Discussion
This actually reminds me of the dilemma my friend was in recently.
He got asked by a customer if he could carry out some building work for him, but the deal was that the customer wanted to pay cash so he could avoid paying the VAT.
Problem was that the job was a £70k house extension
So one evening we were sat thinking of all the ways he could spend or invest £70k in cash without getting caught.
He got asked by a customer if he could carry out some building work for him, but the deal was that the customer wanted to pay cash so he could avoid paying the VAT.
Problem was that the job was a £70k house extension
So one evening we were sat thinking of all the ways he could spend or invest £70k in cash without getting caught.
Many countries allow you to bring in cash sums up to a certain level without reporting it.
Take £10k out of your current account.
Rent a place in (as an example) Thailand. Make regular trips taking £10k in cash each time.
In the unlikely event you ever get stopped you can always point the authorities to that original £10k withdrawal.
Buy gold sovereigns for cash - would be lots of transactions. I walked through security with £3k of these in my hand luggage and a few more in my checked in bag. No problem and suprisingly easy to sell to gold dealers abroad.
Take £10k out of your current account.
Rent a place in (as an example) Thailand. Make regular trips taking £10k in cash each time.
In the unlikely event you ever get stopped you can always point the authorities to that original £10k withdrawal.
Buy gold sovereigns for cash - would be lots of transactions. I walked through security with £3k of these in my hand luggage and a few more in my checked in bag. No problem and suprisingly easy to sell to gold dealers abroad.
wiffmaster said:
* Set up art gallery in posh London location
Looking at some of the s- Train a chimp to paint rubbish 'modern art' pieces and put them in the window display at £5,000 a pop
- 'Sell' a couple of pieces each week (by 'sell' I mean 'throw on a bonfire')
t that sells for silly amounts I have no doubt this is a tried and test method. If it were me, I'd buy a rather nice yacht for cash, £315k, in my case a Beneteau Oceanis 55 (see below) and then set sail for warmer climes. Most places in the Caribbean are amenable to cash purchases so with the remaining £440k cash I'd buy a nice little house, lots of rum, and then see my days out doing charter sailing for rich American tourists of the pretty female persuasion. I met a chap in Barbados last year who's life is pretty much what I described; 2-3 top end charters a week pays for him to run 2 catamarans and to have a nice house.
Jonmx said:
If it were me, I'd buy a rather nice yacht for cash, £315k, in my case a Beneteau Oceanis 55 (see below) and then set sail for warmer climes. Most places in the Caribbean are amenable to cash purchases so with the remaining £440k cash I'd buy a nice little house, lots of rum, and then see my days out doing charter sailing for rich American tourists of the pretty female persuasion. I met a chap in Barbados last year who's life is pretty much what I described; 2-3 top end charters a week pays for him to run 2 catamarans and to have a nice house.
Nice idea. How are you getting the cash to the Caribbean in the first place?bloomen said:
ex1 said:
How do you turn the cash into bit coins in the first place?
Meet a sweaty man in an alley after arranging a meet on Localbitcoins.com. Several hundred of them. Edited by bloomen on Thursday 4th May 00:40
NinjaPower said:
I wouldn't bother trying to launder it through a business. Too easy to get caught.
I would just spend it on minor things that I would otherwise use my legal income for.
Need a couple of new £1000 TV's for thee house? Use the cash.
Need a new apple laptop and iPad? Use the cash.
Need new clothes and watches? Use the cash.
Filling the cars up with fuel each week? Use the cash.
Doing the weekly shop at the supermarket? Use the cash.
Buying furniture or home improvements? New kitchen or bathroom? Use the cash.
Booking a fancy holiday? Go to a local travel agent and pay cash.
That way, your legitimate income money will pile up in your bank account and everyone is happy
If you are investigated, you'll soon be picked up that you are still living without spending any of your money in your account. I would just spend it on minor things that I would otherwise use my legal income for.
Need a couple of new £1000 TV's for thee house? Use the cash.
Need a new apple laptop and iPad? Use the cash.
