Any other expectant Dads?
Discussion
tomble22 said:
We're thinking about number 2 at the moment but it does worry me how much harder it will be. Having spoken to a few people, 2 years between seems to be a good age gap so that's what we're thinking at the moment, but that may change!
Ours are 4 years apart:Upsides:
- Eldest was engaged and helped from day one (fetching nappies, etc)
- Now she is 6 she is able to play / entertain youngest for a few mins and even read her stories (which is very very cute)
- Less squabbling over toys as they are quite different toys
- Don't have 2 lots of nursery bills...
- The age gap means they do have different interests so planning days out, etc is starting to be trickier (i.e youngest is getting into soft play etc, eldest is too old for some)
- The youngest is always a distraction for the eldest and the eldest can regress at times as she sees her younger sister getting more attention, comforting, hugs etc.
Either way..
- First 6 months is relatively easy aside from the lack of sleep as the youngest isn't mobile
- 6-24 months is really hard !
- 2 up gets a bit easier
Merry said:
richatnort said:
Thanks for all this it's really useful! i've joined the main group one for now to see if i can find anything there. In terms of the rash was it all over their body? On H it's just on her face around her cheek & eye lash area only and hasn't spread anywhere else, to me it looks like the below picture (not my baby got off the internet) which makes me wonder if it is an allergy as she doesn't have horrible nappies, they are yellow & had one green one today according to my wife, was gaining weight up to today, settled at night she sleeps in the day and has a good sleeping pattern at night with only two times she wakes up at 2 & 4ish. She doesn't cry unless she's hungry or done a poo.
Just a bit confused, i know it can be different in every baby but i thought she might have some of the same symptoms of your baby.
Our boy got spotty at about 4-8 weeks. It looked very much like that. Just a bit confused, i know it can be different in every baby but i thought she might have some of the same symptoms of your baby.
They were just that. No allergies or anything.
I popped out to Tesco Express last night just to grab a couple of things
In the 5 minutes that it took me to do the round trip, daughter had wanted to show my wife the entire contents of her stomach over our freshly-changed bed linen.
This then proceeded over her own freshly changed bed linen about an hour later, and then over me, wife, sofa, living room rug, everything.
Wouldn't even keep water down, so by 7am this morning I had to make a decision, and went along to the walk-in centre.
Their advice - do it, if you're worried, don't just wait and see. Fortunately nothing serious in this case, probably something from one of the other kids at a party she went to over the weekend, so she's on 5ml of Dioralyte every 5-10 mins to get re-hydrated, and that seems to be helping her perk up.
It was only when my parents came over to help out that I noticed the pizza I had put in for my own dinner last night was still in the oven - I'd switched it off when I got back from Tesco as the beeper was going whilst my wife was dealing with "the event" and run on without it since then!
tomble22 said:
Our little girl (nearly 1) generally sleeps from 7/7:30pm through to 6:30/7:00am but when teething or feeling a bit under the weather can be up for a couple of hours in the night as well. The last 2 weeks we've probably had 7 or 8 days of sleeping right through and then 6 or 7 days of waking up around 1 or 2am. Pot luck i think!
Ours are both the same 7:30/8pm till 6:30am. I don’t think I will ever get used to 6:30am starts even after 5 years of doing them but at least it’s a routine and consistent. ST_Nuts said:
A WEEK? Christ, 6 hours was long enough for me at a time!
Happy to report, at 9 weeks old ours is now sleeping for around 9-10 hours at night.. bliss
(I know it won't last!!)
Don't be so pessimistic, my 6 year old does 7-7 each night and has done since about 8 weeks so you might have got a deep sleeper Happy to report, at 9 weeks old ours is now sleeping for around 9-10 hours at night.. bliss
(I know it won't last!!)On the negative side they'll most likely be the last ones out of nappies as it takes a lot to wake them and they won't like being woken up in the morning.
Our 2.5 year old on the other hand is a very light sleeper and springs up in the morning when you open the door and also wakes up in the night, although usually she gets a drink and then goes back to sleep so as long as she hasn't drunk all her water she doesn't usually disturb me (I'm the deep sleeper!).
I think that we are lucky for sure but having a sleeping time routine helped ( 90% of the time, they get later night's sometimes, holiday's, grandparents, birthday's etc.) and most of all they have never slept in our bed! If the eldest is ill (and he's got a weak stomach like father unfortunately) sometimes he and I will sleep in the spare room so my wife can get some sleep but other than that they're always in their own beds.
Joshsl said:
Found out this morning that number two is on the way, my current one is 4 on friday. i wanted a smaller age gap ideally as it gets all the things like school and toilet training and teething out of the way at around the same time.
its safe to say i am bricking it a bit
Congrats! See my notes above about 4 year gap....its safe to say i am bricking it a bit
Joshsl said:
Found out this morning that number two is on the way, my current one is 4 on friday. i wanted a smaller age gap ideally as it gets all the things like school and toilet training and teething out of the way at around the same time.
its safe to say i am bricking it a bit
Congrats! On your point about a smaller age gap, that brings its' own challenges - ours are 23 months apart and eldest took some time to accept youngest. Granted, that was only temporary though but even almost two years is still quite a long time for kids that age so they will still be at fairly different stages for stuff like teething and toilet training etc. We started family a bit later so didn't want to wait too long between them, we'd have left it maybe another year or so if we'd been younger ourselves.its safe to say i am bricking it a bit
At the end of the day it'll be (sometimes) blissful chaos anyway so embrace and enjoy the madness!
