? Sort it out you useless s.

It IS a superior mayo and I prefer to buy it rather than generic supermarket carp, but the bottles are a nightmare. When they're down to about one-third full the plastic is too hard to squeeze effectively and nothing will come out. I have to bin it and buy another.

And the shape of the bottle means you can't even get a knife or a spoon in to scrape out the last of it.

Just cut the bottom off.

[captain_cynic]

Apparently there is an issue with low visibility at Gatwick this morning.

The airline has just asked for people to board as efficiently as possible to minimise turnaround, if there is one place where people are unable to follow basic instructions or lack basic common sense it's in an airport.

[colonel c]

Being told that there is 'lots of helpful information available on our website' every few seconds while waiting and waiting on hold for HMRC to answer. If the one piece of info I needed were on the website I would not be sitting here for 40 minutes (so far).

[Cliftonite]

Doofus said:

RizzoTheRat said:

nicanary said:

shih tzu faced said:

Hellman’s mayonnaise squeezy plastic bottles. Those stupid upside down ones. Absolute crap, I fking hate them.

Won’t go into detail with all the reasons as it’ll take too long and I’ll end up smashing my phone with a lump hammer. Really shouldn’t be that difficult to make make a tuna mayo sandwich ffs.

Do these herberts ever test their own products? Sort it out you useless s.

It IS a superior mayo and I prefer to buy it rather than generic supermarket carp, but the bottles are a nightmare. When they're down to about one-third full the plastic is too hard to squeeze effectively and nothing will come out. I have to bin it and buy another.

And the shape of the bottle means you can't even get a knife or a spoon in to scrape out the last of it.

Just cut the bottom off.

Or warm it under a hot tap or in the microwave?

Getting customers to buy 50% more of your product than they actually use is marketing genius? On a par with the story of Colman's fortune being made from the wasted mustard left on the side of the plate?

[RizzoTheRat]

Warm mayonnaise?

[boyse7en]

Annoyed beyond reason that my phone won't allow voice control ("Hey Google") until it has been unlocked, which requires me to touch the fingerprint recognition button.
Surely the point of having voice control is so that you don't need to touch the phone? I have to pick the blooming thing up, i might as well give up on the voice control and just use the touchscreen as normal.

[ro250]

No doubt it's been covered elsewhere, but why are so many people using the phrase, "to be fair" these days?

Normally closely followed by the equally pointless, "I'm not going to lie".

[Voldemort]

boyse7en said:

Annoyed beyond reason that my phone won't allow voice control ("Hey Google") until it has been unlocked, which requires me to touch the fingerprint recognition button.
Surely the point of having voice control is so that you don't need to touch the phone? I have to pick the blooming thing up, i might as well give up on the voice control and just use the touchscreen as normal.

Is this some 3rd world android problem that us apple users don't know about?

[ro250]

Voldemort said:

boyse7en said:

Annoyed beyond reason that my phone won't allow voice control ("Hey Google") until it has been unlocked, which requires me to touch the fingerprint recognition button.
Surely the point of having voice control is so that you don't need to touch the phone? I have to pick the blooming thing up, i might as well give up on the voice control and just use the touchscreen as normal.

Is this some 3rd world android problem that us apple users don't know about?

Go into your settings on the phone (click your Google icon) > select Lock Screen > there you can set whether the Assistant works when phone is locked.

[yellowjack]

Doofus said:

RizzoTheRat said:

nicanary said:

shih tzu faced said:

Hellman’s mayonnaise squeezy plastic bottles. Those stupid upside down ones. Absolute crap, I fking hate them.

Won’t go into detail with all the reasons as it’ll take too long and I’ll end up smashing my phone with a lump hammer. Really shouldn’t be that difficult to make make a tuna mayo sandwich ffs.

Do these herberts ever test their own products? Sort it out you useless s.

It IS a superior mayo and I prefer to buy it rather than generic supermarket carp, but the bottles are a nightmare. When they're down to about one-third full the plastic is too hard to squeeze effectively and nothing will come out. I have to bin it and buy another.

And the shape of the bottle means you can't even get a knife or a spoon in to scrape out the last of it.

Just cut the bottom off.

Now here's a few alternative suggestions that don't risk bodily injury with knives/scissors...