Need new clothes and watches? Use the cash.
Filling the cars up with fuel each week? Use the cash.
Doing the weekly shop at the supermarket? Use the cash.
Buying furniture or home improvements? New kitchen or bathroom? Use the cash.
Booking a fancy holiday? Go to a local travel agent and pay cash.
That way, your legitimate income money will pile up in your bank account and everyone is happy
Those fixed betting machines would be my way.
It would take a few years but home improvements paid for in cash, or part paid in cash, then sell your house and clean the profits. Repeat over until you have worked through your dodgy cash.
Millions of pounds a year form the UK heroin trade are cleaned through takeaways and food wholesalers. Chuck in a taxi firm and maybe a car wash and your laughing.
Millions of pounds a year form the UK heroin trade are cleaned through takeaways and food wholesalers. Chuck in a taxi firm and maybe a car wash and your laughing.
jas xjr said:
buy a house that needs work , totally refurb it. pay the builders in cash . i knew of somebody that bought some land and built a house to clean up some money in this way. he claimed he had built the house himself.
it would not be a quick fix but it is doable.
It would take you years to filter all that cash to a builder and by then he'll be wondering why you're paying him in bank notes that are several generations old!it would not be a quick fix but it is doable.
ex1 said:
Nice idea. How are you getting the cash to the Caribbean in the first place?
More than that, how is he going to spend £315k cash on a boat without anyone asking the odd question? Money laundering rules would require permission to receive that much, surely?I'm surprised no one has mentioned hand car wash businesses. And if you were in a criminal gang deep enough to get a £750k payment, wouldn't you be in with people who are specialists at sorting a bit of money laundering?
Jimmy Recard said:
I'm surprised no one has mentioned hand car wash businesses. And if you were in a criminal gang deep enough to get a £750k payment, wouldn't you be in with people who are specialists at sorting a bit of money laundering?
can't remember said:
Chuck in a taxi firm and maybe a car wash and your laughing.
The buy to let market in the sthole parts of Manchester is primarily funded with dirty (of varying levels of dirtyness) money.I think I'd book a skiing holiday in the Swiss alps with some other people who are all none the wiser, staying in a self catering chalet. I don't know if this would work because I don't know if the whole Swiss banking thing is how it is in films
Drive there with the cash hidden in luggage or somewhere else in the car.
Get to the chalet and one of the evenings, go out to the pub for a quick one and roll in after midnight pretending you're really, really drunk after going too hard on the apres ski with some people you'd just met.
When your friends get up for skiing in the morning, pretend to be too tired and hungover and you'll sit it out or catch up with them later.
Take a day trip to somewhere you can deposit it and rock up back to the chalet to meet your friends. Continue your holiday.
I bet this wouldn't work for some reason I've overlooked
Drive there with the cash hidden in luggage or somewhere else in the car.
Get to the chalet and one of the evenings, go out to the pub for a quick one and roll in after midnight pretending you're really, really drunk after going too hard on the apres ski with some people you'd just met.
When your friends get up for skiing in the morning, pretend to be too tired and hungover and you'll sit it out or catch up with them later.
Take a day trip to somewhere you can deposit it and rock up back to the chalet to meet your friends. Continue your holiday.
I bet this wouldn't work for some reason I've overlooked
It would take several years but I'd buy a burger van thats 50k\year taken care of excluding costs.
A temporary Christmas stall. Either market stall or one of those calender type shops in an arcade. The latter would see 50k and closed down before inspectors started sniffing.
I think it would take about 10 years.
The other thing to watch out for is hmrc's new toy. Dvla pings up a new car and no money withdrawn from bank may possibly flash up. Other cost of living not coming out of bank account may also flash up.
A temporary Christmas stall. Either market stall or one of those calender type shops in an arcade. The latter would see 50k and closed down before inspectors started sniffing.
I think it would take about 10 years.
The other thing to watch out for is hmrc's new toy. Dvla pings up a new car and no money withdrawn from bank may possibly flash up. Other cost of living not coming out of bank account may also flash up.
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