Classic from the Mrs! Vol 2

[stuttgartmetal]

A drill and bit costs less than thirty quid from machine mart

[bobtail4x4]

tonight changing the panhard rod bushes on the defender,
new bush in either end and the bolt wont line up, ( probably as I moved the car) asked mrs Bob to wiggle the steering wheel to line it up,
bolt into bracket through bush and..... she had bugged off as I said "its in hold it there"
no it was in the first part had to go get her to wiggle wheel again, to line holes up.

[CanAm]

She's talking about possible travel abroad, "We've got countries that are classed as green or amber. What's the other class?"

'Have a guess my dear.' (Before you ask, she's been a driver for 40 years)

[s2kjock]

This morning:

"Since when did VAT go up from 17.5% to 20%?"

[How u doing]

s2kjock said:

This morning:

Since when did VAT go up from 17.5% to 20%?

No, not this morning its been like that since 2011, not for everything mind.

Keep up at the back.

[s2kjock]

Picture round now.

I returned home to be advised:

"I have been cleaning and hoovering"

Me - "Very good, thanks"

OH - "But your handheld rechargeable vacuum cleaner is a bit cr@p - it just seems to blow dust about and not actually pick anything up"

Me - "Mmm - maybe it needs emptied or filters cleaned or something"

OH - "Well I have put it on the floor in the sitting room and you can have a look at it"

[Caddyshack]

You don’t see many VHS players anymore.

[Pagey430]

our rechargeable vac also spreads fine dust particles which you can clearly see floating in a sun lit room, really puts me of using it if I'm honest, okay for little bits of cat food on the kitchen floor but not much else, in my view, your OH may have a good point... ?

[Stan the Bat]

Caddyshack said:

You don’t see many VHS players anymore.

He's got the modern stuff underneath to support it .

[How u doing]

s2kjock said:

Picture round now.

I returned home to be advised:

"I have been cleaning and hoovering"

Me - "Very good, thanks"

OH - "But your handheld rechargeable vacuum cleaner is a bit cr@p - it just seems to blow dust about and not actually pick anything up"

Me - "Mmm - maybe it needs emptied or filters cleaned or something"

OH - "Well I have put it on the floor in the sitting room and you can have a look at it"

You'll have to fill us in, apart from the VHS already mentioned what's wrong?

[stevensdrs]

s2kjock said:

Picture round now.

I returned home to be advised:

"I have been cleaning and hoovering"

Me - "Very good, thanks"

OH - "But your handheld rechargeable vacuum cleaner is a bit cr@p - it just seems to blow dust about and not actually pick anything up"

Me - "Mmm - maybe it needs emptied or filters cleaned or something"

OH - "Well I have put it on the floor in the sitting room and you can have a look at it"

Haha. Who has the cannister then? I have one of these, it's great for doing the stairs but far too technical for her indoors.

[s2kjock]

How u doing said:

You'll have to fill us in, apart from the VHS already mentioned what's wrong?

[Caddyshack]

Stan the Bat said:

Caddyshack said:

You don’t see many VHS players anymore.

He's got the modern stuff underneath to support it .

Yeah, shameless post "look at my home cinema stack setup" big show off.

[How u doing]

s2kjock said:

How u doing said:

You'll have to fill us in, apart from the VHS already mentioned what's wrong?

Ahh I see, the VHS was the problem.

[Slippydiff]

As we head back down the same dual carriageway we’ve just arrived at the roundabout from ...

Her : “The problem is the signposts aren’t very good”

Me : “You’re using Waze, either listen to the instructions or look at the screen and count the amount of exits as per the screen”

Her : “I can’t count the exits”

Me : “You’re a f*cking” accountant”

Her : “I count numbers not exits”

As we’re on the topic of female drivers,
what’s with the “pulsing” throttle pedal action ?
I’ve experienced this with numerous female drivers, seemingly an inability to maintain constant pressure on the throttle pedal ??
And why is the brake pedal used as a binary switch, rather than modulated ??

Sorry for asking

[Caddyshack]

Slippydiff said:

As we head back down the same dual carriageway we’ve just arrived at the roundabout from ...


As we’re on the topic of female drivers,
what’s with the “pulsing” throttle pedal action ?
I’ve experienced this with numerous female drivers, seemingly an inability to maintain constant pressure on the throttle pedal ??
And why is the brake pedal used as a binary switch, rather than modulated ??

Sorry for asking

I tried for years to teach my mum to be a more smooth driver for safety in low grip conditions…she could not grasp the concept. I am now reaching my 12 yr old daughter, she is good at reversing on the mirrors but the brakes are very much on or off at the moment, this is fine in the Twizy but in the 2 tonne+ Range rover it does show up. (On private land)

[Slippydiff]

Caddyshack said:

I tried for years to teach my mum to be a more smooth driver for safety in low grip conditions…she could not grasp the concept. I am now reaching my 12 yr old daughter, she is good at reversing on the mirrors but the brakes are very much on or off at the moment, this is fine in the Twizy but in the 2 tonne+ Range rover it does show up. (On private land)

I can completely understand it if someone is inexperienced behind the wheel, but my other half is a seasoned campaigner. Regrettably she "suffers" from two afflictions behind the wheel, impatience and over-confidence. I find her driving shows up in two places, my neck and my heart rate

[How u doing]

Slippydiff said:

Caddyshack said:

I tried for years to teach my mum to be a more smooth driver for safety in low grip conditions…she could not grasp the concept. I am now reaching my 12 yr old daughter, she is good at reversing on the mirrors but the brakes are very much on or off at the moment, this is fine in the Twizy but in the 2 tonne+ Range rover it does show up. (On private land)

I can completely understand it if someone is inexperienced behind the wheel, but my other half is a seasoned campaigner. Regrettably she "suffers" from two afflictions behind the wheel, impatience and over-confidence. I find her driving shows up in two places, my neck and my heart rate

I've often wondered if we shouldn't have continued with hand controls. More precise.

[Avenicus]

When working as a buyer for an electronics firm that fixes stuff a long time ago;

Wife - "Can you get me a new remote control for my video?"

Me - "Sure, what does it say on the label - like some numbers or letters?"

Wife - after about five minutes trying to find the remote - "VHS"

Still together....

[Avenicus]

Watching an FA Cup game with my brother and wife where Millwall were playing in the FA Cup, so instead of names on the back of the shirts they had "The Lions" printed on them.

Convinced her that there were the "Thelions triplets" playing for Millwall and the Captain was called Morgan.








Still married.....