The return of 'Fat chicken kid'.
Discussion
Well, some months ago I started a thread about how horrible other people kids were.
A little reminder
I had the pleasure of Part Deux this weekend.
Same bunch of people (wifes friends), different location. Luckily it wasn't my house that 'fat chicken kid' (let's call him FCK) was gorging his little fat face at. Some other poor b'stard had that pleasure on Saturday afternoon.
Well, we turned up at 3pm and FCK was already there. I spotted him across the garden like a hawk spots a fieldmouse. And similar to the hawk, my every instinct was to rip him limb from limb. This time we had the added bonus that his useless parents had also brought his rancid little sister along. We'll call her Veruca Salt. Anybody having seen "Willy Wonker and the Chocolate factory" will know what a spoilt little st she is.
I digress.
I grabbed myself a cider and thought 'ignore them'. No such luck. My wife dragged me over to say hello and I spent the next hour hearing how FCK and Veruca were "top of their class, wonderful children, nobel peace prize nominees, nuclear physicists, and all round amazing fking human beings".
My inner voice was screaming "like fk they are" but somehow my hypocritical mouth uttered "aaaah, how nice for you" whilst trying to force a bucketload of bile back down my retching gullet.
The best was still to come.
Veruca ran round trying to be the centre of attention all afternoon which was bearable but her bloated brother was the star of the show.
Our wonderful hosts spent most of the afternoon BBQing and making sure everyone was well watered. On announcing that the food was ready FCK ran to the front of the queue and proceeded to shove several other kids & adults out the way. Nice. He then filled his plate with a portion of food that would make V8Mate look like an advert for Anorexia UK.
The disgusting little porkbelly then pushed the mountain of food into his well exercised jaws until most of it was gone before pushing his way to the front again. .
This then continued with desserts and ice creams where he put his hand up for 'seconds'. .
On finishing his food he then demanded that the rest of the kids turn the film off the TV because he wanted to see some other programme that he was missing. The host refused as she thought it best to keep the majority of the kids happy and upon this the spoilt brats parents asked if he could "watch it upstairs" as he "needed to see it". Upon informing the cocksockets that they did not have Sky multi-room he burst into tears and threw himself on the floor.
It was at this point I'd had about 6 drinks and I couldn't hold my anger any longer, so told him to 'man up'. At this, he looked through red, teary eyes, began to sob more and demanded that his mother give him the car keys so he could sit in the car. He then stayed there for the next hour (10/10 for persistance) until upon my departure I gave him a cheery wave and mouthed the words "fking bellend" at him. looking on the plus side, at least sitting in a roasting hot car for an hour may have helped him lose a little weight.
I came to the conclusion that my children are angels and I shall never moan about them again.
Others peoples kids & FCK: s.
A little reminder
I had the pleasure of Part Deux this weekend.
Same bunch of people (wifes friends), different location. Luckily it wasn't my house that 'fat chicken kid' (let's call him FCK) was gorging his little fat face at. Some other poor b'stard had that pleasure on Saturday afternoon.
Well, we turned up at 3pm and FCK was already there. I spotted him across the garden like a hawk spots a fieldmouse. And similar to the hawk, my every instinct was to rip him limb from limb. This time we had the added bonus that his useless parents had also brought his rancid little sister along. We'll call her Veruca Salt. Anybody having seen "Willy Wonker and the Chocolate factory" will know what a spoilt little st she is.
I digress.
I grabbed myself a cider and thought 'ignore them'. No such luck. My wife dragged me over to say hello and I spent the next hour hearing how FCK and Veruca were "top of their class, wonderful children, nobel peace prize nominees, nuclear physicists, and all round amazing fking human beings".
My inner voice was screaming "like fk they are" but somehow my hypocritical mouth uttered "aaaah, how nice for you" whilst trying to force a bucketload of bile back down my retching gullet.
The best was still to come.
Veruca ran round trying to be the centre of attention all afternoon which was bearable but her bloated brother was the star of the show.
Our wonderful hosts spent most of the afternoon BBQing and making sure everyone was well watered. On announcing that the food was ready FCK ran to the front of the queue and proceeded to shove several other kids & adults out the way. Nice. He then filled his plate with a portion of food that would make V8Mate look like an advert for Anorexia UK.
The disgusting little porkbelly then pushed the mountain of food into his well exercised jaws until most of it was gone before pushing his way to the front again. .
This then continued with desserts and ice creams where he put his hand up for 'seconds'. .
On finishing his food he then demanded that the rest of the kids turn the film off the TV because he wanted to see some other programme that he was missing. The host refused as she thought it best to keep the majority of the kids happy and upon this the spoilt brats parents asked if he could "watch it upstairs" as he "needed to see it". Upon informing the cocksockets that they did not have Sky multi-room he burst into tears and threw himself on the floor.
It was at this point I'd had about 6 drinks and I couldn't hold my anger any longer, so told him to 'man up'. At this, he looked through red, teary eyes, began to sob more and demanded that his mother give him the car keys so he could sit in the car. He then stayed there for the next hour (10/10 for persistance) until upon my departure I gave him a cheery wave and mouthed the words "fking bellend" at him. looking on the plus side, at least sitting in a roasting hot car for an hour may have helped him lose a little weight.
I came to the conclusion that my children are angels and I shall never moan about them again.
