Effing cancer is an effing effer, frankly
Discussion
Zod said:
My Dad died yesterday. My Mother had called on Wednesday to say he was declining fast in the hospice where he'd spent the previous ten days.on Wednesday night, when my brothers and I arrived, he was still lucid and able to look at photos and videos of his seven grandchildren.
By Thursday morning, passages of lucidity were both increasingly brief and rare. By Friday morning, he wasn't conscious at all. We sat with him, talked to him to try to make him know we were there and then went out for lunch at 1.15. at 1.35, the call came, so we had to leave out lunches and come back. It was obvious this was no interim stage, as there was nowhere for him to go but death. He looked very different, even from the emancipated old man who'd been breathing raspilyhalf an hour earlier. We all said our farewells in our own ways and then took my mother home.
It had been expected for quite some time, but it's going to take me a long time to adjust to no longer having my father.
Damn that disease.
Really sorry to hear that Zod. My Dad died in 1994 and there isn't a day goes by I don't think of him. It will get easier - in time, but it'll never be the same I'm afraid.By Thursday morning, passages of lucidity were both increasingly brief and rare. By Friday morning, he wasn't conscious at all. We sat with him, talked to him to try to make him know we were there and then went out for lunch at 1.15. at 1.35, the call came, so we had to leave out lunches and come back. It was obvious this was no interim stage, as there was nowhere for him to go but death. He looked very different, even from the emancipated old man who'd been breathing raspilyhalf an hour earlier. We all said our farewells in our own ways and then took my mother home.
It had been expected for quite some time, but it's going to take me a long time to adjust to no longer having my father.
Damn that disease.
So for you, Zod, and everyone else affected, once again:
"PHUCK YOU CANCER, YOU f
kING tt".Zod, I shall raise a glass for you, your Dad and your family tonight. Cheers.
swerni said:
Uncle soovy will be along tp suggest opening a bottle of something nice and remember all the good times.
A friend of mine also lost her father this week.
While I can't share the amazing picture she took to commemorate his passing, I will share the caption.
"To live in the heart of others is to never really die"
After my Dad had died, a friend of mine (who's not at all religious) said the most useful thing anyone said to me in those days and weeks that followed, which was much in the same vein.A friend of mine also lost her father this week.
While I can't share the amazing picture she took to commemorate his passing, I will share the caption.
"To live in the heart of others is to never really die"
"Your Dad's still alive, he's just not using his body any more."
Zod, again, my sympathies are with you. Your Dad will live on, in your hearts and memories.
swerni said:
Uncle soovy will be along tp suggest opening a bottle of something nice and remember all the good times.
A friend of mine also lost her father this week.
While I can't share the amazing picture she took to commemorate his passing, I will share the caption.
"To live in the heart of others is to never really die"
I opened a bottle of Vega Sicilia 1982 from his (small) collection last night and toasted him to the bottom of the bottle.A friend of mine also lost her father this week.
While I can't share the amazing picture she took to commemorate his passing, I will share the caption.
"To live in the heart of others is to never really die"
Zod said:
I opened a bottle of Vega Sicilia 1982 from his (small) collection last night and toasted him to the bottom of the bottle.
Nice.
Cancer took my best mate at 34 and left a wife and toddler,so I would like to wade in with a big f
k you.Jessie Ventura sees cancer hiding on the mountain.
Obviously there's no denying that cancer is an effing effer and it can right off while ing itself in the ear.
But I've just come home after a day's volunteering at the Marsden March in south London (big sponsored walk to raise money for the Royal Marsden). Most of those who walked were either suffering from cancer, had recovered from cancer, had lost someone to cancer or were staff at the hospital. Despite the atrocious weather that lasted all day, the mood was terrific and frankly life affirming which for a professional miserablist like me was rather wonderful. My wife and I volunteered last year too and did the walk itself the year before.
So, one way to help lift yourself when down and help the quacks cancer right up, might be to do a spot of volunteering.
None of this is to suggest that cancer isn't a that should be ed into the middle of next week. Because it is.
right off while ing itself in the ear.But I've just come home after a day's volunteering at the Marsden March in south London (big sponsored walk to raise money for the Royal Marsden). Most of those who walked were either suffering from cancer, had recovered from cancer, had lost someone to cancer or were staff at the hospital. Despite the atrocious weather that lasted all day, the mood was terrific and frankly life affirming which for a professional miserablist like me was rather wonderful. My wife and I volunteered last year too and did the walk itself the year before.
So, one way to help lift yourself when down and help the quacks
cancer right up, might be to do a spot of volunteering.None of this is to suggest that cancer isn't a
that should be ed into the middle of next week. Because it is.I've spent this afternoon watch Princess CH junior and about thirty other kids playing violins in a fund raiser where the lead violinist of the CBSO was raising funds. This guy ran twenty miles yesterday and then played lead violin in a Wagner opera!