Joshsl said:
Found out this morning that number two is on the way, my current one is 4 on friday. i wanted a smaller age gap ideally as it gets all the things like school and toilet training and teething out of the way at around the same time.
its safe to say i am bricking it a bit
Congratulations! its safe to say i am bricking it a bit
I am also bricking it but hoping the fact we've done it all once before will help
Joshsl said:
Thanks for the congratulations people, i'm more worried about the money side of things, i've got a decent salary of 40-45k but my Mrs has just dropped her hours and doesn't get paid well but we should be ok. ill have to try and remember how to do everything
Are you able to reuse everything from last time? That seemed to be the biggest hit for us.
We are the other way around. I am the higher earner, so this time round we will be trying out the new shared parental leave which hopefully softens the blow a bit.
£45k a year and worried about money? Jeezo, wish I had stuff like that to worry about! I don't think babies are dear, unless you choose to go that route. Chap at work, basic wage and wife on a low income was busy telling me how they have a wee one due in January... he's just spent £799.00 on a travel system to add to the couple of grand he's spent already buying the 'must have' kit including all new clothes, nursery furniture, bottles, steriliser... you name it, he's bought it and looks like he's on the verge of a coronary already and is planning to work all the overtime he can just to survive.
My sister and her man, average income, just bought a house and also got one due in January. She's got pretty everything too, travel system, clothes, Next To Me cot, second baby seat, nursery kitted out, painted etc. She worked out shed spent £75 in total. Thats not a typo. That said, mine is two and still rocks around in his Mothercare Urban Cruiser or whatever it is buggy that we bought 3yes ago, as new and as part of a full travel system from Barnardos for about £40. He's still in his £10 cot too.
Clothes wise, he's a wee boy... stuff lasts about an hour at best so more often than not he's kitted out in hand me down stuff from his cousins or friends kids. Most of which was all brand new and unworn as people had gone mental buying stuff that ended up being far too much and not used.
I guess if you need to have it all new or big names be it choice or due to peer pressure or what not, then I can see why it's a dear game. But if you don't need to do that, it's not a big financial burden. Cut your cloth accordingly and all that. We both work part time, share child care and neither of us have huge wages but we do OK. Granted no new cars or holidays on the yacht but no debts, mortgage almost paid off. In my line of work, I see so many people in financial difficulty yet there will be a i-candy pram sat and an Evoque on the drive, nails immaculate... borrowing money to buy nappies. Heartbreaking.
My sister and her man, average income, just bought a house and also got one due in January. She's got pretty everything too, travel system, clothes, Next To Me cot, second baby seat, nursery kitted out, painted etc. She worked out shed spent £75 in total. Thats not a typo. That said, mine is two and still rocks around in his Mothercare Urban Cruiser or whatever it is buggy that we bought 3yes ago, as new and as part of a full travel system from Barnardos for about £40. He's still in his £10 cot too.
Clothes wise, he's a wee boy... stuff lasts about an hour at best so more often than not he's kitted out in hand me down stuff from his cousins or friends kids. Most of which was all brand new and unworn as people had gone mental buying stuff that ended up being far too much and not used.
I guess if you need to have it all new or big names be it choice or due to peer pressure or what not, then I can see why it's a dear game. But if you don't need to do that, it's not a big financial burden. Cut your cloth accordingly and all that. We both work part time, share child care and neither of us have huge wages but we do OK. Granted no new cars or holidays on the yacht but no debts, mortgage almost paid off. In my line of work, I see so many people in financial difficulty yet there will be a i-candy pram sat and an Evoque on the drive, nails immaculate... borrowing money to buy nappies. Heartbreaking.
Sat in hospital waiting... for number 3... though the first little one only made it to 5 days old.
Can’t wait to get home and crack on.
2.5yr gap.
Spent sod all first time, but all new... reusing everything (except mattresses etc) again.
Will be going straight into a full size cot.
I swear nearly everything you can buy for kids these days has got s
tter, more expensive, and less needed, even in the short 5 years we’ve been getting stuff.
Can’t wait to get home and crack on.
2.5yr gap.
Spent sod all first time, but all new... reusing everything (except mattresses etc) again.
Will be going straight into a full size cot.
I swear nearly everything you can buy for kids these days has got s
tter, more expensive, and less needed, even in the short 5 years we’ve been getting stuff.Mr Whippy said:
Sat in hospital waiting... for number 3... though the first little one only made it to 5 days old.
Can’t wait to get home and crack on.
2.5yr gap.
Spent sod all first time, but all new... reusing everything (except mattresses etc) again.
Will be going straight into a full size cot.
I swear nearly everything you can buy for kids these days has got stter, more expensive, and less needed, even in the short 5 years we’ve been getting stuff.
Hope number 3 makes an appearance soon and you get discharged quickly. Can’t wait to get home and crack on.
2.5yr gap.
Spent sod all first time, but all new... reusing everything (except mattresses etc) again.
Will be going straight into a full size cot.
I swear nearly everything you can buy for kids these days has got s
tter, more expensive, and less needed, even in the short 5 years we’ve been getting stuff.I agree with the products being worse and less needed.
I didn't buy anything the first time around until we needed it. (Obviously had a cot and car seat sorted before arrival).
What with Amazon prime at my fingertips, most things could arrive next day or even same day.
We will have a not quite 3 year gap and will be reusing everything. I bought what I could second hand but everything gets so little use from a baby that its all as good as new for the next one still.
I'm not planning on any more after this one, although my husband has other ideas. I am quite looking forward to selling or donating everything once we are done with it to claim back my loft once again.
Mr Whippy said:
Also looking forward to finally getting rid of stuff that’s been kicking around for years.
You forget how much stuff you end up with.
Things I won't missYou forget how much stuff you end up with.
- baby xylophone
- fisher price piano
- a steering wheel that talks to you "to the petrol station"
- cute little rocking horse than is inexplicably crap and frequently flips over backwards with toddler
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