Discussion
shirt said:
i finally have a diagnosis. did a proper one with a specialist over 4 hrs plus interviews with friends and family. i had thought that if anything i'd be inattentive only but she has me as combined type. its the impulsive/inappropriate side of the diagnosis that i have tbh, makes me feel a not insignificant amount of shame and guilt.
I hope that the diagnosis and any resulting treatment helps you.What sort of symptoms do you display day to day?
I’ve had it for years and managed to get by without meds through using psychologist (and occasionally Modafinil) . I thrive under pressure best and need constant watching/micro management, so my first grad job which I did was exactly that. Did all my coursework and dissertation night before and still got 1st. However, covid working from home and new job in public sector meant I could literally get away with doing no work or bare minimum. Switched jobs to private side last year and target driven but struggling to do anything (again wfh). Now 30 and also had big aspirations to work for myself and want to do this, but know i’m not yet ready for this yet.
Outside of work i’ve always been risk taker and engaging in devient behaviours which got worse last year and spending money like it grows on trees (spent £15k in last 3 months with no idea on what!). Tend to run away when things get too much which isn’t great and avoid responsibly (never had gf, mortgage, finance or even paid a utility bill with phone contract being the height of my direct debits!!).
Decided to get on meds month ago and started on concerta 18mg which did nothing and now on 36mg so seeing how it goes. Will go back to seeing a shrink also which I ditched last year. Over the years I give myself clean breaks and always go back to square one! Feel like i’m having another clean break now but really want it to work this time and get to where I want to be. Can’t offer any advice really as haven’t figure life out yet for myself, but shrinks are good but need to find the work that works well with you.
Outside of work i’ve always been risk taker and engaging in devient behaviours which got worse last year and spending money like it grows on trees (spent £15k in last 3 months with no idea on what!). Tend to run away when things get too much which isn’t great and avoid responsibly (never had gf, mortgage, finance or even paid a utility bill with phone contract being the height of my direct debits!!).
Decided to get on meds month ago and started on concerta 18mg which did nothing and now on 36mg so seeing how it goes. Will go back to seeing a shrink also which I ditched last year. Over the years I give myself clean breaks and always go back to square one! Feel like i’m having another clean break now but really want it to work this time and get to where I want to be. Can’t offer any advice really as haven’t figure life out yet for myself, but shrinks are good but need to find the work that works well with you.
Edited by Freshprince on Wednesday 6th April 15:43
Edited by Freshprince on Wednesday 6th April 15:43
Evoluzione said:
Job38 said:
I was diagnosed last year, aged 52!
Finally on a cocktail of medications - has TRANSFORMED my life!
Now you can write a lengthy post without wandering off to do something else would you like to tell us the full story?Finally on a cocktail of medications - has TRANSFORMED my life!
Reddit has a good sub-reddit regarding ADHD.
Assessment options are either private paid for (circa £8-900) or convince your GP and then potentially 2-3 year wait. If you go down NHS route, you can choose the Right to Choose route which could mean being seen quicker, but still a wait of 6-12 months.
https://psychiatry-uk.com/right-to-choose/
Assessment options are either private paid for (circa £8-900) or convince your GP and then potentially 2-3 year wait. If you go down NHS route, you can choose the Right to Choose route which could mean being seen quicker, but still a wait of 6-12 months.
https://psychiatry-uk.com/right-to-choose/
Freshprince said:
I’ve had it for years and managed to get by without meds through using psychologist (and occasionally Modafinil) . I thrive under pressure best and need constant watching/micro management, so my first grad job which I did was exactly that. Did all my coursework and dissertation night before and still got 1st. However, covid working from home and new job in public sector meant I could literally get away with doing no work or bare minimum. Switched jobs to private side last year and target driven but struggling to do anything (again wfh). Now 30 and also had big aspirations to work for myself and want to do this, but know i’m not yet ready for this yet.
Outside of work i’ve always been risk taker and engaging in devient behaviours which got worse last year and spending money like it grows on trees (spent £15k in last 3 months with no idea on what!). Tend to run away when things get too much which isn’t great and avoid responsibly (never had gf, mortgage, finance or even paid a utility bill with phone contract being the height of my direct debits!!).
Decided to get on meds month ago and started on concerta 18mg which did nothing and now on 36mg so seeing how it goes. Will go back to seeing a shrink also which I ditched last year. Over the years I give myself clean breaks and always go back to square one! Feel like i’m having another clean break now but really want it to work this time and get to where I want to be. Can’t offer any advice really as haven’t figure life out yet for myself, but shrinks are good but need to find the work that works well with you.
No formal diagnosis, but I can relate to basically all of that a lot. Outside of work i’ve always been risk taker and engaging in devient behaviours which got worse last year and spending money like it grows on trees (spent £15k in last 3 months with no idea on what!). Tend to run away when things get too much which isn’t great and avoid responsibly (never had gf, mortgage, finance or even paid a utility bill with phone contract being the height of my direct debits!!).
