Annoying things people do on trains

Annoying things people do on trains

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Discussion

BrabusMog

20,282 posts

188 months

Monday 21st November 2016
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I'm an aisle seat wker - I'm 6ft5 and I don't like being squashed into the window which is invariably what happens. So if I get an aisle seat I'll take it. If it's a choice of window or stand, I'll stand.

Goaty Bill 2

3,434 posts

121 months

Monday 21st November 2016
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BrabusMog said:
I'm an aisle seat wker - I'm 6ft5 and I don't like being squashed into the window which is invariably what happens. So if I get an aisle seat I'll take it. If it's a choice of window or stand, I'll stand.
Could we request in future, you wear a prominently displayed sign to that effect.
It is quite apparent from earlier posts that it would greatly improve the lives of others smile

I always book an aisle seat when flying.
On one intercontinental journey, feeling particularly pleased with myself for having remembered to make the arrangement, I discovered that our cabin had a stewardess with the widest hips in human history.
"two axe handles wide" as it was measured in my youth.
The young woman would have found it difficult to walk down the aisle of the aircraft even without passengers.
I didn't sleep a wink for the entire journey as her massive buttocks were constantly crashing into my shoulder on every pass through the cabin.

Apologies if that causes an excess of excitement for any readers.



Edited by Goaty Bill 2 on Monday 21st November 08:51

Shakermaker

11,317 posts

102 months

Monday 21st November 2016
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BrabusMog said:
I'm an aisle seat wker - I'm 6ft5 and I don't like being squashed into the window which is invariably what happens. So if I get an aisle seat I'll take it. If it's a choice of window or stand, I'll stand.
I too prefer to stand on the train if there are lots of other people already in the seats, for the same reason. I take up more space when sat down than I do standing up, and if someone else can contort themselves into the space, I'll let them.

walm

10,610 posts

204 months

Monday 21st November 2016
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Goaty Bill 2 said:
Apologies if that causes an excess of excitement for any readers.
I think I will just about be able to restrain myself at the thought of your shoulders, Goaty Bill! wink

Dalto123

3,198 posts

165 months

Monday 21st November 2016
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downthepub said:
On the Feltham -> Richmond SWT service, a builder bloke would get on the 5.something pm service with his extremely muddy full size non-folding bike. Full size bikes are irritating at the best of times... That wasn't cool at all. He's disappeared now, thankfully.
I think more than likely that was the chap who was on my train last Wednesday when I got on at Twickenham (fast service to Waterloo via Richmond). Train was absolutely rammed, and people were really not happy about his bike being there.

Dr Murdoch

3,484 posts

137 months

Monday 21st November 2016
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Dalto123 said:
I think more than likely that was the chap who was on my train last Wednesday when I got on at Twickenham (fast service to Waterloo via Richmond). Train was absolutely rammed, and people were really not happy about his bike being there.
I bet there was some seriously aggressive tutting occurring on that train...


Dalto123

3,198 posts

165 months

Monday 21st November 2016
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Dr Murdoch said:
I bet there was some seriously aggressive tutting occurring on that train...
hehe plenty. We certainly know how to verbalise our displeasure here.

Cotty

39,754 posts

286 months

Monday 21st November 2016
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Girl sitting next to me constantly moving and bumping into my arm, as she kept diving into her handbag to find the next product to apply the next layer of a never ending layer of makeup

_Neal_

2,695 posts

221 months

Monday 21st November 2016
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Flip Martian said:
creampuff said:
I really hate those s at South West Trains. They are always finding new ways to mess it up. But last summer they even found a way to mess up that I had to hand it to them: in the world of making life unpleasant for your customers, this was really innovative.

On one of those baking hot summer days when it was 30 degrees, in a train with non-opening windows, did they have the air-con on? No, instead they turned on the heater.
I suspect that kind of thing happens just because the train staff REALLY hate the miserable moaning gits who travel on their trains laugh
biggrin was having the exact same discussion at work the other day and we reached the same conclusion! Ditto turning the heating off when it's freezing. Although as a counterpoint I did once ask a driver on Southeastern if he could put the heating on (he was walking through the carriage, I didn't knock on the door!) and he spent a couple of minutes sorting it, and was pleasant whilst he did.

To be clear, I've no real issue with Aisle Seat wkers, you can sit where you like, obviously - just don't put your bag on the other seat when it's a busy train, and be friendly and pleasant if/when people ask to sit in the window seat next to you, rather than acting like you're being badly put out by the request.

