Juvenile things that make you snigger (Vol. 3)
Discussion
Speed 3 said:
ChemicalChaos said:
Anyone else love taking the opportunity to be juvenile with completely plausible deniabilty when at work? 
in our old asset management system it auto-generated names for any new pieces of testing equipment - eg. LT2345
In our new system we can free-name any new stuff we get in.....
So far this year we've had a hot water circulation bath named WET1 (officially WaterBath - Enzymes Testing No.1) and now a temperature probe called HOT1 (officially Heat Observation Tool No.1)
How long before you need a Calibrated Unitary Network Tool ?in our old asset management system it auto-generated names for any new pieces of testing equipment - eg. LT2345
In our new system we can free-name any new stuff we get in.....
So far this year we've had a hot water circulation bath named WET1 (officially WaterBath - Enzymes Testing No.1) and now a temperature probe called HOT1 (officially Heat Observation Tool No.1)
Magnum 475 said:
One of my first projects as an IT PM many, many, many years ago related to upgrading the company's Automated Review system.
I accidentally called the project 'Automated Review System Enhancements'. No-one noticed (not even me at first) what a great acronym this was.
Variable on a graph in a report Vmilf. Non-deliberate, noticed at the time but I thought I'd see if anyone else spotted it.I accidentally called the project 'Automated Review System Enhancements'. No-one noticed (not even me at first) what a great acronym this was.
Peer reviewer did, swizz!
I used to work for an American investment bank. They love to create acronyms for complex financial products (partly for branding): e.g. Liquid Yield Option Note = LYON; Asset Swapped Convertible Option Transaction = ASCOT.
An American colleague designed a new vehicle and explained it to us in some detail. My British boss piped up, with a mischievous glint in his eye, with "So, this is a Medium-term Interest Note Geared to Equity - in other words, a MINGE". I had to chew my tongue to prevent a guffaw. The American was delighted with this new mnemonic. The name lasted about three weeks in the development stage before someone showed it to another Brit. My boss got one of those b0llockings along the lines of "You and I both think this is funny but don't do that again because the Yanks might have actually launched with that".
An American colleague designed a new vehicle and explained it to us in some detail. My British boss piped up, with a mischievous glint in his eye, with "So, this is a Medium-term Interest Note Geared to Equity - in other words, a MINGE". I had to chew my tongue to prevent a guffaw. The American was delighted with this new mnemonic. The name lasted about three weeks in the development stage before someone showed it to another Brit. My boss got one of those b0llockings along the lines of "You and I both think this is funny but don't do that again because the Yanks might have actually launched with that".
AstonZagato said:
I used to work for an American investment bank. They love to create acronyms for complex financial products (partly for branding): e.g. Liquid Yield Option Note = LYON; Asset Swapped Convertible Option Transaction = ASCOT.
An American colleague designed a new vehicle and explained it to us in some detail. My British boss piped up, with a mischievous glint in his eye, with "So, this is a Medium-term Interest Note Geared to Equity - in other words, a MINGE". I had to chew my tongue to prevent a guffaw. The American was delighted with this new mnemonic. The name lasted about three weeks in the development stage before someone showed it to another Brit. My boss got one of those b0llockings along the lines of "You and I both think this is funny but don't do that again because the Yanks might have actually launched with that".
This, from an American High School yearbook, supports that notion of American parochial use of EnglishAn American colleague designed a new vehicle and explained it to us in some detail. My British boss piped up, with a mischievous glint in his eye, with "So, this is a Medium-term Interest Note Geared to Equity - in other words, a MINGE". I had to chew my tongue to prevent a guffaw. The American was delighted with this new mnemonic. The name lasted about three weeks in the development stage before someone showed it to another Brit. My boss got one of those b0llockings along the lines of "You and I both think this is funny but don't do that again because the Yanks might have actually launched with that".
I’ve just created a new juvenile game today and apologies in advance if I’m not the first.