Decided to get on meds month ago and started on concerta 18mg which did nothing and now on 36mg so seeing how it goes. Will go back to seeing a shrink also which I ditched last year. Over the years I give myself clean breaks and always go back to square one! Feel like i’m having another clean break now but really want it to work this time and get to where I want to be. Can’t offer any advice really as haven’t figure life out yet for myself, but shrinks are good but need to find the work that works well with you.
As you say, first grad job was easy, enjoyable really, if not likely to keep me busy for ever. But working in a large multinational engineering company in a small project team, given nice ring fenced projects I did quickly and well to defined time scales and desired outcomes.
Like to push the boundaries in work as much as outside of it, this currently place is very H&S driven, make sure you hold the hand rails on the stairs, will near miss people who cycle across the carpark without a crash hat, really trying not to get fired in the first year but also well up for skirting around the limits of what is allowed.
Ebay is dangerous, as is getting keen on something where you can upgrade/spend money, I know it needs to be kept in check and I now have a child and family home, but I am sure i've spent more on lawncare in the last two years than most! Never bought anything seriously expensive or irredeemable but I can see how people would. I did suggest to my partner we could by a 1920s car while she was watching peaky blinders, her saying yes was a surprise but we do now own one.
Half of me is ok with life as it is, but also as I get older (now 35) and find myself in fairly senior ish roles, at time really pulling my hair out to keep all the plates in the air and not spend it on pistonheads or chatting about non-work relaated things, while also doing a house renovation, I do often wonder longingly at what it might be like if my head was a little less all over the place!
Lets us know how it goes.
Super interesting thread so thankyou for contributing all, bittersweet reading some of the contributions , terribly sad and such relief that it isn’t just me…..
I was diagnosed with ADD as a child (25 odd years ago not sure ADHD was even a thing ) but back then there wasn’t any support , and very little follow up, home life was such a disaster that surviving day to day took precedence , as I grew up as an angry young man i left a lot of hurt and devastation in my wake, alienated family and only ever formed friendships with equally troubled peers, Expelled from schools , came away with zero qualifications, and narrowly avoided prison.
I was diagnosed with PTSD from my childhood a few years ago and did a lot of work around letting the anger go.
ADD / ADHD shaped much of my life, conscious of it everyday, having turned 40 , how I’ve navigated to this point without killing myself is a mystery .
I have a handful of close friends but most people are kept distant , the facade of a successful person (materialistically at least) is the shield I hide behind ,and I often look back at my interactions day to day with a sadness that I didn’t say this or say that or didn’t shut up and Listen. People don’t choose to spend time with me which i find sad.
Access to money is something I m now quite careful with , earlier in life I d spend every penny and very much linked money to happiness , countless dramas around money, only been the last 5 years or so where I’ve built something I m too scared to lose that makes me careful now, does feel like I m ‘white knuckling it ‘ quite of the time though.
I struggle to concentrate , can’t sit through a film, having conversations involve me going round the houses with 300 different thoughts at once that means I never quite get to the point . It’s tiring for everyone!
I ve been very fortunate that my partner has stuck by me despite deviant behaviour. She’s put up with a lot and now can point out pattern behaviour , the standing joke is I m a special one, we ve had therapy for some time and I’ve been able to open up about my childhood.
Took me several attempts to write the above , but thank you for everyone who has shared , keep it going !
I was diagnosed with ADD as a child (25 odd years ago not sure ADHD was even a thing ) but back then there wasn’t any support , and very little follow up, home life was such a disaster that surviving day to day took precedence , as I grew up as an angry young man i left a lot of hurt and devastation in my wake, alienated family and only ever formed friendships with equally troubled peers, Expelled from schools , came away with zero qualifications, and narrowly avoided prison.
I was diagnosed with PTSD from my childhood a few years ago and did a lot of work around letting the anger go.
ADD / ADHD shaped much of my life, conscious of it everyday, having turned 40 , how I’ve navigated to this point without killing myself is a mystery .
I have a handful of close friends but most people are kept distant , the facade of a successful person (materialistically at least) is the shield I hide behind ,and I often look back at my interactions day to day with a sadness that I didn’t say this or say that or didn’t shut up and Listen. People don’t choose to spend time with me which i find sad.
Access to money is something I m now quite careful with , earlier in life I d spend every penny and very much linked money to happiness , countless dramas around money, only been the last 5 years or so where I’ve built something I m too scared to lose that makes me careful now, does feel like I m ‘white knuckling it ‘ quite of the time though.
I struggle to concentrate , can’t sit through a film, having conversations involve me going round the houses with 300 different thoughts at once that means I never quite get to the point . It’s tiring for everyone!
I ve been very fortunate that my partner has stuck by me despite deviant behaviour. She’s put up with a lot and now can point out pattern behaviour , the standing joke is I m a special one, we ve had therapy for some time and I’ve been able to open up about my childhood.
Took me several attempts to write the above , but thank you for everyone who has shared , keep it going !
