Marriage is Over....
Discussion
Your dignity and your kids are all that is now important. Keep both or have access to both and you are well on the way. Treat her now with complete indifference. There are only two true human emotions. One is love and the other one indicates your complete ambivalence to them and complete detachment to what they chose to do next.
This is the hardest thing for any woman to come to terms with - the fact that they just don't matter any more.
Last thing to add is that you've had a bad experience with a wrong'un (and I'll add I've been blind and done the same) - all woman are not the same.
Good Luck and as others have offered - any help is a PM away.
This is the hardest thing for any woman to come to terms with - the fact that they just don't matter any more.
Last thing to add is that you've had a bad experience with a wrong'un (and I'll add I've been blind and done the same) - all woman are not the same.
Good Luck and as others have offered - any help is a PM away.
JDRoest said:
Not really. It sounds stupid, but the key to finding a good woman is finding one who actually likes you in the first place. Forget the bedroom stuff, forget whether they are funny, sociable, all the rest, and whether you click with them, but whether they genuinely like you.
All the rest kinda falls into place afterwards.
Mine liked me and went on and on about making me happy and all she did was make me more miserable and finally fooked me over. Just because she likes you doesn't mean she'll continue liking you.All the rest kinda falls into place afterwards.
Same thing happened to me a couple of years ago, not married but lived together for 5 years before it started going pear shaped. Long story short, she started acting weird, blaming me for random stuff, talking of breaking up out of nowhere. I find texts on her phone from a chap at work, she finally admitted having "feelings" for this guy. We broke up. Few weeks later she wants to give it another go. We move back in together. A few months later the same weird stuff starts happening again. Break up number 2.. We tried to make it work for the last couple of years - not living together and I finally threw the towel in September last year. I still cant get over the trust issues. Hard decision but the only one for me to make IMO. I didn't want this all happening again down the line.
All the best to you OP. Personally I wouldn't worry about getting new chicks straight away. Do some stuff with your mates, get some hobbies if you don't have any already and just have a bit of fun.
All the best to you OP. Personally I wouldn't worry about getting new chicks straight away. Do some stuff with your mates, get some hobbies if you don't have any already and just have a bit of fun.
Thanks for all the kind words. I must admit I'm joking about going on the hunt for other women as I have much more pressing issues as the moment - like the kids. However, it raises a hope and a smile and I need that just now as cannot find the time to think about myself.
Unfortuantely this has all turned so f
ked up you couldn't write the script. Although over the weekend she admitted to the affair with 'Blokey' my spidey senses were tingling about others.
I've been a bit cute about it, taken my time and double bluffed but she also admitted that she has also been at it with a good mate of 25 years
Sadly, he is married with kids. I have texted him telling him I know but left it at that.
However, the worst is yet to come. Again the spidey senses were tingling about my best friend, in fact my confidante of the last few years, the guy I would share a beer with and pour my heart out to. I asked him down to the house. He came bringing beers. I poured him a drink and told him my wife had admitted to another affair with a friend, someone we had known for many years. I then turned, looked him in the eye and asked him if there was anything he wanted to say to me. He broke down. Finally admitting to it. Amazingly I didn't beat the living st out of the fker but got the information and calmly called my wife to tell her I knew. He is married with a young child and his wife works with my wife.
Actually, we talked for some time and I told him he now needs to leave, MTFU and tell his wife everything. He did and an hour later his wife is at my door sobbing and I told her everything that I knew.
I told you it was fked up and honestly if I was reading this I'd think it was all made up. I now feel utterly drained and totally and utterly betrayed
Unfortuantely this has all turned so f
ked up you couldn't write the script. Although over the weekend she admitted to the affair with 'Blokey' my spidey senses were tingling about others.I've been a bit cute about it, taken my time and double bluffed but she also admitted that she has also been at it with a good mate of 25 years
Sadly, he is married with kids. I have texted him telling him I know but left it at that.However, the worst is yet to come. Again the spidey senses were tingling about my best friend, in fact my confidante of the last few years, the guy I would share a beer with and pour my heart out to. I asked him down to the house. He came bringing beers. I poured him a drink and told him my wife had admitted to another affair with a friend, someone we had known for many years. I then turned, looked him in the eye and asked him if there was anything he wanted to say to me. He broke down. Finally admitting to it. Amazingly I didn't beat the living s
t out of the fker but got the information and calmly called my wife to tell her I knew. He is married with a young child and his wife works with my wife.Actually, we talked for some time and I told him he now needs to leave, MTFU and tell his wife everything. He did and an hour later his wife is at my door sobbing and I told her everything that I knew.
