Discussion
GetCarter said:
As English graduates go, Fry is one of the most techie literate blokes out there, one who has always championed tech advancements, and has bought it to an audience that many 'proper' geeks never could.
I'll give you that. However, if he had said "when you fill your car up, you put a nozzle in your car which pumps out air which is replaced with fuel. It then calculates how much to charge you by asking a computer for the size of your fuel tank and deducts that from the amount of air pumped out" then people would call him a complete pillock. And for the non-geeks, that's pretty much the level of wrongness he achieved with his GPS explanation.
GetCarter said:
I've been in the middle of those many times when I didn't say anything like what was reported. Mr Fry is (in his own estimation) 'the worst kind of geek', give him a break... At least 50% of what people are accredited of having said in the press (and on the net) have never once been said.
Except that in this case you can watch the linked episode of QI and see him say it for yourself. It's cringeworthy and, as usual, he spouts his b
ks with pompous authority. This is but one example of crap that comes out of that programme.Anyway, back to the jokes...
Not exactly geeky, but it made me laugh.
A duck walks into a pub and orders a pint of lager and a ham sandwich. The landlord looks at him and says, "But you're a duck"
"I see you're eyes are working" replies the duck.
"And you talk!" exclaims the landlord.
"I see you're ears are working" says the duck, "now can I have my beer and my sandwich please?"
"Certainly," says the landlord, " sorry about that, it's just we don't get many talking ducks in this pub. What are you doing round this way?"
"I'm working on the building site across the road" explains the duck. So the duck drinks his beer, eats his sandwich and leaves. This continues for about 2 weeks. Then one day the circus comes to town.
The ring leader of the circus comes into the pub and the landlord says to him; "You're with the circus aren't you? I know this duck that would be just brilliant in your circus, he talks, drinks beer and everything!"
"Sounds marvellous" says the ringleader, "get him to give me a call."
So the next day, the duck comes into the pub. The landlord says, "Hey Mr Duck. I reckon I can line you up with a top job. Paying really good money!"
"Yeah?" says the duck, "Sounds great, where is it?"
"At the circus" says the landlord.
"The circus?" the duck enquires.
"That's right" replies the landlord.
"The circus? That place with the big tent? With all the animals? With the big canvas roof with the hole in the middle
"That's right!" says the landlord.
The duck looks confused. "What the f
k do they want with a plasterer?"
jtw earlier today
A doctor, a lawyer,and an engineer are sentenced to death. Why is not important to the story...what's important is that the death sentence will be carried out in France - via guillotine.
The doctor is first. The executioner straps him down, hoists the glittering blade aloft, and lets it drop...whereupon it sticks about halfway down.
Now, it's a well-known tradition in capital punishment that if the execution apparatus fails for any reason, this is interpreted as a sign from God, and the death sentence is commuted. Accordingly, the doctor walks away, still very much alive.
The lawyer is next. The executioner straps him down, hoists the glittering blade aloft, and lets it drop...whereupon it sticks in the exact same spot.
Same rules apply...lawyer walks.
The engineer is last. The executioner straps him down, as he hoists the blade aloft, the engineer twists his neck around, peers up at the blade, and says:
"You know, I think I see your trouble there..."
A doctor, a lawyer,and an engineer are sentenced to death. Why is not important to the story...what's important is that the death sentence will be carried out in France - via guillotine.
The doctor is first. The executioner straps him down, hoists the glittering blade aloft, and lets it drop...whereupon it sticks about halfway down.
Now, it's a well-known tradition in capital punishment that if the execution apparatus fails for any reason, this is interpreted as a sign from God, and the death sentence is commuted. Accordingly, the doctor walks away, still very much alive.
The lawyer is next. The executioner straps him down, hoists the glittering blade aloft, and lets it drop...whereupon it sticks in the exact same spot.
Same rules apply...lawyer walks.
The engineer is last. The executioner straps him down, as he hoists the blade aloft, the engineer twists his neck around, peers up at the blade, and says:
"You know, I think I see your trouble there..."
A Mathematician, a Biologist and a Physicist are sitting in a street cafe watching people going in and coming out of the house on the other side of the street.
First they see two people going into the house. Time passes.
After a while they notice three people coming out of the house.
The Physicist: "The measurement wasn't accurate.".
The Biologist: "They have reproduced".
The Mathematician: "If now exactly one person enters the house then it will be empty again."
First they see two people going into the house. Time passes.
After a while they notice three people coming out of the house.
The Physicist: "The measurement wasn't accurate.".
The Biologist: "They have reproduced".
The Mathematician: "If now exactly one person enters the house then it will be empty again."
Gassing Station | The Lounge | Top of Page | What's New | My Stuff