Pistonheaders and their First World Problems.

Pistonheaders and their First World Problems.

Author
Discussion

DickyC

50,117 posts

200 months

Friday 23rd December 2022
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In possession of daughter #1's Vauxhall, I tripped the mileage before a long run as I wanted to compare mpg with my Audi.

The Vauxhall only reads whole miles!

Whole miles! No subtlety at all. No finesse.

Tango13

8,546 posts

178 months

Friday 23rd December 2022
quotequote all
DickyC said:
In possession of daughter #1's Vauxhall, I tripped the mileage before a long run as I wanted to compare mpg with my Audi.

The Vauxhall only reads whole miles!

Whole miles! No subtlety at all. No finesse.
You have two options really...

1, Have the coachman re-trace the route on Google maps to the nearest 0.1 of a mile and calculate accordingly.

2, Burn the Vauxhall back to bare metal before having it shredded and melted down into tins for caviar. Then sell your daughter to a white slave trader as a warning to the rest of you children about the importance of buying a car with a proper trip meter.

DickyC

50,117 posts

200 months

Sunday 25th December 2022
quotequote all
Can't find my Christmas socks.

Any of them! They're probably together somewhere.

Yellow Submarine socks pressed into action to cover the emergency.

I know, i know, but what alternative was there?

Don1

15,974 posts

210 months

Sunday 25th December 2022
quotequote all
DickyC said:
Can't find my Christmas socks.

Any of them! They're probably together somewhere.

Yellow Submarine socks pressed into action to cover the emergency.

I know, i know, but what alternative was there?
Hang your head. Standards must be maintained.

DickyC

50,117 posts

200 months

Sunday 25th December 2022
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Don1 said:
DickyC said:
Can't find my Christmas socks.

Any of them! They're probably together somewhere.

Yellow Submarine socks pressed into action to cover the emergency.

I know, i know, but what alternative was there?
Hang your head. Standards must be maintained.
I can't apologise enough. What alternatives to Beatles' socks could you suggest? My thinking was both Lennon and McCartney released Christmas songs.

Don1

15,974 posts

210 months

Sunday 25th December 2022
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I can’t fault your pop master-esque thinking.

Pistonsquirter

329 posts

41 months

Sunday 25th December 2022
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My new 2-gang outside socket does not have enough sockets for my battery conditioners. I saw this coming to be fair hehe

Nimby

4,667 posts

152 months

Sunday 25th December 2022
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My daughter said her house was so cold last week the extra virgin olive oil solidified.

Road2Ruin

5,293 posts

218 months

Sunday 25th December 2022
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Our Christmas beef Wellington was well done, rather than medium. Heads will roll.

MDMA .

9,030 posts

103 months

Sunday 25th December 2022
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Nimby said:
My daughter said her house was so cold last week the extra virgin olive oil solidified.
Gas supply issue at the Chateau?

mart 63

2,072 posts

246 months

Sunday 25th December 2022
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Went to our local bar for Christmas Dinner today, 1 pigs in blanket, fking 1, atrocious effort.

Chris Type R

8,087 posts

251 months

Monday 26th December 2022
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We've woken up to two fridges rammed with Xmas leftovers and doubt we'll be able to avoid throwing some/most of it away.

talksthetorque

10,815 posts

137 months

Wednesday 28th December 2022
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Chris Type R said:
We've woken up to two fridges rammed with Xmas leftovers and doubt we'll be able to avoid throwing some/most of it away.
Can you create a topic with a wiki page of what's left?
Maybe it can be dispersed charitably to those poor PHers who only have the one car.
























I was going to hell anyway

DickyC

50,117 posts

200 months

Wednesday 28th December 2022
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mart 63 said:
Went to our local bar for Christmas Dinner today, 1 pigs in blanket, fking 1, atrocious effort.
Daughter #1 text to say she'd left me some pigs in blankets in the air fryer. When I got in the fryer had turned itself off. Inside were some charred remains. It was a nice thought. I ate them anyway.

Yex GTR

4,583 posts

222 months

Thursday 29th December 2022
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After the Xmas intake of meat I thought it would be a nice change to have some fresh seafood. Can I find a local place open, no. Did Google help, no. I ended up in Waitrose and spent a lot more than I intended as the choice was excellent and I just wanted everything.

Local suppliers losing out to Supermakets shock.

eldar

21,925 posts

198 months

Thursday 29th December 2022
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Road2Ruin said:
Our Christmas beef Wellington was well done, rather than medium. Heads will roll.
Medium? No wonder competent staff have obviously deserted you. Probably used Heron Foods econo pate, too.

Road2Ruin

5,293 posts

218 months

Thursday 29th December 2022
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eldar said:
Road2Ruin said:
Our Christmas beef Wellington was well done, rather than medium. Heads will roll.
Medium? No wonder competent staff have obviously deserted you. Probably used Heron Foods econo pate, too.
Medium for the wife. She didn't tell me that before we were married!

eldar

21,925 posts

198 months

Thursday 29th December 2022
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Road2Ruin said:
Medium for the wife. She didn't tell me that before we were married!
You have my sympathy. Too late for education, I suspect. Other solutions are available, of course.

21st Century Man

41,135 posts

250 months

Friday 30th December 2022
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DickyC said:
mart 63 said:
Went to our local bar for Christmas Dinner today, 1 pigs in blanket, fking 1, atrocious effort.
Daughter #1 text to say she'd left me some pigs in blankets in the air fryer. When I got in the fryer had turned itself off. Inside were some charred remains. It was a nice thought. I ate them anyway.
Luxury. The only turkey I could find was tiny, precooked and seventy quid from the delicatessen of a swanky department store, so we had two chickens instead. Pigs in blankets were improvised with some American herb & lemon frankfurters and "Bacon slice" from a producer of artisan pork products in Karuizawa. Imagine a hot dog wrapped in sandwich ham. No wonder KFC is a Christmas tradition in Japan.

Don1

15,974 posts

210 months

Saturday 31st December 2022
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More of a life hack - instead of using the bread knife to slice the brioche rolls, one uses the tomato knife.

Same result, less to wash up.