I told you it was f
ked up and honestly if I was reading this I'd think it was all made up. I now feel utterly drained and totally and utterly betrayed stuttgartmetal said:
Love is truly blind.
Your trying, she's moved on.
There's someone else
I assume you've been having sex with her, otherwise the ectopic's not possible.
She's gone back to work, and rekindled her romance. She's had a rethink.
She been out with her mayes lately?
Seen a friend you don't get on with, or one who will cover for her.
Spent a whole night out?
Been to a conference?
Once they love someone else there is absolutely nothing you can do about it.
Nothing.
Don't kid yourself.
Ice cold they turn.
Then blame you for a rewritten history in their mind telling you they were never really happy.
Kid yourself and carry on, and she'll be planning just how to easily separate you from your money.
Don't listen to what she is telling you.
Just look at her actions.
Start by getting your money secure.
Any overpaid mortgage, get your hands on the money before she does.
She'll throw the shutter down on you soon, believe me.
Its like a fuse has blown.
You'll not recognise her.
You think she's distant now? wait until she starts using the children as a weapon to hurt you.
That's pure \Kryptonite, and they love it.
Ive not seen my daughter for two years and 10 months.
They poison their minds.
Don't believe me?
Watch it happen.
Its the worst nightmare.
Woody Allen once said, you don't really know a woman until you meet her in court.
Get on www.wikivorce.com, and trawl a few mails.
Its the same old story again and again and again.
Ive done the divorce thing.
Its ten out of ten for bad.
And I mean f cking ten.
Don't believe a word of it when she's giving you the old, I don't know who thats from.
She's 100% shagging someone at work, and as much as you don't believe it, believe it.
She's moved on, take a good look.
Worst Poem EverYour trying, she's moved on.
There's someone else
I assume you've been having sex with her, otherwise the ectopic's not possible.
She's gone back to work, and rekindled her romance. She's had a rethink.
She been out with her mayes lately?
Seen a friend you don't get on with, or one who will cover for her.
Spent a whole night out?
Been to a conference?
Once they love someone else there is absolutely nothing you can do about it.
Nothing.
Don't kid yourself.
Ice cold they turn.
Then blame you for a rewritten history in their mind telling you they were never really happy.
Kid yourself and carry on, and she'll be planning just how to easily separate you from your money.
Don't listen to what she is telling you.
Just look at her actions.
Start by getting your money secure.
Any overpaid mortgage, get your hands on the money before she does.
She'll throw the shutter down on you soon, believe me.
Its like a fuse has blown.
You'll not recognise her.
You think she's distant now? wait until she starts using the children as a weapon to hurt you.
That's pure \Kryptonite, and they love it.
Ive not seen my daughter for two years and 10 months.
They poison their minds.
Don't believe me?
Watch it happen.
Its the worst nightmare.
Woody Allen once said, you don't really know a woman until you meet her in court.
Get on www.wikivorce.com, and trawl a few mails.
Its the same old story again and again and again.
Ive done the divorce thing.
Its ten out of ten for bad.
And I mean f cking ten.
Don't believe a word of it when she's giving you the old, I don't know who thats from.
She's 100% shagging someone at work, and as much as you don't believe it, believe it.
She's moved on, take a good look.
StottyZr said:
I'm not feeling very sensitive at the moment, apologies for this.
Although can I be the first to suggest you sleep with your mates wife?
Not this.Although can I be the first to suggest you sleep with your mates wife?
