Classic from the Mrs! Vol 2

[Robbo 27]

She was talking about how lucky some kids were, she said:

'They don't know when they were born'.

[Don1]

"Don't shoot your chickens before they hatch".

God I love her!

[Vipers]

We bought some pre packed cod with peas in Sainsbugs yesterday.

She says the one I picked up is off, Why I said, she said "its all green inside".

Yes dear they are called peas............................................

Edited by Vipers on Monday 23 May 22:19

[Moonhawk]

IanUAE said:

Apparently we are going to going to something that will kill 2 stones with 1 bird this week. I wasn't really paying attention to the rest of the conversation...

She's been reading Chuck Norris facts

[Blown2CV]

Found out that Deutsche Bahn are planning trains from London to Germany, which is pretty cool, and Mrs 2CV teaches German so I told her. She responds with "are they using the tunnel?". After I stopped laughing she the comes out with "well I suppose they won't have to dig much further." Eh? Turns out she thought the tunnel currently went all the way to Paris (not just under the watery bit) and therefore to get to Hamburg they'd have to dig a tunnel all the way there!! I mean wow.

[j4ckos mate]

Came in last night after doing the garden
She's not been well in bed watching the tv
The Karen carpenter story was on so I said
'How longs this been on?'
She replied with 'it's only just begun'

[vanordinaire]

A few years ago we were at the Tour of Mull rally. After the rally, I was speaking to the local winner, Neil Mackinnon. My wife, wanting to show off her extensive knowledge of world rallying asked if he was related to Tommy Mackinnon. It took us a wee while to realise she was referring to Tommi Makinen, the Finnish world champion at the time.

[21TonyK]

Set the scene...

I'm away on a rugby tour with my son and his team. Mrs 21 and daughter head off for the weekend taking my car. 30-40 miles in low oil light comes on. No panics, tops up with a litre enroute. Drives another 100+ miles, has a great weekend shopping then drives 150 miles home.

I get back to be told my car "doesn't sound right". I go out and start it, sounds like its running on a few cylinders less than it should with emissions light on.

Lift he bonnet to find oil filler not done up

Thanks... use your own car next time.

[Blown2CV]

21TonyK said:

Set the scene...

I'm away on a rugby tour with my son and his team. Mrs 21 and daughter head off for the weekend taking my car. 30-40 miles in low oil light comes on. No panics, tops up with a litre enroute. Drives another 100+ miles, has a great weekend shopping then drives 150 miles home.

I get back to be told my car "doesn't sound right". I go out and start it, sounds like its running on a few cylinders less than it should with emissions light on.

Lift he bonnet to find oil filler not done up

Thanks... use your own car next time.

why would not having the filler tightened cause engine fkage?

[HRL]

All the oil had pissed out?

[Warmfuzzies]

Blown2CV said:

21TonyK said:

Set the scene...

I'm away on a rugby tour with my son and his team. Mrs 21 and daughter head off for the weekend taking my car. 30-40 miles in low oil light comes on. No panics, tops up with a litre enroute. Drives another 100+ miles, has a great weekend shopping then drives 150 miles home.

I get back to be told my car "doesn't sound right". I go out and start it, sounds like its running on a few cylinders less than it should with emissions light on.

Lift he bonnet to find oil filler not done up

Thanks... use your own car next time.

why would not having the filler tightened cause engine fkage?

A ford Orion 1.6D takes 60 miles to empty the sump like this, ask me how I know.....

[Blown2CV]

HRL said:

All the oil had pissed out?

I've never done that so I wouldn't know. Would it actually squirt upwards?!

[mollytherocker]

Blown2CV said:

I've never done that so I wouldn't know. Would it actually squirt upwards?!

It depends on the specific engine, but oil is thrown around the top of head at a fair old pressure. It would certainly squirt out and eventually empty the engine.

[grumpy52]

My niece getting on a coach to go to the Derby this morning says to one and all "it's so sad that Nelson Mandela has died "

[mollytherocker]

grumpy52 said:

My niece getting on a coach to go to the Derby this morning says to one and all "it's so sad that Nelson Mandela has died "

Absolute gold!

[jbudgie]

j4ckos mate said:

Came in last night after doing the garden
She's not been well in bed watching the tv
The Karen carpenter story was on so I said
'How longs this been on?'
She replied with 'it's only just begun'

[anonymous-user]

Blown2CV said:

I've never done that so I wouldn't know. Would it actually squirt upwards?!

Yup, take the oil cap off after you go out for a drive, underside of cap will be covered in oil, well it is on mine

[HRL]

Me neither but I've seen the aftermath of someone else's car who'd left the cap off.

The entire engine bay was wearing the oil instead of it lubricating where it should.

[davhill]

HRL said:

Me neither but I've seen the aftermath of someone else's car who'd left the cap off.

The entire engine bay was wearing the oil instead of it lubricating where it should.

I got called in to sort out a Pajero (grey import Shogun) whose oil filter had vibrated loose on the road. The oil contamination (diesel car) started under bonnet and finished as far up as the trailing edge of the roof. That's a car that'll never rust!

[Evangelion]

I once topped up a Capri with oil in Bristol, then drove it to Reading on the M4. As I came off the motorway I could smell oil so stopped as soon as I could. The underside of the bonnet lid was covered in it, as was much of the engine bay. Shame the car was white!

(Well it had been white up till then.)