1. Buy your Hellmann's mayonnaise in a glass jar and serve it with a spoon.
2. Buy a smaller spoon which will fit through the neck in order to scrape more of it out.
3. Develop your "flick technique", or bang the bottle really hard onto something like a breadboard to get as much of the contents as possible down to the neck. This also helps minimise "mayo bottle fart" issues.
4. Mayonnaise is so thick you'll never get all of it out by squeezing or scraping, so some loss is inevitable. BUT. If you're the last one to use the bottle, what harm could it possibly do to hook a finger (you've obviously washed your hands before preparing food, right?) into the bottle to scoop out the last of the mayonnaise. I mean, who is going to complain if the plastic bottle is going in the bin, or being washed for the recycling after you've finished with it.
5. Buy another bottle of mayonnaise, open it and use some, then stick it at the back of the fridge/cupboard and leave scraping the last of the mayo out of the old bottle to someone who can be bothered (not available to me as I'm the only mayonnaise consumer in my house).
6. Play to PistonHeads stereotype, dismiss ANY commercially bought mayonnaise as "terribly council, old boy", and instruct "the staff" to whip up some fresh mayonnaise, while you "shoot your cuff" for a "wrist check" and upload a photograph of a crashingly vulgar/aesthetically hideous timepiece (with obligatory supercar steering wheel in the background) to a social media photo sharing website.
7. Switch to Salad Cream. It's runnier, so no need for the pesky scraping.

[r3g]

SteveStrange said:

r3g said:

Posts like this annoy me. I am au fait with airport codes having worked in aviation, but why write "Gatwick" then use the airport codes for Muscat (MCT) and Madrid (MAD) - which no-one else would understand anyway? Why not Gatwick, Muscat and Madrid or LGW, MCT and MAD ?

Because they (want you to know that they) travel so often that are as fluent in English as they are in IATA codes. They think it sounds cool, but in reality it just advertises to people that they're the sad individuals you see in cheap suits sitting at a crap breakfast cafe at 5.30am in airports, desperate to gain enough loyalty points to get access to a "premium" lounge, with 4 hour old food in warming cabinets, lukewarm coffee, and little packs of free biscuits, whilst waiting for the inevitable "flight delayed" announcement. (Having also worked at an international airport for a few years, I can say with some certainty that these people are pitied by the staff, rather than envied - and even the pilots don't speak in IATA outside of the cockpit).

RIP the cringe thread.

Ackkktually... they are ICAO codes not IATA and I may have been guilty of writing PVR and CUN (for Puerto Vallarta and Cancun) in one of my posts on here in the past so..

[r3g]

colonel c said:

Being told that there is 'lots of helpful information available on our website' every few seconds while waiting and waiting on hold for HMRC to answer. If the one piece of info I needed were on the website I would not be sitting here for 40 minutes (so far).

This is especially annoying when you're on hold for VirginMedia, BT etc, because your internet is down and they are merrily telling you that you could save time by visiting their website where you'll find all the answers to your problems......

[RizzoTheRat]

yellowjack said:

1. Buy your Hellmann's mayonnaise in a glass jar and serve it with a spoon.
2. Buy a smaller spoon which will fit through the neck in order to scrape more of it out.
<snip>
7. Switch to Salad Cream. It's runnier, so no need for the pesky scraping.

I'm in the 1 camp myself, 2 is a non starter unless you have as spoon with the head at right angles to the shaft as the shoulder is too wide and the neck of the bottle too narrow to get in there.

As for 7, anyone advocating such a thing clearly has no functioning taste buds so thier views on anything food related should ignored.

[Zumbruk]

nicanary said:

shih tzu faced said:

Hellman’s mayonnaise squeezy plastic bottles. Those stupid upside down ones. Absolute crap, I fking hate them.

Won’t go into detail with all the reasons as it’ll take too long and I’ll end up smashing my phone with a lump hammer. Really shouldn’t be that difficult to make make a tuna mayo sandwich ffs.

Do these herberts ever test their own products? Sort it out you useless s.

It IS a superior mayo and I prefer to buy it rather than generic supermarket carp, but the bottles are a nightmare. When they're down to about one-third full the plastic is too hard to squeeze effectively and nothing will come out. I have to bin it and buy another.

Unscrew the cap and dob it out through the 1cm bottle neck. Works a treat.

But I still haven't worked out how to get the last tbsp out.