Sean Connery Joke Thread (Vol 9)

[K12beano]

silverfoxcc said:

Vipers said:

A Winner Is You said:

I was about to post a joke about time travel. But none of you found it funny.

I really enjoyed it next year, well done

It was just as funny back in 1715

See!?

it's only 1904 here....

[nonsequitur]

Back to the PHer.

[Hugo a Gogo]

Monkeylegend said:

Or the two gay Irishmen.

Murphy Fitzpatrick and Patrick Fitzmurphy.

does anyone in Ireland have the christian name 'Murphy'?

Not even a common surname, Fitzmurphy, but there's dozens of better possibles you could have used, Fitzwilliam, Fitzmorris etc etc

all-in-all, 1 kitten out of 10

[shed driver]

Or the gay cowboy who enjoyed shooting up the sheriff?

SD.

[tribalsurfer]

Hugo a Gogo said:

does anyone in Ireland have the christian name 'Murphy'?

Not even a common surname, Fitzmurphy, but there's dozens of better possibles you could have used, Fitzwilliam, Fitzmorris etc etc

all-in-all, 1 kitten out of 10

Always used to be Gerald Fitzoatrick and Patrick Fitzgerald.

Couple of nice gay Indians, Ramit and Jamit

[james-witton]

Or the Indian Karaoke champion: Gerupta Singh.

[SpeckledJim]

james-witton said:

Or the Indian Karaoke champion: Gerupta Singh.

Or his driver: Ariavin Mahiacar

And his Dutch roadie: Salford Van Hire

[RJO]

SpeckledJim said:

Or his driver: Ariavin Mahiacar

And his Dutch roadie: Salford Van Hire

And the Indian at the check in...Mahatma Coat

[simoid]

RJO said:

And the Indian at the check in...Mahatma Coat

OT - who was it that lost their job over a similar joke? Must’ve been 10+ years ago now. I have a feeling they were in entertainment but not comedy.

[Cotty]

"Son, I don’t think you’re cut out to be a mime."
"Was it something I said?"’ asks the son.
"Yes.'”

[Frank7]

SpeckledJim said:

And his Dutch roadie: Salford Van Hire

I heard that years ago about an alleged dumbo who’d got the Man. U. manager gig.
He wanted to buy Salford Van Hire, he thought he was a Dutch International.

[CanAm]

Hugo a Gogo said:

does anyone in Ireland have the christian name 'Murphy'?

Not even a common surname, Fitzmurphy, but there's dozens of better possibles you could have used, Fitzwilliam, Fitzmorris etc etc

all-in-all, 1 kitten out of 10

The version I heard, many years ago, was Patrick Fitzmichael and Michael Fitzpatrick.

[Evangelion]

RJO said:

And the Indian at the check in...Mahatma Coat

And his Scottish colleague, Angus McCoatup.

[Sticks.]

And Sugar Diabetes, the Welsh boxer.

[Sticks.]

England footballer Danny Welbeck's father, Stan, is a bomb disposal expert.

[awooga]

Or the Indian swimming pool attendant, Didja Handyerbandin.

[simoid]

Chinese farmer: Hu Flung Dung and his pregnant sister, Ful Wum Noo.

[PixelpeepS3]

indian tightrope walker ?

Balan Singh

Indian hot coal walker

Sinjit

[Evangelion]

The Norwegian bartender, Lars Torders.

[LordGrover]

Never thought I's miss puns or Latvian jokes...