PH Secret Santa 2018 - Rogue Custard: A Santae Story!
Discussion
"Package 1 opens, Whererrvr have I seen one of these before, oooooh, it gets quite big when you pull at it, I haven't fondled one this long before. Was it at the dentist, yes, or, oh wit, the coppers looking under cars for boms, don't they use one of these on a long handle". ....t 1:36
"Still at least it looks like I've avoided getting a boroscope and anal lube unlike that orther pure Santee, crap time...".......t 2:03
"Package 2, I'm beginning to see the light"
"Note to self, stop cracking puns, wise up, time is rolling on, more than half way ther" t3-16
"Pack 3 - latex gloves, pack 4 I just know is going to be a lump of sodium and as I drop it into the bucket it is going to fizz everywhere, s
t, why are latex gloves so hard to get on in a rush, are you supposed to blow them, I'm sure that is what one of the fluffers on yesterdays film set said, hmm, perhaps that wasn't gloves, shiot move on time, ermm, fluff, fumble, quick, ermm black and white video for final moments"......t 4:57
https://youtu.be/HY7mTCMvpEM?t=33
Now Stan wasn't in best of health, so this may have been a blessing, His body was entirely charred, to death, apart from curiously two things. 1) A letter set PH tattood on his left buttock (I think it stood for Piles Here so any emergency responders would know to treat his Nobby Stiles as well as any heart attack / arterial bleeding Stan may have been subjected to as a result of his day job stresses and dangers) and in his left hand, partly opened, a totally unmarked tube from present 4...........................spooky! And the final post-it notes "I cut my piles off with a Stanley Knife, that has rectum".
"Still at least it looks like I've avoided getting a boroscope and anal lube unlike that orther pure Santee, crap time...".......t 2:03
"Package 2, I'm beginning to see the light"
"Note to self, stop cracking puns, wise up, time is rolling on, more than half way ther" t3-16
"Pack 3 - latex gloves, pack 4 I just know is going to be a lump of sodium and as I drop it into the bucket it is going to fizz everywhere, s
t, why are latex gloves so hard to get on in a rush, are you supposed to blow them, I'm sure that is what one of the fluffers on yesterdays film set said, hmm, perhaps that wasn't gloves, shiot move on time, ermm, fluff, fumble, quick, ermm black and white video for final moments"......t 4:57https://youtu.be/HY7mTCMvpEM?t=33
Now Stan wasn't in best of health, so this may have been a blessing, His body was entirely charred, to death, apart from curiously two things. 1) A letter set PH tattood on his left buttock (I think it stood for Piles Here so any emergency responders would know to treat his Nobby Stiles as well as any heart attack / arterial bleeding Stan may have been subjected to as a result of his day job stresses and dangers) and in his left hand, partly opened, a totally unmarked tube from present 4...........................spooky! And the final post-it notes "I cut my piles off with a Stanley Knife, that has rectum".
StanleyT, I have no words, I am not even sure what happened 
am I right in thinking you were gifted a mirror, gloves, a stanley knife and hemorrhoid cream?
Also... guys we have a situation, one that I am not certain has happened in years past. We have a recipient who has received nothing and a PHSS I cannot seem to get a response from but who has been active in the forums. So, what do we do?
am I right in thinking you were gifted a mirror, gloves, a stanley knife and hemorrhoid cream? Also... guys we have a situation, one that I am not certain has happened in years past. We have a recipient who has received nothing and a PHSS I cannot seem to get a response from but who has been active in the forums. So, what do we do?
VBRJ obviously.
Or, failing that I’m sure we can whip something together for the poor victim and then victimise the PHSS to within an inch of his life.
It also important to make sure that the Santa in question, assuming he’s just being an antisocial asshat, is never allowed to participate again.
Or, failing that I’m sure we can whip something together for the poor victim and then victimise the PHSS to within an inch of his life.
It also important to make sure that the Santa in question, assuming he’s just being an antisocial asshat, is never allowed to participate again.
geeks said:
Also... guys we have a situation, one that I am not certain has happened in years past. We have a recipient who has received nothing and a PHSS I cannot seem to get a response from but who has been active in the forums. So, what do we do?
Name both parties, we can sort both out respectively... It can be worked out fairly easily...
Not sure I want to name the victim as they might become all nice about it with a "its not a big deal" kind of attitude, which isn't fair. So to that end....