Flip Martian

19,816 posts

192 months

Monday 21st November 2016
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Dalto123 said:
Dr Murdoch said:
I bet there was some seriously aggressive tutting occurring on that train...
hehe plenty. We certainly know how to verbalise our displeasure here.
rofl Does sum up the British, that does.

John D.

18,073 posts

211 months

Monday 21st November 2016
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I'm an aisle seat wker too wavey

I like having more space for my legs. Never put my bag on the window seat mind - I'm not one of them!

Uncle John

4,347 posts

193 months

Monday 21st November 2016
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Had a good one the other day. For my sins I have to travel into London on Southern, which as you should know, has resembled a chimps tea party for the last year.

To make things a micron more pleasurable I get first class, which on Southern, means you are more, but not always likely to get a seat.

So a French lady I think, is sometimes in the carriage....

She is a bit odd, tuts & hisses a lot, probably about 40 years old, wears designer looking gear & big shades whatever the weather. Reminds me a bit of Absolutely Fabulous. In a nutshell she generally acts like she's better than everyone else.

So the other day I sit opposite, she tuts & hisses, gets up & moves seats. I sarcastically laughed as she did.

This day of all days we had a guard check tickets, a real blue moon on Southern, & lo & behold she did not have a ticket. It was a sweet moment as she got ignominiously moved out of the carriage... Silly cow!


NDA

21,775 posts

227 months

Tuesday 22nd November 2016
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Uncle John said:
This day of all days we had a guard check tickets, a real blue moon on Southern, & lo & behold she did not have a ticket. It was a sweet moment as she got ignominiously moved out of the carriage... Silly cow!
I get such pleasure from this type of event too.

I need to get out more. smile

anonymous-user

56 months

Tuesday 29th November 2016
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Ah, it's winter so those people who don't bother to take their coats off before sitting down. Much better to take up half the seat of the poor sod sitting next to you.

Oh, and smelly breath. Why to people on trains have such poor oral hygiene? frown

BrabusMog

20,282 posts

188 months

Tuesday 29th November 2016
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wormus said:
Ah, it's winter so those people who don't bother to take their coats off before sitting down. Much better to take up half the seat of the poor sod sitting next to you.

Oh, and smelly breath. Why to people on trains have such poor oral hygiene? frown
I think the smelly breath is from people drinking coffees and eating whatever in the morning. That and smokers. I can't stand the smell of smokers in the morning, especially when it's cold like today. Which is why I drive unless I'm going right into the City or Docklands as I'd rather sit in traffic.

Cotty

39,754 posts

286 months

Tuesday 29th November 2016
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Why is it people feel the need to chat solidly for the entire journey. fk sake read a paper and shut up.

Monkeylegend

26,684 posts

233 months

Tuesday 29th November 2016
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John D. said:
I'm an aisle seat wker too wavey

You could at least do it in the toilet you dirty b*****d.

hurstg01

2,925 posts

245 months

Tuesday 29th November 2016
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Cotty said:
Why is it people feel the need to chat solidly for the entire journey. fk sake read a paper and shut up.
On one early cold morning train journey from my station through Woking to Waterloo last year, I remember the Conductor raising the spirits of the quiet, non-descript carriages on my commute by asking “if anyone notices anything untoward, out of the ordinary, out of place on this train, such as a left bag or people god-forbid SMILING, please bring it to my attention immediately so can take care of the situation at the earliest opportunity”

Made a few people look up from their papers / phones / tablets and chuckle


Shakermaker

11,317 posts

102 months

Tuesday 29th November 2016
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NDA said:
Uncle John said:
This day of all days we had a guard check tickets, a real blue moon on Southern, & lo & behold she did not have a ticket. It was a sweet moment as she got ignominiously moved out of the carriage... Silly cow!
I get such pleasure from this type of event too.

I need to get out more. smile
On Friday evening when I was taking the train up towards London, I was most displeased with the group of teenage girls who decided to take over the First Class area, which despite it being behind a door, all we could hear for the part of the journey whilst they were on the train was their council accents and every other word is a swear word and every other word from that is "y'know" or "like"

Annoyingly they got off before the conductor had made his way to our carriage to kick them off, but thankfully they did get off.

anonymous-user

56 months

Tuesday 29th November 2016
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Shakermaker said:
Annoyingly they got off before the conductor had made his way to our carriage to kick them off, but thankfully they did get off.
I trust you looked over the top of your spectacles, tutted loudly, shook your news paper in displeasure.