Edited by Fckitdriveon on Tuesday 3rd May 02:24
Ok, so some background and summary:
Struggled at school with dyslexia and dyscalculia, O Level and A Level grades all over the place.
Scraped into university and stumbled on something I could do - Architecture. Excelled but chronic procrastination.
Early career successful but only with things I really enjoyed doing - rubbish at everything else.
Relationships suffered with rejection dysphoria.
Procrastination, lack of focus and avoidance accelerated, especially during lock-down, used alcohol to self medicate (in hindsight).
Following lengthy diagnosis and counselling started lisdexamphetamine in November.
Transformative!
I can focus, able to process multiple thoughts, think strategically, estimate 60% more productive.
Enjoying life, get up at 0500 work at least 12 hours and love it, relationships better (I'm kinder apparently).
Mentoring undergraduates online in the evening. I've also out sourced as much as possible the things I'm not good at/not able to do.
Struggled at school with dyslexia and dyscalculia, O Level and A Level grades all over the place.
Scraped into university and stumbled on something I could do - Architecture. Excelled but chronic procrastination.
Early career successful but only with things I really enjoyed doing - rubbish at everything else.
Relationships suffered with rejection dysphoria.
Procrastination, lack of focus and avoidance accelerated, especially during lock-down, used alcohol to self medicate (in hindsight).
Following lengthy diagnosis and counselling started lisdexamphetamine in November.
Transformative!
I can focus, able to process multiple thoughts, think strategically, estimate 60% more productive.
Enjoying life, get up at 0500 work at least 12 hours and love it, relationships better (I'm kinder apparently).
Mentoring undergraduates online in the evening. I've also out sourced as much as possible the things I'm not good at/not able to do.
Interesting notes on rejection sensitivity and that your wife says you’re kinder on meds.
Is being seen as argumentative common amongst the group?
I hate being my own worst enemy. Can’t get a psych appointment tomorrow so that’s another 8 weeks (going away with work) until I can get meds :/
Is being seen as argumentative common amongst the group?
I hate being my own worst enemy. Can’t get a psych appointment tomorrow so that’s another 8 weeks (going away with work) until I can get meds :/
Job38 said:
Ok, so some background and summary:
Struggled at school with dyslexia and dyscalculia, O Level and A Level grades all over the place.
Scraped into university and stumbled on something I could do - Architecture. Excelled but chronic procrastination.
Early career successful but only with things I really enjoyed doing - rubbish at everything else.
Relationships suffered with rejection dysphoria.
Procrastination, lack of focus and avoidance accelerated, especially during lock-down, used alcohol to self medicate (in hindsight).
Following lengthy diagnosis and counselling started lisdexamphetamine in November.
Transformative!
I can focus, able to process multiple thoughts, think strategically, estimate 60% more productive.
Enjoying life, get up at 0500 work at least 12 hours and love it, relationships better (I'm kinder apparently).
Mentoring undergraduates online in the evening. I've also out sourced as much as possible the things I'm not good at/not able to do.
Thanks for the reply. Struggled at school with dyslexia and dyscalculia, O Level and A Level grades all over the place.
Scraped into university and stumbled on something I could do - Architecture. Excelled but chronic procrastination.
Early career successful but only with things I really enjoyed doing - rubbish at everything else.
Relationships suffered with rejection dysphoria.
Procrastination, lack of focus and avoidance accelerated, especially during lock-down, used alcohol to self medicate (in hindsight).
Following lengthy diagnosis and counselling started lisdexamphetamine in November.
Transformative!
I can focus, able to process multiple thoughts, think strategically, estimate 60% more productive.
Enjoying life, get up at 0500 work at least 12 hours and love it, relationships better (I'm kinder apparently).
Mentoring undergraduates online in the evening. I've also out sourced as much as possible the things I'm not good at/not able to do.
Have you suffered from any side-effects?
Total loss said:
Woodrow Wilson said:
ps. Some people seem to take offence to fairly direct, very rational, opinions too. Weirdos 
Ever watch 'the big bang theory '?I found it interesting that I would agree with lots of what Sheldon said, not all, & could see the others reactions & still I'd think why couldn't they see where he was coming from.
Found a new psychiatrist today which was a miracle in itself as it’s Eid holidays. Top bloke. Funny and insightful, like half doctor half chatting to your mate in the pub.
Prescribed Concerta again as it’s about the only option out here. Told me to start with 18mg and slowly progress to 54.
I took 2 x 36mg tablets. f
k me was I ever productive but when I stopped it was like I was on something. Had to take a couple of dormicum to calm down.
No more self medicating. Thankful for the script tho. Work recently has been terrible and I’ve had major rsd.
Prescribed Concerta again as it’s about the only option out here. Told me to start with 18mg and slowly progress to 54.
I took 2 x 36mg tablets. f
k me was I ever productive but when I stopped it was like I was on something. Had to take a couple of dormicum to calm down. No more self medicating. Thankful for the script tho. Work recently has been terrible and I’ve had major rsd.
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