Sean Connery Joke Thread (Vol 9)
Discussion
A very butch man walks into a bar, and a lady
recognizes him as real Rugby player.
They start to talk, and eventually go back to his place.
They start to kiss, and the man takes off his shirt.
On his arm, he has a tattoo that says REEBOK.
"What's that for?" the lady questions.
"Oh, I have this so that when I'm on TV,
people will see my tattoo, and Reebok pays me."
Then the man takes off his trousers, and on his
leg, he has a tattoo that says NIKE.
'What's that ?' the lady questions again.
"Just like the Reebok tattoo, I get paid
when this tattoo is seen on TV."
Then the man drops his underwear and on his
penis he has a tattoo that says AIDS.
The lady screams: "Don't tell me you have AIDS!"
The man replies: "No, no.....!!! Calm down,"
"It will say ADIDAS in a minute...........!!!"
recognizes him as real Rugby player.
They start to talk, and eventually go back to his place.
They start to kiss, and the man takes off his shirt.
On his arm, he has a tattoo that says REEBOK.
"What's that for?" the lady questions.
"Oh, I have this so that when I'm on TV,
people will see my tattoo, and Reebok pays me."
Then the man takes off his trousers, and on his
leg, he has a tattoo that says NIKE.
'What's that ?' the lady questions again.
"Just like the Reebok tattoo, I get paid
when this tattoo is seen on TV."
Then the man drops his underwear and on his
penis he has a tattoo that says AIDS.
The lady screams: "Don't tell me you have AIDS!"
The man replies: "No, no.....!!! Calm down,"
"It will say ADIDAS in a minute...........!!!"
The Psychiatrist and The Proctologist
Best friends graduated from medical school at the same time and decided that in spite of two different specialties, they would open a practice together to share office space and personnel.
Dr. Smith was the psychiatrist, and Dr. Jones was the proctologist; they put up a sign reading: Dr. Smith and Dr. Jones: Hysterias and Posteriors. The town council was livid and insisted they change it.
The docs changed it to read: Schizoids and Hemorrhoids. This was also not acceptable, so they again changed the sign to read Catatonics and High Colonics - no go.
Next they tried Manic Depressives and Anal Retentives - thumbs down again.
Then came Minds and Behinds - still no good.
Another attempt resulted in Lost Souls and Butt Holes - unacceptable again!
So they tried Nuts and Butts - no way. Freaks and Cheeks - still no good. Loons and Moons - forget it.
Almost at their wit's end, the docs finally came up with:
Dr. Smith and Dr. Jones - Specializing in Odds and Ends.
Best friends graduated from medical school at the same time and decided that in spite of two different specialties, they would open a practice together to share office space and personnel.
Dr. Smith was the psychiatrist, and Dr. Jones was the proctologist; they put up a sign reading: Dr. Smith and Dr. Jones: Hysterias and Posteriors. The town council was livid and insisted they change it.
The docs changed it to read: Schizoids and Hemorrhoids. This was also not acceptable, so they again changed the sign to read Catatonics and High Colonics - no go.
Next they tried Manic Depressives and Anal Retentives - thumbs down again.
Then came Minds and Behinds - still no good.
Another attempt resulted in Lost Souls and Butt Holes - unacceptable again!
So they tried Nuts and Butts - no way. Freaks and Cheeks - still no good. Loons and Moons - forget it.
Almost at their wit's end, the docs finally came up with:
Dr. Smith and Dr. Jones - Specializing in Odds and Ends.
MartG said:
Particularly the interview with his long time friend, and former bandmate, Peter Capaldi when they remember a particularly vivid acid trip together and consider the possibility that they're still on it...
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=i5zhExXiL8A
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