Fk you cancer! The good guys will finish you in the end, you fer!
F
k you cancer! The good guys will finish you in the end, you fer!
to bring a more positive perspective, survivor here, thank you Addenbrooks, you rock. It took 9 months, but fk me, they know what they were doing.And Cancer, go f
k yourself, took my grandad and my dad, but not me you tt 
.It's a mental thing, not a physical thing, ask anyone who came out the other side.
had ham said:
It's a mental thing, not a physical thing, ask anyone who came out the other side.
It's a luck thing. The right treatment early enough and some indiscriminate luck and you survive. That's it in my view.I've seen some really positive people, mentally tough people die, and some doom and gloom fragile folk survive. And visa versa.
There seems to be no rhyme or reason to it. I'm delighted for all those who make it, but it's luck. To the families of those who don't it isn't because they weren't positive enough, or brave enough, or didn't fight it hard enough, they were just unlucky.
TwigtheWonderkid said:
It's a luck thing. The right treatment early enough and some indiscriminate luck and you survive. That's it in my view.
You can certainly do something about the odds, but I have to agree luck plays a large part in it...assuming of course you do get 'treatment' instead of some holistic nonsense with green tea and candles.I watched my father die from lung cancer - he never smoked. My mother died of bowel cancer - and a 'healthier eater' you'd be hard pressed to find.
My wife had lymphoma in 1985 and is still here, although getting breast cancer in 2010 was a bit of a bugger...but she seems to be through that too thankfully. But one of her friends who had lymphoma too died last year, and another just this week.
Yup, an effing awful disease...and there's a lot of it about
When he was 64 my dad had bowel cancer that caused a blockage, a rupture and peretonitis.
He went from 15 stone to 7.5 stone. He had a resection but the prognosis was very poor. The doctors gave up on him, put him in a private room and told us to expect the worst. My exwife being in the medical field did some research and we discovered that he wasn't getting the extremely expensive antibiotic drug treatment he needed.
I had a private meeting with the consultant. I may or may not have locked the door. I offered to pay for whatever drugs were needed. I may or may not have held said consultant up by his lapels against the window. I may or may not have also told the consultant that if my dad didn't get his drugs the American self insuring oil company I worked for with a myriad of lawyers at its disposal would be suing his ass off........
That night my dad was given his first intrevenous drug /antibiotic. We weren't asked for a contribution
Three days later he chasing the food trolley down the corridor asking where his "bloody breakfast" was.
He is now in a fantastic care home at 89, with dementia, but having had another 20 plus years of life after cancer. No chemo, no radio therapy. At 70 he was climbing roofs repointing chimneys.
Stick that up your chuff you cancer tt you didn't get my dad............
Cheers,
Tony
He went from 15 stone to 7.5 stone. He had a resection but the prognosis was very poor. The doctors gave up on him, put him in a private room and told us to expect the worst. My exwife being in the medical field did some research and we discovered that he wasn't getting the extremely expensive antibiotic drug treatment he needed.
I had a private meeting with the consultant. I may or may not have locked the door. I offered to pay for whatever drugs were needed. I may or may not have held said consultant up by his lapels against the window. I may or may not have also told the consultant that if my dad didn't get his drugs the American self insuring oil company I worked for with a myriad of lawyers at its disposal would be suing his ass off........
That night my dad was given his first intrevenous drug /antibiotic. We weren't asked for a contribution
Three days later he chasing the food trolley down the corridor asking where his "bloody breakfast" was.
He is now in a fantastic care home at 89, with dementia, but having had another 20 plus years of life after cancer. No chemo, no radio therapy. At 70 he was climbing roofs repointing chimneys.
Stick that up your chuff you cancer t
t you didn't get my dad............Cheers,
Tony
my thoughts are with you Zod and the OP
It is coming up to one year since i lost my beautiful mother to cancer, she fought for 10 years but succumbed to it on the morning of 7th of April 2012, having spent the last 37 days of her life (including her last birthday)at St Anne's Hospice. Words could not describe the loss i felt and continue to feel to this day, i think about and miss her everyday, my heart goes out to everyone who has lost loved ones at the hands of this fking of a disease.
love you mum, rest in peace sweetheart x
It is coming up to one year since i lost my beautiful mother to cancer, she fought for 10 years but succumbed to it on the morning of 7th of April 2012, having spent the last 37 days of her life (including her last birthday)at St Anne's Hospice. Words could not describe the loss i felt and continue to feel to this day, i think about and miss her everyday, my heart goes out to everyone who has lost loved ones at the hands of this f
king of a disease.love you mum, rest in peace sweetheart x
Edited by Jam Rock on Monday 18th March 11:38
Talking of hospices, I should say that the Manorlands Hospice at Oxenhope is a truly wonderful place, with dedicated, caring staff. I am truly thankful that my Dad's last twelve days were spent there, rather than in hospital.