I am looking for 1 willing volunteer to go halves with me, we will each send that person a gift, please PM me if you have a little left over Christmas cheer!
Not sure I want to name the victim as they might become all nice about it with a "its not a big deal" kind of attitude, which isn't fair. So to that end....
I am looking for 1 willing volunteer to go halves with me, we will each send that person a gift, please PM me if you have a little left over Christmas cheer!
geeks said:
StanleyT, I have no words, I am not even sure what happened am I right in thinking you were gifted a mirror, gloves, a stanley knife and hemorrhoid cream?
Also... guys we have a situation, one that I am not certain has happened in years past. We have a recipient who has received nothing and a PHSS I cannot seem to get a response from but who has been active in the forums. So, what do we do?
Apols, just come out of a six day drinking session. Not sure what happen either, but it seems my mate Dave got pissed on New Years Eve, dressed up in my clothes and blew my shed up, confusing my wife, she didn't realise I've been down the pub and elsewhere unknown since New Years Eve afternoon.. am I right in thinking you were gifted a mirror, gloves, a stanley knife and hemorrhoid cream? Also... guys we have a situation, one that I am not certain has happened in years past. We have a recipient who has received nothing and a PHSS I cannot seem to get a response from but who has been active in the forums. So, what do we do?
Strangely, upon my bedside table, there is indeed a mirror, a light, a latex glove and a slightly charred party pack of haemorrhoid cream!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Thanks Santee, here is to next year!
StanleyT said:
Apols, just come out of a six day drinking session. Not sure what happen either, but it seems my mate Dave got pissed on New Years Eve, dressed up in my clothes and blew my shed up, confusing my wife, she didn't realise I've been down the pub and elsewhere unknown since New Years Eve afternoon..
Strangely, upon my bedside table, there is indeed a mirror, a light, a latex glove and a slightly charred party pack of haemorrhoid cream!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Thanks Santee, here is to next year!
They're always named 'Dave' aren't they?!Strangely, upon my bedside table, there is indeed a mirror, a light, a latex glove and a slightly charred party pack of haemorrhoid cream!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Thanks Santee, here is to next year!
geeks said:
It can be worked out fairly easily...
Not sure I want to name the victim as they might become all nice about it with a "its not a big deal" kind of attitude, which isn't fair. So to that end....
I am looking for 1 willing volunteer to go halves with me, we will each send that person a gift, please PM me if you have a little left over Christmas cheer!
If you haven't had any takers I'm in. Not sure I want to name the victim as they might become all nice about it with a "its not a big deal" kind of attitude, which isn't fair. So to that end....
I am looking for 1 willing volunteer to go halves with me, we will each send that person a gift, please PM me if you have a little left over Christmas cheer!
Let me know the details.
OzzyR1 said:
geeks said:
It can be worked out fairly easily...
Not sure I want to name the victim as they might become all nice about it with a "its not a big deal" kind of attitude, which isn't fair. So to that end....
I am looking for 1 willing volunteer to go halves with me, we will each send that person a gift, please PM me if you have a little left over Christmas cheer!
If you haven't had any takers I'm in. Not sure I want to name the victim as they might become all nice about it with a "its not a big deal" kind of attitude, which isn't fair. So to that end....
I am looking for 1 willing volunteer to go halves with me, we will each send that person a gift, please PM me if you have a little left over Christmas cheer!
Let me know the details.
However I would be very happy to PayPal one or both of you a few beer tokens towards the cost of the present? Let me know if you like the idea.
geeks said:
Also... guys we have a situation, one that I am not certain has happened in years past. We have a recipient who has received nothing and a PHSS I cannot seem to get a response from but who has been active in the forums. So, what do we do?
Also happy to contribute something towards cost of something for the recipient who's still waiting.If someone didn't send a parcel, let's take a wholesale catering pack of frozen sausages to their front lawn and give the unfortunate giftee first go with the mallet!
MatBat - My Yodel update...
The seller has refunded me however they are out of pocket as Yodel refuse to take responsibility saying that I signed for the parcel because that's what their system says - Nevermind me having various receipts of being over 200 miles away from the delivery location.
The seller has refunded me however they are out of pocket as Yodel refuse to take responsibility saying that I signed for the parcel because that's what their system says - Nevermind me having various receipts of being over 200 miles away from the delivery location.
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