Sean Connery Joke Thread (Vol 10ish)

Sean Connery Joke Thread (Vol 10ish)

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vaud

50,759 posts

156 months

Friday 4th February 2022
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V6 Pushfit said:
Wayne Bruce the 3rd ? Either he’s American or he’s Royalty.
3rd indicates that he isn't a direct or secondary contact from my linkedin connections.

anonymous-user

55 months

Friday 4th February 2022
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vaud said:
V6 Pushfit said:
Wayne Bruce the 3rd ? Either he’s American or he’s Royalty.
3rd indicates that he isn't a direct or secondary contact from my linkedin connections.
Don’t ruin it.

He looks like an American.

vaud

50,759 posts

156 months

Friday 4th February 2022
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"Brad, short for bradawl - small boring tool"

Love this one.

Jasandjules

70,009 posts

230 months

Friday 4th February 2022
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We used to call a guy POD> Profit of Doom.

glenrobbo

35,397 posts

151 months

Friday 4th February 2022
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Jasandjules said:
We used to call a guy POD> Profit of Doom.
Do you mean like the Wages of Sin? biggrin

Jasandjules

70,009 posts

230 months

Friday 4th February 2022
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glenrobbo said:
Jasandjules said:
We used to call a guy POD> Profit of Doom.
Do you mean like the Wages of Sin? biggrin
Sadly nothing so interesting.

Doofus

26,041 posts

174 months

Friday 4th February 2022
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Jasandjules said:
glenrobbo said:
Jasandjules said:
We used to call a guy POD> Profit of Doom.
Do you mean like the Wages of Sin? biggrin
Sadly nothing so interesting.
Prophet?

Jasandjules

70,009 posts

230 months

Friday 4th February 2022
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Doofus said:
Prophet?
Well, insofar as he predicted everything would fail, go wrong etc then yes I suppose.... I should add this was in a bank so it was "funny" to write "Profit" of Doom in messages etc....

sly fox

2,232 posts

220 months

Friday 4th February 2022
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Mastiff said:
Deserved a clap
Am sure that was a Dave Allen joke? Superb nonetheless.

silverfoxcc

7,709 posts

146 months

Friday 4th February 2022
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We called our bosss's boss The Angel of Death

Her only came into our main office when someone had died. As soon as he walked in the door we did a head count on who wasn't at their desk

Vipers

32,931 posts

229 months

Friday 4th February 2022
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An Arab sheikh was admitted to hospital for heart surgery, he had a very rare blood type and the local blood bank had none, some was required in case he needed it during the operation.

As the sheikh had a rare type of blood, and couldn't be found locally, a call went out. Finally a Scotsman was located who had the same blood type. The Scot willingly donated his blood for the Arab.

After the surgery, the Arab sent the Scotsman in appreciation for giving his blood, a new BMW, diamonds and a cheque for £100,000.

A couple of days later, once again, the Arab had to go through a corrective surgery. The hospital telephoned the Scotsman who was more than happy to donate his blood again. After the second surgery, the Arab sent the Scotsman a thank-you card and a box of chocolates.

The Scotsman was shocked that the Arab did not reciprocate his kind gesture as he had anticipated. He phoned the Arab and asked him: "I thought you'd be generous again, that you would give me another BMW, diamonds and money...but you only gave me a thank-you card and a box of chocolates."

To this the Arab replied: "Aye laddie, but I now have Scottish blood in me veins!

Ultra Sound Guy

28,655 posts

195 months

Friday 4th February 2022
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URGENT: looking for reliable tenants for a beautiful building with office on ground floor and a recently decorated flat above.
Having real issues with this property, last two tenants left before their fixed term ended, police always at the door, current tenants constantly hosting parties.
Can offer fixed term tenancy of 4 years, any interest let me know, RENT IS NEGOTIABLE the address is:
10 Downing Street

Trenchard

303 posts

29 months

Friday 4th February 2022
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Trenchard

303 posts

29 months

Friday 4th February 2022
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Archaeologists have finally unearthed documents that verify who led the Pedants Revolt in 1381...

Which Tyler.

Edited by Trenchard on Friday 4th February 20:32

motco

15,992 posts

247 months

Friday 4th February 2022
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Whom Tyler surely?

Caddyshack

10,996 posts

207 months

Friday 4th February 2022
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Trenchard said:
Archaeologists have finally unearhed documents that verify who led the Pedants Revolt in 1381...

Which Tyler.
Unearhed?

Doofus

26,041 posts

174 months

Friday 4th February 2022
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Caddyshack said:
Trenchard said:
Archaeologists have finally unearhed documents that verify who led the Pedants Revolt in 1381...

Which Tyler.
Unearhed?
Wat?

Trenchard

303 posts

29 months

Friday 4th February 2022
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Caddyshack said:
Unearhed?
FTFY

Monkeylegend

26,530 posts

232 months

Friday 4th February 2022
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Caddyshack said:
Trenchard said:
Archaeologists have finally unearhed documents that verify who led the Pedants Revolt in 1381...

Which Tyler.
Unearhed?
I thought it was deliberate to bring the revolting pedants out, but obviously that was too clever.

Trenchard

303 posts

29 months

Friday 4th February 2022
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Monkeylegend said:
I thought it was deliberate to bring the revolting pedants out, but obviously that was too clever.
But nobody likes a smartass.

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