New to massage....

[308mate]

Parsnip said:

funkyrobot said:

Parsnip said:

ewenm said:

The sports massages I have are far too painful for any other reaction to happen.

Correct.

The physio I use is a South African bloke with finger like sausages - have reflexively swore at him more than once "oooh ya fker" etc. Even if it was a blonde stunner doing it, the sheer pain involved would put the little fella off his game so to speak.

Edited by Parsnip on Wednesday 11th August 22:01

Cumberland?

Nah, Edinburgh.

Same guy the Hearts football team go to, but I don't let that put me off.

Not Lincolnshire then?

[Mr Gearchange]

Brother D said:

NoNeed said:

M@H said:

LukeBird said:

Brother D said:

Well, with a guy yeah fine, no boner issues. Except I have an aversion (strong) to having any guys touching me. (Must have been the all boys school thing).
P.s. Have to add, I'm not homophobic.
P.p.s Also more gay guys the better as far as I'm concerned. Improves the guy/girl ratio, can't get my head round guys that are completely homophobic. I've met a lot of gay guys, and in my experience if they were in the market the pool of girls would be significantly reduced. -Anyway back to the thread.

O/T but you sound like a bender.

P.S. Really

P.P.S. Really.

I was going to say that


Now which closet is he in?

Meh - I'm perfectly comfortable with my sexuality thanks.

The worlds greatest example of the lady protesteth too much. You are a clearly a chutney ferret of truly gargantuan proportions.

[dmitsi]

Mr Gearchange said:

Brother D said:

NoNeed said:

M@H said:

LukeBird said:

Brother D said:

Well, with a guy yeah fine, no boner issues. Except I have an aversion (strong) to having any guys touching me. (Must have been the all boys school thing).
P.s. Have to add, I'm not homophobic.
P.p.s Also more gay guys the better as far as I'm concerned. Improves the guy/girl ratio, can't get my head round guys that are completely homophobic. I've met a lot of gay guys, and in my experience if they were in the market the pool of girls would be significantly reduced. -Anyway back to the thread.

O/T but you sound like a bender.

P.S. Really

P.P.S. Really.

I was going to say that


Now which closet is he in?

Meh - I'm perfectly comfortable with my sexuality thanks.

The worlds greatest example of the lady protesteth too much. You are a clearly a chutney ferret of truly gargantuan proportions.

Had a gay friend read this thread, he agrees with the others. You're a homo.

[Plotloss]

Remember to ask for the happy finish.

You'll love it, I'm sure.

[isee]

So nobody had a boner when getting a massage?
I'd really like to know the protocol. I felt mine swell up once but my GF was in the room so i quickly thought about the massive fallout i would get if it was noticed and things calmed down.

[Jonny671]

Is it Friday?

This is definitely a Friday thread.

[Rude-boy]

If you happen to get a lob on you must be one very sick puppy as, as others have said, a proper massage is not exactly titilating. Even when they are mm away from your plumbs the only thing i tend to think about is "FFS don't hurt those to!"

[louiebaby]

308mate said:

Parsnip said:

funkyrobot said:

Parsnip said:

ewenm said:

The sports massages I have are far too painful for any other reaction to happen.

Correct.

The physio I use is a South African bloke with finger like sausages - have reflexively swore at him more than once "oooh ya fker" etc. Even if it was a blonde stunner doing it, the sheer pain involved would put the little fella off his game so to speak.

Edited by Parsnip on Wednesday 11th August 22:01

Cumberland?

Nah, Edinburgh.

Same guy the Hearts football team go to, but I don't let that put me off.

Not Lincolnshire then?

Can we get a Whoosh Parrot over here please...

[Rude-boy]

anonymous said:

[redacted]

Piece of piss. Guess you never had detention at school

[Parsnip]

308mate said:

Parsnip said:

funkyrobot said:

Parsnip said:

ewenm said:

The sports massages I have are far too painful for any other reaction to happen.

Correct.

The physio I use is a South African bloke with finger like sausages - have reflexively swore at him more than once "oooh ya fker" etc. Even if it was a blonde stunner doing it, the sheer pain involved would put the little fella off his game so to speak.

Edited by Parsnip on Wednesday 11th August 22:01

Cumberland?

Nah, Edinburgh.

Same guy the Hearts football team go to, but I don't let that put me off.

Not Lincolnshire then?

It is definitely the wurst pain I have voluntarily subjected myself to

[Davi]

My old neighbour was a doctor. A very attractive doctor. She carries a very heavy pen that she "bops" on the helmet if such an occurrence happens during an examination

[T84]

Davi said:

My old neighbour was a doctor. A very attractive doctor. She carries a very heavy pen that she "bops" on the helmet if such an occurrence happens during an examination

LMFAO

[ShadownINja]

Davi said:

My old neighbour was a doctor. A very attractive doctor. She carries a very heavy pen that she "bops" on the helmet if such an occurrence happens during an examination

It does beg the question... did you get a lot of examinations by your attractive neighbour?

[cazzer]

Spose it depends on the masseuse.

I had been injured in a car accident. Broken sternum (seat belt injuries).
While on the gurney at the A&E the very pretty young doctor lady had to examine me for a possible hernia....
......
......
"Well at least we know that still works" She said.

Bless her

[Digger]

Davi said:

My old neighbour was a doctor. A very attractive doctor. She carries a very heavy pen that she "bops" on the helmet if such an occurrence happens during an examination

Testing the funny boner. . .?

[mattdaniels]

SWMBO is a qualified masseuse and does Swedish massage which is great. But she is now studying for sports massage and there is NFW she's getting her hands on me to do that. Too painful.

[Cas_P]

Being female I don't have this problem. However I posed this question to the girl who does my sports massages, and asked if it was weird if guys ever did have that problem and she said she just ignores it as it is bound to happen with most men. Unless you're getting a sports massage then I wouldn't worry, it'll hurt too much for you to be thinking about anything else.

On the other hand OP is this you? http://www.topix.com/forum/topstories/T9ATV44UTOTT...

[nonuts]

Cas_P said:

On the other hand OP is this you? http://www.topix.com/forum/topstories/T9ATV44UTOTT...

Why am I not surprised you found that?

[Cas_P]

nonuts said:

Cas_P said:

On the other hand OP is this you? http://www.topix.com/forum/topstories/T9ATV44UTOTT...

Why am I not surprised you found that?

What are you implying sir?

[Pints]

Balmoral Green said:

Brother D said:

whats the protocol if erm, anything erm, pops up accidentally?

Don't they offer additional services (at extra cost) to take care of that sort of thing?

FFS. It's fking rumours like that which result in fkwits calling my Mrs at all hours of the day asking if her massage comes with "additional services" (she's a qualified/professional masseuse).
And yes, she's fking sure the answer's no!