Match.com (Vol. 7)
Discussion
Rh14n said:
As a female I can agree that this is indeed the secret. I always find that a 5/10 man who can make me laugh is a million times more attractive than a 9/10 man who can't. 
I think I have said this before, but my girlfriend used to work with someone who was approached to go on the Australian version of the Batchelor. Going out for drinks with him was always an experience and an insight into what it must be like to be a 9+/10 male.From the brief observation of him it must be pretty f
king amazing to be honest, and given the choice I would be a humourless 9/10 than a funny 5/10 any day.He would always know the coolest places to go and they were always full of men exactly like him and the hottest women. We would be sitting down, having a drink and some utterly stunning girl would just come over and sit down next to him and start chatting to him.
Walking around, if some stunningly hot girl was approaching he would more often than not know them and had usually slept with them.
If my girlfriend was out having work drinks and she bumped into her friends they would without fail always ask her "Who is that?".
It's is an exclusive clique of all of the hot men and women, they all know each other and they are all sleeping with each other.
As I said, I would rather be a 9/10 any day.
Joey Deacon said:
I think I have said this before, but my girlfriend used to work with someone who was approached to go on the Australian version of the Batchelor. Going out for drinks with him was always an experience and an insight into what it must be like to be a 9+/10 male.
From the brief observation of him it must be pretty fking amazing to be honest, and given the choice I would be a humourless 9/10 than a funny 5/10 any day.
He would always know the coolest places to go and they were always full of men exactly like him and the hottest women. We would be sitting down, having a drink and some utterly stunning girl would just come over and sit down next to him and start chatting to him.
Walking around, if some stunningly hot girl was approaching he would more often than not know them and had usually slept with them.
If my girlfriend was out having work drinks and she bumped into her friends they would without fail always ask her "Who is that?".
It's is an exclusive clique of all of the hot men and women, they all know each other and they are all sleeping with each other.
As I said, I would rather be a 9/10 any day.
Younger lad I used to train with had that Dave Gandy look, he was a royal marine, 6'4" and super fit, not just a bulky roider. He was often away for months but when home a bunch of us used to go out into town for a few beers, within seconds of us entering a bar the girls would start circling, they would be lining up to try to catch his eye, he was actually useless at chatting them up but they were happy to do all the work regardless.From the brief observation of him it must be pretty f
king amazing to be honest, and given the choice I would be a humourless 9/10 than a funny 5/10 any day.He would always know the coolest places to go and they were always full of men exactly like him and the hottest women. We would be sitting down, having a drink and some utterly stunning girl would just come over and sit down next to him and start chatting to him.
Walking around, if some stunningly hot girl was approaching he would more often than not know them and had usually slept with them.
If my girlfriend was out having work drinks and she bumped into her friends they would without fail always ask her "Who is that?".
It's is an exclusive clique of all of the hot men and women, they all know each other and they are all sleeping with each other.
As I said, I would rather be a 9/10 any day.
He can never hold down a long term relationship though, as the temptation is put in front of him 24/7 and he is only human.
Funny thing is when he was away on tour, the girls in training who would never give me a second look would happen to walk across my path. then start a conversation, every time it ended with " so where is your training buddy these days, not seen him for a while"
PAUL.S. said:
Younger lad I used to train with had that Dave Gandy look, he was a royal marine, 6'4" and super fit, not just a bulky roider. He was often away for months but when home a bunch of us used to go out into town for a few beers, within seconds of us entering a bar the girls would start circling, they would be lining up to try to catch his eye, he was actually useless at chatting them up but they were happy to do all the work regardless.
He can never hold down a long term relationship though, as the temptation is put in front of him 24/7 and he is only human.
Funny thing is when he was away on tour, the girls in training who would never give me a second look would happen to walk across my path. then start a conversation, every time it ended with " so where is your training buddy these days, not seen him for a while"
Used to be in the Marines myself and found it a proper marmite occupation but to add extra marmite I've been bald since I was 18ish. I was in LTR all the time I was in so wish I could turn back the clock to my early years when I was based in Plymouth to be a camp orphan and take part in some wretchy weekends. He can never hold down a long term relationship though, as the temptation is put in front of him 24/7 and he is only human.
Funny thing is when he was away on tour, the girls in training who would never give me a second look would happen to walk across my path. then start a conversation, every time it ended with " so where is your training buddy these days, not seen him for a while"
When I meet I get told I look better in person but hate having my pic taken so my selfies are normally s
te. In the Navy now and can pull off some decent ones in uniform wearing my beret but that's a bit cringe and probbaly puts off half the famales OLD. Pre baldness I used to get told I looked like Prince William during his handsome phase but now I'm more Edward so would like my hair back to go with my decent attitude!