Picked up a courtesy car and was trying to add my phone to the Bluetooth system. It was full of names belonging to the staff and I assume ex customers. When I negotiated the system to delete one to add mine it gave the option to rename them.
The list now reads
Cockhead
Nobody likes you
Useless idiot
Etc etc.
I would love to see the face of the DP or whoever gets in and the car says Cockhead your phone is now connected. I don’t feel bad as I picked the car up with 50miles range.
Picked up a courtesy car and was trying to add my phone to the Bluetooth system. It was full of names belonging to the staff and I assume ex customers. When I negotiated the system to delete one to add mine it gave the option to rename them.
The list now reads
Cockhead
Nobody likes you
Useless idiot
Etc etc.
I would love to see the face of the DP or whoever gets in and the car says Cockhead your phone is now connected. I don’t feel bad as I picked the car up with 50miles range.
Edited by Mikebentley on Wednesday 14th June 18:08
One day in 1995, a large, heavy middle-aged man robbed two Pittsburgh banks in broad daylight. He didn’t wear a mask or any sort of disguise. And he smiled at surveillance cameras before walking out of each bank. Later that night, police arrested a surprised McArthur Wheeler. When they showed him the surveillance tapes, Wheeler stared in disbelief. “But I wore the juice,” he mumbled. Apparently, Wheeler thought that rubbing lemon juice on his skin would render him invisible to videotape cameras. After all, lemon juice is used as invisible ink so, as long as he didn’t come near a heat source, he should have been completely invisible.
Police concluded that Wheeler was not crazy or on drugs—just incredibly mistaken.
https://qz.com/986221/what-know-it-alls-dont-know-...
Police concluded that Wheeler was not crazy or on drugs—just incredibly mistaken.
https://qz.com/986221/what-know-it-alls-dont-know-...
Mikebentley said:
I’ve just created a new juvenile game today and apologies in advance if I’m not the first.
Picked up a courtesy car and was trying to add my phone to the Bluetooth system. It was full of names belonging to the staff and I assume ex customers. When I negotiated the system to delete one to add mine it gave the option to rename them.
The list now reads
Cockhead
Nobody likes you
Useless idiot
Etc etc.
I would love to see the face of the DP or whoever gets in and the car says Cockhead your phone is now connected. I don’t feel bad as I picked the car up with 50miles range.
Would it not need to be the same phone for this to work?Picked up a courtesy car and was trying to add my phone to the Bluetooth system. It was full of names belonging to the staff and I assume ex customers. When I negotiated the system to delete one to add mine it gave the option to rename them.
The list now reads
Cockhead
Nobody likes you
Useless idiot
Etc etc.
I would love to see the face of the DP or whoever gets in and the car says Cockhead your phone is now connected. I don’t feel bad as I picked the car up with 50miles range.
Edited by Mikebentley on Wednesday 14th June 18:08
cobra kid said:
Mikebentley said:
I’ve just created a new juvenile game today and apologies in advance if I’m not the first.
Picked up a courtesy car and was trying to add my phone to the Bluetooth system. It was full of names belonging to the staff and I assume ex customers. When I negotiated the system to delete one to add mine it gave the option to rename them.
The list now reads
Cockhead
Nobody likes you
Useless idiot
Etc etc.
I would love to see the face of the DP or whoever gets in and the car says Cockhead your phone is now connected. I don’t feel bad as I picked the car up with 50miles range.
Would it not need to be the same phone for this to work?Picked up a courtesy car and was trying to add my phone to the Bluetooth system. It was full of names belonging to the staff and I assume ex customers. When I negotiated the system to delete one to add mine it gave the option to rename them.
The list now reads
Cockhead
Nobody likes you
Useless idiot
Etc etc.
I would love to see the face of the DP or whoever gets in and the car says Cockhead your phone is now connected. I don’t feel bad as I picked the car up with 50miles range.
Edited by Mikebentley on Wednesday 14th June 18:08
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