My Wife is annoyed at me because...

[nonsequitur]

Condi said:

My wife is annoyed at me....



Oh, wait, I'm single so can do what I want, when I want, with who I want, and don't have to put up with all the nonsense in this thread.

So far.

[wolfracesonic]

Condi said:

The problem with having a wife is they expect you to always be doing "things". Just stuff.... clean this, fix that, spend time with them etc.

They don't seem to understand that men sometimes just want to sit in front of the TV with a beer and watch the rugby. Like now, for example. And that is a perfectly good use of time. Sometimes, a man might have no plans for the day at all, and that too is fine. Women can't do that, they dont understand.

Bill Burr shares your painIs that pesto? 1.30 in.

[CanAm]

320d is all you need said:

Cotty said:

That is exactly what I mean. Driving into someone elses car and then blaming the other person is wrong.

Oh apologies. I perhaps assumed that you meant the woman in this case shouldn't be blamed!

That's how I originally read it too.

[J4CKO]

Mine is like "Dont buy any st in the shopping", i.e. cakes, biscuits etc. If I do I get moaned at.

Then, she will go on a Wednesday night, "Have you got anything", so I crack and offer my emergency M and Ms, and she says "I dont really like these" whilst scoffing them !

[Pit Pony]

J4CKO said:

Mine is like "Dont buy any st in the shopping", i.e. cakes, biscuits etc. If I do I get moaned at.

Then, she will go on a Wednesday night, "Have you got anything", so I crack and offer my emergency M and Ms, and she says "I dont really like these" whilst scoffing them !

Instructions.......Keep to the list.

Question 2 hours later when ive unpacked the shopping............Did you not buy any treats for me? That's thoughtless.

[RC1807]

Starfighter said:

Are you sure she’s not a bloke?

Yeah. Very sure. A few features give it away that's she's not.

[phil-sti]

My wife is annoyed at me because she varnished the doors incorrectly and made a mess of them but it’s my fault because if it wasn’t for my dog she wouldn’t have had to varnish them.......

[antspants]

Pit Pony said:

Instructions.......Keep to the list.

Question 2 hours later when ive unpacked the shopping............Did you not buy any treats for me? That's thoughtless.

I used to nip to the local shop in the evening if my son and I fancied some sweets or chocolate.
I'd ask my ex wife if she wanted anything, "no thanks" then on my return with a bag of goodies "did you not get me a surprise?"
After that happened a couple of times I learnt and came back with a bag of Maltesers, then got moaned at "are you trying to make me fat?" as she ripped the bag open. You can't win!

[Trophy Husband]

She asked "Does my bum look big in this?"
I said "Sweetheart, we're in the bathroom and it is the smallest room in the house."

[ThunderSpook]

I ordered her a takeaway curry that she wanted for her and a friend, asked her what she wanted me to order.

Chicken Tikka Masala
Peshwari Naan
Mushroom Rice
Pilau Rice
3 Poppadoms

I asked if that was everything and was told yes.

Picked it up, brought it home. Where’s the dips? What dips. Don’t tell me you didn’t order dips? You didn’t tell me to order dips, I ordered what you told me to order.

I don’t eat curry so I don’t know what’s required, hence me asking what she wanted.

[soxboy]

To be fair you would normally expect a pickle tray to come with poppadoms.

[Jasandjules]

Trophy Husband said:

She asked "Does my bum look big in this?"
I said "Sweetheart, we're in the bathroom and it is the smallest room in the house."

A person less diplomatic than me may have once replied to his wife "No it is the fat that does that"............

[markcoznottz]

Trophy Husband said:

She asked "Does my bum look big in this?"
I said "Sweetheart, we're in the bathroom and it is the smallest room in the house."

‘If you’ve got any feet I’ll dance with you’ ...,
Roy chubby brown 1987..

[Cotty]

soxboy said:

To be fair you would normally expect a pickle tray to come with poppadoms.

just looked up my indian take away and you have to order the pickle seperately. Simply if you want it ask for it.

I see a lot of posts that seem like "you should have read my mind and got what I wanted". Personally I find it easier to ask for what I want then there are no misunderstandings.

[glenrobbo]

Cotty said:

just looked up my indian take away and you have to order the pickle seperately. Simply if you want it ask for it.

I see a lot of posts that seem like "you should have read my mind and got what I wanted". Personally I find it easier to ask for what I want then there are no misunderstandings.

Proof positive that Cotty is not a woman.

[catman]

It's true. If a man wants something, they usually just say so. A woman will expect you to know what she wants and then gets huffy when you don't get/do it.

[amusingduck]

Trophy Husband said:

She asked "Does my bum look big in this?"
I said "Sweetheart, we're in the bathroom and it is the smallest room in the house."

It's 2020, the correct answer is "hell yeah!"

[Robertj21a]

catman said:

It's true. If a man wants something, they usually just say so. A woman will expect you to know what she wants and then gets huffy when you don't get/do it.

T'was always the same. One day us men will remember to act accordingly.

[4Q]

At little bit NSFW
https://youtu.be/zo6weN7VSa4

[Benmac]

Perusing the exact details of the new lockdown my wife noted that elite sport will still be permitted. I commented that her Pilates classes should therefore run as normal.