There are a lot of women in the world and you have the rest of your life to reflect on what's happened. As time goes on, the whole thing will become smaller and easier to handle and gradually, it won't own you. One day you'll realise you haven't thought about it for a while and that realisation will be a threshold. If you f
k around evening up the score, that threshold will take much, much longer or possibly cease to ever be possible.ShyTallKnight said:
Thanks for all the kind words. I must admit I'm joking about going on the hunt for other women as I have much more pressing issues as the moment - like the kids. However, it raises a hope and a smile and I need that just now as cannot find the time to think about myself.
Unfortuantely this has all turned so fked up you couldn't write the script. Although over the weekend she admitted to the affair with 'Blokey' my spidey senses were tingling about others.
I've been a bit cute about it, taken my time and double bluffed but she also admitted that she has also been at it with a good mate of 25 years Sadly, he is married with kids. I have texted him telling him I know but left it at that.
However, the worst is yet to come. Again the spidey senses were tingling about my best friend, in fact my confidante of the last few years, the guy I would share a beer with and pour my heart out to. I asked him down to the house. He came bringing beers. I poured him a drink and told him my wife had admitted to another affair with a friend, someone we had known for many years. I then turned, looked him in the eye and asked him if there was anything he wanted to say to me. He broke down. Finally admitting to it. Amazingly I didn't beat the living st out of the fker but got the information and calmly called my wife to tell her I knew. He is married with a young child and his wife works with my wife.
Actually, we talked for some time and I told him he now needs to leave, MTFU and tell his wife everything. He did and an hour later his wife is at my door sobbing and I told her everything that I knew.
I told you it was fked up and honestly if I was reading this I'd think it was all made up. I now feel utterly drained and totally and utterly betrayed
FECK!Unfortuantely this has all turned so f
ked up you couldn't write the script. Although over the weekend she admitted to the affair with 'Blokey' my spidey senses were tingling about others.I've been a bit cute about it, taken my time and double bluffed but she also admitted that she has also been at it with a good mate of 25 years
Sadly, he is married with kids. I have texted him telling him I know but left it at that.However, the worst is yet to come. Again the spidey senses were tingling about my best friend, in fact my confidante of the last few years, the guy I would share a beer with and pour my heart out to. I asked him down to the house. He came bringing beers. I poured him a drink and told him my wife had admitted to another affair with a friend, someone we had known for many years. I then turned, looked him in the eye and asked him if there was anything he wanted to say to me. He broke down. Finally admitting to it. Amazingly I didn't beat the living s
t out of the fker but got the information and calmly called my wife to tell her I knew. He is married with a young child and his wife works with my wife.Actually, we talked for some time and I told him he now needs to leave, MTFU and tell his wife everything. He did and an hour later his wife is at my door sobbing and I told her everything that I knew.
I told you it was f
ked up and honestly if I was reading this I'd think it was all made up. I now feel utterly drained and totally and utterly betrayed Oh, and the wife of the other bloke? Well, she needs to know as well.
VinceFox said:
StottyZr said:
I'm not feeling very sensitive at the moment, apologies for this.
Although can I be the first to suggest you sleep with your mates wife?
Not this.Although can I be the first to suggest you sleep with your mates wife?
There are a lot of women in the world and you have the rest of your life to reflect on what's happened. As time goes on, the whole thing will become smaller and easier to handle and gradually, it won't own you. One day you'll realise you haven't thought about it for a while and that realisation will be a threshold. If you f
k around evening up the score, that threshold will take much, much longer or possibly cease to ever be possible.
StottyZr said:
VinceFox said:
StottyZr said:
I'm not feeling very sensitive at the moment, apologies for this.
Although can I be the first to suggest you sleep with your mates wife?
Not this.Although can I be the first to suggest you sleep with your mates wife?
There are a lot of women in the world and you have the rest of your life to reflect on what's happened. As time goes on, the whole thing will become smaller and easier to handle and gradually, it won't own you. One day you'll realise you haven't thought about it for a while and that realisation will be a threshold. If you f
k around evening up the score, that threshold will take much, much longer or possibly cease to ever be possible.