Anyway off to spend the night and tomorrow with a girl 9 years my junior who's great in bed. She's a bit jittery and has some confidence issues which gives me mixed emotions about it all.
PAUL.S. said:
He can never hold down a long term relationship though, as the temptation is put in front of him 24/7 and he is only human.
This is the big dating issue for a lot of women, they want these sort of men but obviously these type of men are in such high demand that they can have their pick and will never commit to anyone. The women get to their early 30s, see their friends doing the whole marriage/kids thing and want the same. This is when they start to lower their standards and start looking at the more stable (i.e boring) men they would not have looked twice at when they were in their 20s. The majority of the never married women in their later 30s never made this compromise and still believe the Channing Tatum look alike with a high paid job, lovely house and great abs is still out there for them. These are the women that you see who still have profiles (usually with the same pic) when you go back on the dating sites after being off them for years. Eventually they will post things such as "Where did alll the good men go?" Answer, they are in your 20s where you left them.
PAUL.S. said:
Funny thing is when he was away on tour, the girls in training who would never give me a second look would happen to walk across my path. then start a conversation, every time it ended with " so where is your training buddy these days, not seen him for a while"
Proof it it was needed of Briffault's Law. I have had similar at work before, women who barely know I exist at work will come over and start chatting to me and asking me how I am. Surprise, surprise a few days later I learn I am working on one of their projects.........number2 said:
Between 2011 - 2013, I used online dating. Was looking for a relationship and joined e-harmony. Marketing pulled me in - must have done - but my view was that if one has to pay for it, there will be more serious people on there. A barrier to entry so to speak. I mean, £30 a month is hardly breaking the bank, but still.
Worked well for me. I liked the fact that they only sent through a few matches a day.
This was exactly my thinking. You have to find the right tool for the job - with the plethora of free and low-cost sites available, I hoped anyone willing to pay a decent amount of money to be on there would be looking for similar to me.Worked well for me. I liked the fact that they only sent through a few matches a day.
CharlesdeGaulle said:
Blown2CV said:
LukeBrown66 said:
OK, so why be so OTT nasty, I dont mind per se, but a bit unnecessary. I was merely posting about how much a site has changed, no need for personality dismembership! Anyhoo
Can you tell me specifically where I was nastyk he’s on about?Silverage said:
This was exactly my thinking. You have to find the right tool for the job - with the plethora of free and low-cost sites available, I hoped anyone willing to pay a decent amount of money to be on there would be looking for similar to me.
Lots of smoke and mirrors in that game though.Back in 2018 I was on match and got a message from a girl, with a link to a high end matchmaking service asking me to take a look, I replied saying its not for me, however she then messaged back asking if I would be interested in being on their database as an associate member at no cost.
I figured it was a scam but she asked me to ring her on the website number and to ask for her.
I was curious, so eventually did so, it turned out they charged mainly women, a large sum of money for specialist match making. I would not be able to search their database, but if my profile was of interest to their clients they would then send me their details, if I was happy to meet then they made the arrangements.
I thought what the hell and about once a month they contacted me with such, I met a few of them, mainly career girl types, who got rather pissed off when they discovered they could have found my profile for free on match!
Most of them were hard work, I think there were very few guys in my area being made available to them. I sacked it off in the end. I believe it was over a grand for 6 months membership.
So these exclusive places are not that exclusive.
Just back from a very pleasant brunch date, let's see if anything comes of it. Decided to go as the other girl is still silent.
Afternoon All,
Long time lurker of this thread purely out of interest due to never having the need for OLD. However, the opportunity to give it a go was thrust upon me when my 24 year relationship came to a crashing end.
Not having much luck at the moment, getting very little response at all.
Any tips on what to and not to do?
Where's the best place to start my OLD adventure?
Long time lurker of this thread purely out of interest due to never having the need for OLD. However, the opportunity to give it a go was thrust upon me when my 24 year relationship came to a crashing end.
Not having much luck at the moment, getting very little response at all.
Any tips on what to and not to do?
Where's the best place to start my OLD adventure?
microgod said:
Afternoon All,
Not having much luck at the moment, getting very little response at all.
Any tips on what to and not to do?
Unfortunately the best advice I can give is Not having much luck at the moment, getting very little response at all.
Any tips on what to and not to do?
What to do = Be good looking
What not to do = Be ugly
Online dating is tailored towards women, any woman who is even remotely OK will be inundated by messages. Unfortunately it's the ultimate in window shopping and the only way you are going to stand out is having good photos.
