Most ridiculous/bizarre accusations

Most ridiculous/bizarre accusations

Author
Discussion

McHaggis

50,789 posts

156 months

Tuesday 19th June 2012
quotequote all
captainzep said:
Those are rather limiting criteria aren't they?

I could be in a solid and erotically charged relationship with a woman who happened to have dementia couldn't I? -But she might need reminding of my name from time to time?
I know, I tend to set the bar high. wink

DrTre

12,955 posts

233 months

Tuesday 19th June 2012
quotequote all
Prefer to think of myself as a sexual tigger.
Bounce around enthusiastically and am generally pretty amazing, including never getting lost in 'hundred acre wood'

JonRB

74,884 posts

273 months

Tuesday 19th June 2012
quotequote all
DrTre said:
Prefer to think of myself as a sexual tigger.
Bounce around enthusiastically and am generally pretty amazing, including never getting lost in 'hundred acre wood'
Ah, the Four Spring Duck Cat Technique. Admirable.

McHaggis

50,789 posts

156 months

Tuesday 19th June 2012
quotequote all
DrTre said:
Prefer to think of myself as a sexual tigger.
Bounce around enthusiastically and am generally pretty amazing, including never getting lost in 'hundred acre wood'
Having a top made out of rubber and a bottom made out of springs must be useful.

RobbieKB

7,715 posts

184 months

Tuesday 19th June 2012
quotequote all
When I was about 10, a teacher on a school trip asked me to hold her handbag. I did so for all of 10 seconds, then handed it back. We returned to school and the entire of its population was called to an emergency assembly. They called me up the front and made me stand on a stage. They said to a good 200 pupils that I had rifled through a teacher's bag on a school trip and mocked her and that none of the students should ever grow up to be like me.

Fortunately, a teaching assistant collaborated my story of doing nothing wrong and that the teachers were gunning for me, as did a host of my 10 year old pals and after a large disciplinary hearing, the head and assistant head were threatened with being fired and some form of legal action taken.

That was bizarre, and I like to think character building. Although, more realistically, devastating to a ten year old. s!

sinizter

3,348 posts

187 months

Tuesday 19th June 2012
quotequote all
RobbieKB said:
When I was about 10, a teacher on a school trip asked me to hold her handbag. I did so for all of 10 seconds, then handed it back. We returned to school and the entire of its population was called to an emergency assembly. They called me up the front and made me stand on a stage. They said to a good 200 pupils that I had rifled through a teacher's bag on a school trip and mocked her and that none of the students should ever grow up to be like me.

Fortunately, a teaching assistant collaborated my story of doing nothing wrong and that the teachers were gunning for me, as did a host of my 10 year old pals and after a large disciplinary hearing, the head and assistant head were threatened with being fired.

That was bizarre, and I like to think character building. Although, more realistically, devastating to a ten year old. s!
Bizarre. Why would they do that ?

RobbieKB

7,715 posts

184 months

Tuesday 19th June 2012
quotequote all
sinizter said:
Bizarre. Why would they do that ?
There were 4 teachers who were given some form of black mark on their record for bullying (for want of a better word) a student (me). When I was 6, they also banned me from going out in my lunch hour and used to sit me in an office on my own. That lasted 7 months before someone noticed and told my parents.

Anyone got a tiny violin? hehe

PoleDriver

28,664 posts

195 months

Tuesday 19th June 2012
quotequote all
Carthage said:
PoleDriver said:
You We could always practice! ;-)
Fixed. laugh
I have been! smile

MiseryStreak

2,929 posts

208 months

Tuesday 19th June 2012
quotequote all
ShawCrossShark said:
Suck this it's foul?
Nearly...

"Yes."

"Well suck me cock, it's fowl."

getmecoat

Carthage

4,261 posts

145 months

Tuesday 19th June 2012
quotequote all
PoleDriver said:
I have been! smile
Good to know (carnally). wink

Don't tell JAYB I said this or he'll call me 'slutty' again.

jackh707

2,126 posts

157 months

Tuesday 19th June 2012
quotequote all
Carthage said:
nono

I didn't engage with the locals (sexually or socially) - it was all a bit too 'Wickerman' for me!
Oh god tell me about it, half of my family is from the forest of Dean. If I wasn't known locally it would be scary. Some nice roads though.

Carthage

4,261 posts

145 months

Tuesday 19th June 2012
quotequote all
jackh707 said:
Oh god tell me about it, half of my family is from the forest of Dean. If I wasn't known locally it would be scary. Some nice roads though.
Yeah, the one out.

blindswelledrat

25,257 posts

233 months

Tuesday 19th June 2012
quotequote all
DrTre said:
Prefer to think of myself as a sexual tigger.
Bounce around enthusiastically and am generally pretty amazing, including never getting lost in 'hundred acre wood'
Hundred acre wood is my pet name for my erection (massive of course)

Justayellowbadge

37,057 posts

243 months

Tuesday 19th June 2012
quotequote all
Carthage said:
Good to know (carnally). wink

Don't tell JAYB I said this or he'll call me 'slutty' again.
I certainly did not.

I am sure you are this pure:



jackh707

2,126 posts

157 months

Tuesday 19th June 2012
quotequote all
Carthage said:
Yeah, the one out.
.

biggrin quite.




blindswelledrat

25,257 posts

233 months

Tuesday 19th June 2012
quotequote all
I love how when a woman posts on PH, it is invariably the most interesting thing that has ever been posted, or so you would think by the fact that regradless of the contents of her post men race to quote her and engage in some kind of e-conversation in the vague hope that somehow this will result in sex of some kind.
Its really intriguing internet courtship ritual.
Im glad I have had sex before so don't need to do this.


Ps-Not directed at JAYB as it may seem by the fact it is beneath his discussion. On the contrary, he usually feels the need to provide a healthy contrast to these posts by popping in a blatant insult.

Carthage

4,261 posts

145 months

Tuesday 19th June 2012
quotequote all
Justayellowbadge said:
I certainly did not.

I am sure you are this pure:
Your eyesight is better than I'd thought, but your spelling so much worse. biggrin

rohrl

8,757 posts

146 months

Tuesday 19th June 2012
quotequote all
blindswelledrat said:
Ps-Not directed at JAYB as it may seem by the fact it is beneath his discussion. On the contrary, he usually feels the need to provide a healthy contrast to these posts by popping in a blatant insult.
Kiss-arse wink

JonRB

74,884 posts

273 months

Tuesday 19th June 2012
quotequote all
blindswelledrat said:
Im glad I have had sex before so don't need to do this.
It doesn't count if it was with an animal.

captainzep

13,305 posts

193 months

Tuesday 19th June 2012
quotequote all
blindswelledrat said:
Im glad I have had sex before so don't need to do this.
1973?