Sean Connery Joke Thread (Vol 8)
Discussion
kowalski655 said:
Im afraid this one requires a few actions when being told
A man & woman met in a lift,he asks where she is going.She says "the blood bank,they pay £20 for each donation"."Oh",he says,"Im off to the sperm bank,they pay £100 for every donation there."
She walks out of the lift in a huff.
Next day they meet in the lift again."Where are you off to today" he asks.
(At this point you need to take a sip of milk you have on hand and dribble it as She says...)
"Sperm bank"
You realise you have posted this in the joke thread A man & woman met in a lift,he asks where she is going.She says "the blood bank,they pay £20 for each donation"."Oh",he says,"Im off to the sperm bank,they pay £100 for every donation there."
She walks out of the lift in a huff.
Next day they meet in the lift again."Where are you off to today" he asks.
(At this point you need to take a sip of milk you have on hand and dribble it as She says...)
"Sperm bank"
kowalski655 said:
Im afraid this one requires a few actions when being told
A man & woman met in a lift,he asks where she is going.She says "the blood bank,they pay £20 for each donation"."Oh",he says,"Im off to the sperm bank,they pay £100 for every donation there."
She walks out of the lift in a huff.
Next day they meet in the lift again."Where are you off to today" he asks.
(At this point you need to take a sip of milk you have on hand and dribble it as She says...)
"Sperm bank"
A man & woman met in a lift,he asks where she is going.She says "the blood bank,they pay £20 for each donation"."Oh",he says,"Im off to the sperm bank,they pay £100 for every donation there."
She walks out of the lift in a huff.
Next day they meet in the lift again."Where are you off to today" he asks.
(At this point you need to take a sip of milk you have on hand and dribble it as She says...)
"Sperm bank"
ob for that toaster over there'kowalski655 said:
Im afraid this one requires a few actions when being told
A man & woman met in a lift,he asks where she is going.She says "the blood bank,they pay £20 for each donation"."Oh",he says,"Im off to the sperm bank,they pay £100 for every donation there."
She walks out of the lift in a huff.
Next day they meet in the lift again."Where are you off to today" he asks.
(At this point you need to take a sip of milk you have on hand and dribble it as She says...)
"Sperm bank"
The version I heard was, several men queuing to get into a sperm bank, one notices a woman in the queue. He approaches her and says, "You do realise this is a sperm bank?" and she nods (you have to pretend your mouth is full when you do it).A man & woman met in a lift,he asks where she is going.She says "the blood bank,they pay £20 for each donation"."Oh",he says,"Im off to the sperm bank,they pay £100 for every donation there."
She walks out of the lift in a huff.
Next day they meet in the lift again."Where are you off to today" he asks.
(At this point you need to take a sip of milk you have on hand and dribble it as She says...)
"Sperm bank"
Brian, the world's leading expert on European wasps and the sounds that they make, is taking a stroll down his local high street. As he passes by the record shop, a sign catches his eye. "Just Released - New LP - Wasps of the World & the sounds that they make - available now"
Unable to resist the temptation, Brian goes into the shop. "I am the world's leading expert on European wasps and the sounds that they make. I'd very much like to listen to the new LP you have advertised in the window."
"Certainly, Sir," says the young man behind the counter. "If you'd like to step into the booth and put on the headphones, I'll put the LP on for you."
Brian, the world's leading expert on European wasps, goes into the booth and puts on the earphones.
Ten minutes later, he comes out of the booth and announces, "I am the world's leading expert on European wasps and the sounds that they make and yet I recognized none of those."
"I'm sorry Sir," says the young assistant. "If you'd care to step into the booth, I can let you have another 10 minutes."
Brian, the world's leading expert on European wasps and the sounds they make, steps back into the booth and replaces the headphones. Ten minutes later, he comes out of the booth shaking his head. "I don't understand it," he says, "I am the worlds leading expert on European wasps and the sounds that they make, and yet I still can't recognise any of those!"
"I really am terribly sorry," says the young assistant, "I've just realised I was playing you the bee side!"
Unable to resist the temptation, Brian goes into the shop. "I am the world's leading expert on European wasps and the sounds that they make. I'd very much like to listen to the new LP you have advertised in the window."
"Certainly, Sir," says the young man behind the counter. "If you'd like to step into the booth and put on the headphones, I'll put the LP on for you."
Brian, the world's leading expert on European wasps, goes into the booth and puts on the earphones.
Ten minutes later, he comes out of the booth and announces, "I am the world's leading expert on European wasps and the sounds that they make and yet I recognized none of those."
"I'm sorry Sir," says the young assistant. "If you'd care to step into the booth, I can let you have another 10 minutes."
Brian, the world's leading expert on European wasps and the sounds they make, steps back into the booth and replaces the headphones. Ten minutes later, he comes out of the booth shaking his head. "I don't understand it," he says, "I am the worlds leading expert on European wasps and the sounds that they make, and yet I still can't recognise any of those!"
"I really am terribly sorry," says the young assistant, "I've just realised I was playing you the bee side!"
Gassing Station | The Lounge | Top of Page | What's New | My Stuff