Cringeworthy things us blokes say

[iphonedyou]

Man maths. Snotter. 'What could go wrong?'. Pressing on.

[Aus90]

Of course I love you !!!!!!

[Dixy]

Asking the midwife to put an extra couple of stitches in.

[LordJammy]

ChemicalChaos said:

"Sure, I'll drive across the country to where you are to meet up [and end up being stood up]"

Twice, I've made that mistake

Nah. You just let yourself get mugged off pal.

[anonymous-user]

'Yeh I don't mind being friends, that's what I always wanted.'

(That is why I spend thousands on you and hours wasted just so you can be friends and f##k someone else.)

[technodup]

Spirited drive.

i.e driving like a wk.

[JakeT]

"I don't see why anyone would want to get married anyway. She could leave you tomorrow, taking all your assets with her"

So many men with commitment issues...

[Impasse]

JakeT said:

"I don't see why anyone would want to get married anyway. She could leave you tomorrow, taking all your assets with her"

So many men with commitment issues...

Or life experiences. You decide which is true.

[shirt]

threats of violence

[Katzenjammer]

"Nice place to be"

"New (to me")"

"Debaged"

"Badge delete"

"Sleeper"

[Joratk]

"That's what she said".

[GT03ROB]

Talk to me about (insert subject)

[Type R Tom]

Anyone who starts a sentence with "listen". Usually footballers.

[glazbagun]

"I'd hit that/She'd get it." Usually said by guys way past whatever sort of prime they may once have had about someone way out of their league.

[drivin_me_nuts]

Man the fk up..

Most of the time it's meaningless, but there are contexts when the stock response to that should be heated skewers through the bks.

[Johnspex]

Hoon.
Calling a car she.
They are a nice car (that one doesn't even make grammatical sense).
Drop in an LS7 crate engine.

[Bluedot]

Jimmy Recard said:

"I want to know you."

[daddy cool]

A little bit of me dies inside whenever someone refers to doing a trackday (ie, a non-compulsory, fun activity that they have chosen and paid to do) as "track work".

"yeah, im running Toyo R888's for track work"

Oh, fk off. You arent an F1 test driver.

And saying "running" too. fk off again.

[Adenauer]

A little bit of me dies inside.

[GT03ROB]

Inserting some technical phrase/acronym/number into a normal sentence to make it sound like you know what you are talking about, when it adds no value or you clearly don't. The opposite is also cringeworthy as in using a term that is perceived as "cool slang". Normally used to make it sound like you are an expert in military affairs.

The current thread on the crashed Russian airliner is one such place that is packed with such cringeworthy things.