ShyTallKnight said:
Thanks for all the kind words. I must admit I'm joking about going on the hunt for other women as I have much more pressing issues as the moment - like the kids. However, it raises a hope and a smile and I need that just now as cannot find the time to think about myself.
Unfortuantely this has all turned so fked up you couldn't write the script. Although over the weekend she admitted to the affair with 'Blokey' my spidey senses were tingling about others.
I've been a bit cute about it, taken my time and double bluffed but she also admitted that she has also been at it with a good mate of 25 years Sadly, he is married with kids. I have texted him telling him I know but left it at that.
However, the worst is yet to come. Again the spidey senses were tingling about my best friend, in fact my confidante of the last few years, the guy I would share a beer with and pour my heart out to. I asked him down to the house. He came bringing beers. I poured him a drink and told him my wife had admitted to another affair with a friend, someone we had known for many years. I then turned, looked him in the eye and asked him if there was anything he wanted to say to me. He broke down. Finally admitting to it. Amazingly I didn't beat the living st out of the fker but got the information and calmly called my wife to tell her I knew. He is married with a young child and his wife works with my wife.
Actually, we talked for some time and I told him he now needs to leave, MTFU and tell his wife everything. He did and an hour later his wife is at my door sobbing and I told her everything that I knew.
I told you it was fked up and honestly if I was reading this I'd think it was all made up. I now feel utterly drained and totally and utterly betrayed
Holy sUnfortuantely this has all turned so f
ked up you couldn't write the script. Although over the weekend she admitted to the affair with 'Blokey' my spidey senses were tingling about others.I've been a bit cute about it, taken my time and double bluffed but she also admitted that she has also been at it with a good mate of 25 years
Sadly, he is married with kids. I have texted him telling him I know but left it at that.However, the worst is yet to come. Again the spidey senses were tingling about my best friend, in fact my confidante of the last few years, the guy I would share a beer with and pour my heart out to. I asked him down to the house. He came bringing beers. I poured him a drink and told him my wife had admitted to another affair with a friend, someone we had known for many years. I then turned, looked him in the eye and asked him if there was anything he wanted to say to me. He broke down. Finally admitting to it. Amazingly I didn't beat the living s
t out of the fker but got the information and calmly called my wife to tell her I knew. He is married with a young child and his wife works with my wife.Actually, we talked for some time and I told him he now needs to leave, MTFU and tell his wife everything. He did and an hour later his wife is at my door sobbing and I told her everything that I knew.
I told you it was f
ked up and honestly if I was reading this I'd think it was all made up. I now feel utterly drained and totally and utterly betrayed t. Sounds like you need to get away from this lot, sharpish.VinceFox said:
Not this.
There are a lot of women in the world and you have the rest of your life to reflect on what's happened. As time goes on, the whole thing will become smaller and easier to handle and gradually, it won't own you. One day you'll realise you haven't thought about it for a while and that realisation will be a threshold. If you fk around evening up the score, that threshold will take much, much longer or possibly cease to ever be possible.
This is great advice. Time to get away from it for a bit and give yourself time to react.There are a lot of women in the world and you have the rest of your life to reflect on what's happened. As time goes on, the whole thing will become smaller and easier to handle and gradually, it won't own you. One day you'll realise you haven't thought about it for a while and that realisation will be a threshold. If you f
k around evening up the score, that threshold will take much, much longer or possibly cease to ever be possible.One thing i would be cautious of however is being absent from the family home for too long. You're ealing with a very volatile and uneven playing field atm, the fine balance you have to walk is protecting your interests without inflaming the situation. There's going to be a lot of attempting to rewrite history happening imminently and justifying things like changing the locks on you will come surprisingly easily. I'm not saying it will, but it definitely could happen, don't give the idea space to plant itself and grow by being away from the house too much.
I've said it before, but sincerely, good luck. Stay the course and remember things as they have actually happened, not how they're going to be skewed.
I've said it before, but sincerely, good luck. Stay the course and remember things as they have actually happened, not how they're going to be skewed.
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