It seems bizarre that I was speaking to him on the phone at this time two weeks ago on the way up to see him on his first day there. I just found his Happy New Year voicemail on my phone this weekend. It's the only one I have from him.
It seems bizarre that I was speaking to him on the phone at this time two weeks ago on the way up to see him on his first day there. I just found his Happy New Year voicemail on my phone this weekend. It's the only one I have from him.
Zod said:
swerni said:
Uncle soovy will be along tp suggest opening a bottle of something nice and remember all the good times.
A friend of mine also lost her father this week.
While I can't share the amazing picture she took to commemorate his passing, I will share the caption.
"To live in the heart of others is to never really die"
I opened a bottle of Vega Sicilia 1982 from his (small) collection last night and toasted him to the bottom of the bottle.A friend of mine also lost her father this week.
While I can't share the amazing picture she took to commemorate his passing, I will share the caption.
"To live in the heart of others is to never really die"
Well done on drinking to him. It's what he would have wanted.
In time you will (as I did) feel nothing but peace from his release. Your post brought back a lot - in particular how my father looked just before he died. Remember him how he was before, not like that - he had already gone.
Take care, friend.
Edited by RSoovy4 on Monday 18th March 11:55
To Zod and all those who have lost loved ones my sincere condolences. fk you cancer!
But, I am so keen to highlight that cancer is not the automatic death sentence it once was; and rather than be scared of it we should face it head on. There are people out there performing miracles in keeping cancer at bay and even 'curing' it. IMHO we should support in whatever big or small way we can.
7 weeks ago I was told I had colon cancer, a 5 cm tumour in the colon wall and blocking 80% of my colon. I know I have had the symptoms for nigh on two years, I have the medical records showing my visit to the doctor then, complaining of blood in my stools. I was lucky enough to have had it discovered by a scan that I chose to have; this also told me that despite the size/time period I had no secondaries showing.
3 weeks ago they took the bd out in a 6.5 hour operation. Last week the results showed no spread to the lymph nodes whatsoever. In the experts' opinion, no chemo required. This superb news does not mean it may not return, but it does mean the chances are much less! In the words of my nephew who is a doctor working in research "Congratulations, you lucky lucky man!"
Luck? Judgement? Positive mental attitude? Divine intervention? Who knows.
In my case, who cares. What I do know is that through the Incredible support, prayers and determination of my wonderful family and friends (including virtual
) the incredible medical team who in my eyes performed a miracle (the details of the keyhole surgery are truly amazing) the incredible research carried out by so many unknown geniuses and intervention of Him/Her above I am truly blessed.
Cancer is a horrible disease that brings suffering and misery, but it's NOT winning all the time! Success stories are plentiful; there is still opportunity to defeat and overcome. Be vigilant know the symptoms and don't be scared to confront it.
If you come back again you fking bd, I'll be ready for you. N GUNS!!
k you cancer!But, I am so keen to highlight that cancer is not the automatic death sentence it once was; and rather than be scared of it we should face it head on. There are people out there performing miracles in keeping cancer at bay and even 'curing' it. IMHO we should support in whatever big or small way we can.
7 weeks ago I was told I had colon cancer, a 5 cm tumour in the colon wall and blocking 80% of my colon. I know I have had the symptoms for nigh on two years, I have the medical records showing my visit to the doctor then, complaining of blood in my stools. I was lucky enough to have had it discovered by a scan that I chose to have; this also told me that despite the size/time period I had no secondaries showing.
3 weeks ago they took the b
d out in a 6.5 hour operation. Last week the results showed no spread to the lymph nodes whatsoever. In the experts' opinion, no chemo required. This superb news does not mean it may not return, but it does mean the chances are much less! In the words of my nephew who is a doctor working in research "Congratulations, you lucky lucky man!"Luck? Judgement? Positive mental attitude? Divine intervention? Who knows.
In my case, who cares. What I do know is that through the Incredible support, prayers and determination of my wonderful family and friends (including virtual
) the incredible medical team who in my eyes performed a miracle (the details of the keyhole surgery are truly amazing) the incredible research carried out by so many unknown geniuses and intervention of Him/Her above I am truly blessed.Cancer is a horrible disease that brings suffering and misery, but it's NOT winning all the time! Success stories are plentiful; there is still opportunity to defeat and overcome. Be vigilant know the symptoms and don't be scared to confront it.
If you come back again you f
king bd, I'll be ready for you. N GUNS!!
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