Others peoples kids & FCK: s.
southendpier said:
WorAl said:
fk me, those parents really need a good bloody slap, not necessarily the kids fault, the parents are clearly letting them get away with it.
I don't have kids but want them at some point, however, other peoples kids, I fully agree, s.
The kids dad is probably bigger than CVM so I guess he is scared. I don't have kids but want them at some point, however, other peoples kids, I fully agree, s.
Better to abuse the kid and whinge about it on here. Migh make him feel better, hoping to get virtual high-fives from other intollerent, kid-hating, internet f*ckwits y'see?
V8mate said:
WorAl said:
but it's not the kids fault in essence, the parents need to get a grip. Though giving a child a slap (not a beating) is far from out of order at times.
Indeed. But having skinhead squaddies mouthing obscenties at little (in age!) kids is not going to help anyone.Who rattled your shopping trolley?
davemac250 said:
Cara van Man said:
V8mate said:
WorAl said:
but it's not the kids fault in essence, the parents need to get a grip. Though giving a child a slap (not a beating) is far from out of order at times.
Indeed. But having skinhead squaddies mouthing obscenties at little (in age!) kids is not going to help anyone.Who rattled your shopping trolley?
oh yeah!
I've obviously touched a nerve by comparing him to FCK.
Edited by Cara van Man on Wednesday 4th August 15:56
southendpier said:
monthefish said:
southendpier said:
Do not equate disciplining children to beating them.
Do not equate a 'smack on the backside' to beating.I was on receiving end of a smack on the backside (always from my mother as it happens) as a child. I would never class myself as having been beaten as a child.
A smack to the legs or being kicked down the stairs.
There is a world of difference.
snowy slopes said:
I would define a beating as the child needing hospital treatment. Would i hit my own kids if i had any? No, but only because if i had any kids they would be a damn sight more well behaved than the average child in britain today, but if they were to step out of line, then a sharp smacking would be given to make sure they wouldnt do it again
havent you just contridicted yourself?southendpier said:
LukeBird said:
Original Poster said:
You actually called a child a "fking bellend"?
That is superb!!
+1 Superb!That is superb!!
:rof
l+:
if someone swore at your child what would you think?
Edited by southendpier on Thursday 5th August 00:34
If you read my post properly, you'll notice I 'mouthed the words' at him rather than bellow it in his face from inches away. I doubt he was intelligent enough to be able to lip read.
I merely made my post for amusement and to relate my amusing encounter with the little fat, wobbly legged spaz. You seem intent on turning the thread into a "anyone who says boo to a child is a serial abuser" thread.
That is all.
sleep envy said:
Cara van Man said:
The disgusting little porkbelly then pushed the mountain of food into his well exercised jaws until most of it was gone before pushing his way to the front again. .
I've seen you eat - you're just jealous he's got sharper, pointier elbows than you*****UPDATE****
I've just had Mrs CVM on the phone telling me how the mother of FCK has said to her "Weren't there some horrible children at the BBQ?"
Holy mother of titty-fking-christ. Unbelievable.
Maybe she needs to take a look at her own spawn of Satan before commenting on other peoples kids.
When we go out, we place a premium on making sure our kids manners are spot on.
I've just had Mrs CVM on the phone telling me how the mother of FCK has said to her "Weren't there some horrible children at the BBQ?"
Holy mother of titty-fking-christ. Unbelievable.
Maybe she needs to take a look at her own spawn of Satan before commenting on other peoples kids.
When we go out, we place a premium on making sure our kids manners are spot on.
WorAl said:
CVM does your better half also notice this childs behaviour BTW?
Yes, she did. We discussed it in the car on the way home also. She was too polite to say anything as the mother is a 'friend' of hers. I, however was a bit pissed and couldn't
Stop myself reacting to the human lardball.
sleep envy said:
Cara van Man said:
sleep envy said:
Cara van Man said:
The disgusting little porkbelly then pushed the mountain of food into his well exercised jaws until most of it was gone before pushing his way to the front again. .
I've seen you eat - you're just jealous he's got sharper, pointier elbows than youCheeky .
They were Sporks.
I tend not to hit my littlun. It's an absolute last resort. The threat of a smack usually works.
However, in the case of FCK I think a bloody good thrashing would sort him out. He's a rude, greedy, fat pig. Imagine Jade Goody in surf shorts. That's him.
I'd quite happily kick his fat arse around my garden as an afternoons entertainment.
God, I hate him.
However, in the case of FCK I think a bloody good thrashing would sort him out. He's a rude, greedy, fat pig. Imagine Jade Goody in surf shorts. That's him.
I'd quite happily kick his fat arse around my garden as an afternoons entertainment.
God, I hate him.
Mazda Baiter said:
Cara van Man said:
I tend not to hit my littlun. It's an absolute last resort. The threat of a smack usually works.
However, in the case of FCK I think a bloody good thrashing would sort him out. He's a rude, greedy, fat pig. Imagine Jade Goody in surf shorts. That's him.
I'd quite happily kick his fat arse around my garden as an afternoons entertainment.
God, I hate him.
Alive or dead?However, in the case of FCK I think a bloody good thrashing would sort him out. He's a rude, greedy, fat pig. Imagine Jade Goody in surf shorts. That's him.
I'd quite happily kick his fat arse around my garden as an afternoons entertainment.
God, I hate him.
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