If you are a seven out of ten or above looks wise and can string a sentence together than this definitely gives you a massive advantage over the majority of men on these sites. Also being close to 6ft definitely helps, even if a woman is 5ft tall they still expect a man to be 6ft (despite only about 15% of men being 6ft and above)
Also don't come across as clingy or desperate, this becomes easier the more irons you have in the fire. I actually found with the women I wasn't that bothered about they ended up doing the chasing and were impossible to get rid of. Ironically the ones you actually like and you put a bit more effort into are the ones who tend to suddenly ghost you for no reason at all.
I found being flirty early on usually worked, start early on in the conversation as a test and if they reciprocate push it a bit more. Suggest swapping numbers as soon as possible, once you get off the apps it becomes easier. Arrange to meet as soon as you can, don't let it drag on for weeks and weeks.
Dress well and be well groomed, don't turn up in trainers and a Pink Floyd T shirt. Don't book dinner, just go for drinks instead that way if it is awkward you can bail, if it is going well you can then suggest getting something to eat.
The more dates and success you have the more confident you will get and this makes the whole process a lot easier. As I said earlier, giving off an air of having multiple options and not being desperate works and this gets easier if you know you do actually have other options.
I do not think I could have written the above any better, spot on.
Key thing is do not take the lack of interest personally, its just like cold calling in the sales game, the results are minimal for the amount of effort required.
Try not to think like a man when putting your profile together, have a trusted female give you tips.
Its said time and again, but it is a numbers game, you have to put the legwork in to get any form of success.
Having said all that, my strike rate over the years has been far better via OLD than the real world.
Last message from the Bulgarian was a few days ago, and mainly more waffle, however second date lined up for this weekend with the girl I met on Sunday.
Key thing is do not take the lack of interest personally, its just like cold calling in the sales game, the results are minimal for the amount of effort required.
Try not to think like a man when putting your profile together, have a trusted female give you tips.
Its said time and again, but it is a numbers game, you have to put the legwork in to get any form of success.
Having said all that, my strike rate over the years has been far better via OLD than the real world.
Last message from the Bulgarian was a few days ago, and mainly more waffle, however second date lined up for this weekend with the girl I met on Sunday.
My tu’penneth worth, depends what you’re looking for, one nighters, FWB, just lower your standards (looks wise)and hope she chats well and talk her into a date. Life partner? If my current relationship goes down the pan I’m not sure I’ll turn to OLD tbh, I’d use it for the above whilst waiting to meet someone in RL
online dating isn't biased towards women... it's the whole sexuality of humans (certainly hetero variants thereof) which is biased towards women. Women have power because men hand them it. If we as males just stopped being such utter losers and messaging any dump truck with a pulse telling her she's the most beautiful woman in the world copy/paste then surprisingly women wouldn't get a million fking messages a day and wouldn't waltz around genuinely believing their 5/10 appearance is 11/10. Men are the buyers and woman are the sellers, and it's a strong sellers' market.... but if only there was a way to collectively agree amongst menkind to just pack it in... well onlyfans would go bust for a start.
king messages a day and wouldn't waltz around genuinely believing their 5/10 appearance is 11/10. Men are the buyers and woman are the sellers, and it's a strong sellers' market.... but if only there was a way to collectively agree amongst menkind to just pack it in... well onlyfans would go bust for a start. 2CV’s post is spot on and made me genuinely laugh. My OLD wasn’t quite a dump truck but was everything I wouldn’t look at twice as a rule, very tall (not as me but I like shorties), black hair when I usually go for blondes, size 12 ish which I wouldn’t usually “entertain “. Had two fantastic weekends away and called it a day because of the distance and that I’d met, in RL, a dark haired, quite tall size 12. Meet someone out of your usual spectrum of fanciable and see how it goes. Sorry about your end of relationship btw, I hope you have fun finding the next one(s)
ETA As posted earlier, if you can have a laugh in a chat you’re halfway there IMO
ETA As posted earlier, if you can have a laugh in a chat you’re halfway there IMO
Abdul Abulbul Amir said:
Women are the gatekeepers for sex and men for relationships. Which is why you get lots of chaps complaining of getting no matches and lots of women that are continually on and off the apps.
it's only like that because we prostrate ourselves at their feet in our droves. I've no idea why we do it as we are overall very undiscerning about our partners at the outset, ignoring red flags, and in many cases putting up with all manner of horrific bullst during the relationship, and then when we end up breaking up, we stand to have vast amounts more to lose than the woman. It's only once a woman has had kids, taken the divorce settlement and ruined a man's life that any subsequent potential suitor would go ohhh best stay away from that one, phew dodged a bullet! It's a bit brainless. Maybe we need to be more discerning up front, esp considering we all agree that 103% of women are fking mental stshows. st women deserve to remain single. Know your worth Kings!! Gassing Station | The Lounge | Top of Page | What's New | My Stuff