Mental Health after a car crash

[simoid]

YorkshireWhisky said:

I found that these help after a big crash.

I assume that was in the 1950s, where that attitude belongs.

[r159]

I’ve had two proper crashes, both involved ending up being upside down and 60 mph to 0 in short order. Second one in in particular could have resulted in very serious injury if it wasn’t for luck. As it was I had a couple of scratches but it fking hurt. Thankfully no one else was involved.

In my case it was not reading the conditions/having the ability to deal with it.

I can see the events in my mind as I type this well over 20 years later and I will never forget them.

As I know why they happened - it was all down to my own actions, they have gone in the hindsight bit of my brain (getting quite full) for use in the future. I also did some skid pan training, not sure if would have saved me but it has helped my driving since.

I have had counselling in the past for other mental health issues through events which were out of my control and it helped me to deal with things like this so they don’t take control of my life.

[sutoka]

I had someone smash into the back of me while I was stationary in traffic about two and a half years ago, he came over the lights while doing 40-50mph while fiddling with his stereo, slammed into the rear quarter, I heard a massive bang and then after a few seconds felt the worst pain I've ever felt in my life . I'm still waiting to have spinal surgery, full time job gone, most of my mobility gone strength in arms gone, constant pain goes from bearable to crippling, leg cramps, sciatica you name it I've got it. I couldn't drive for about three months after so by the time I could I was raring to get back although I had to develop a unique way of getting in and out. This involves sitting o the seat and then swinging both legs in.

One thing I've found in the last two years is that if I'm stationary and see a car approaching to overtake me in the mirror I almost brace for impact. Passengers have noticed it but it's just something I do now.

One thing that affects me most is seeing people out and about in the Spring and Summer, going for long walks, playing sport etc it really gets me down. I used to play football several times a week and that's not possible. Even going out and socialising is something that isn't easily done anymore. I can't have more than a drink or I'd risk injuring myself further.

I wouldn't say I've got depression as I've had the inside looking out vibe of depressing in the past but it's definitely affected my mental health since the person that caused it still denies he caused it and I feel I've been let down medically and legally. I am in some sort of purgatory and my life is on hold until such times as I get to position one in the waiting list.

Edited by sutoka on Sunday 23 May 05:39

[Pit Pony]

hidetheelephants said:

oddman said:

This sounds like it would fall within the broad diagnostic realm of PTSD. You've essentially become hypervigilant which is a rational response to your experience.
<snip>
Wishing you well

What he said.

I'm sure that we never used to call.it a mental.health issue. Is it really PTSD ? Do we really need professional counselling?
Or do we need to get back on the horse and be wary .

I was involved as a passenger in a crash that resulted in the death of a pedestrian, back in the 90s.
It was 2 days before i could cross a road on my own.
My fiancee ( now wife of 31 years) solved it, by telling me to pull myself together, pull up.my big girl pants and be happy I wasn't injured.
Mind you she was working in A&E at the time as a student nurse, so fk knows what trauma she was seeing on a daily basis.

But yes being hyper vigilant is a natural response to this.

Once seized the engine of an RD350LC at about 70 mph.
Once I'd rebuilt the engine, I never really enjoyed riding it, scared it would happen again. Then I fell off in the ice, and once repair I sold it. Not been on a motorbike since. Convinced that it would kill me.

[Riley Blue]

Pit Pony said:

hidetheelephants said:

oddman said:

This sounds like it would fall within the broad diagnostic realm of PTSD. You've essentially become hypervigilant which is a rational response to your experience.
<snip>
Wishing you well

What he said.

I'm sure that we never used to call.it a mental.health issue. Is it really PTSD ? Do we really need professional counselling?

A friend of mine had a near fatal accident in February. He has very slowly recovered, both physically and mentally, and I've had regular messages from him about his progress. He's been experiencing PTSD and has been receiving counselling so yes, based on his account it's real.

Once his replacement car was delivered he was advised first to sit in it for ten minutes, then a bit longer, then start the engine, then move it on his drive, then drive round the village; all as a return to confident driving in preparation for his 30 mile daily motorway commute.

[simoid]

The only thing I would question about PTSD is the D part. It doesn’t strike me as a disorder to have stress after a trauma.

[Mr Whippy]

simoid said:

The only thing I would question about PTSD is the D part. It doesn’t strike me as a disorder to have stress after a trauma.

The problem is your brain has no choice.

The memory and experience are training... our entire lives are training to survive, and a big trauma becomes a big part of our subconscious training to survive.

So you now have an activity that can perpetually trigger our fight or flight response.

If we suppress it and ‘grow a pair of balls’ we then assume we keep doing that same activity again and again until our brain assumes it’s safe again... but we’ve been doing it all our lives any way.
We know it’s safe but our brain doesn’t.

Suppressing emotions isn’t great. I assume PTSD is a result of ignoring our flight/fight response rather than dealing with it in a constructive way.
You might not even see it as suppressing. Many people think ignoring traumas or distracting yourself till all feels ok again, is dealing with it.

Friends and family and people on forums are great to talk to, but a professional is much more likely to get you to deal with things constructively and not unwittingly encourage unhealthy ways to deal with it.



Again I’d just wait 3-6 months and however you feel go see a counsellor and see what they say after you explain what happened.

If they’re any good they’ll tell you if you’ve dealt with it in a healthy way or not.



As noted, it may not seem much when it’s one thing, and you’re young.
When you get older and add trauma onto trauma and suppress it all, then you end up not great.

[Z064life]

I've managed to make some contacts with others who were in the same boat as me (significant accidents, kept the same car) and driving again. Those people too suffer some psychological challenges, e.g. trust etc. This channel of communication is helpful, and I am looking to make it a good tool to help.

I am no PTSD expert, but I don't think a car crash is a "man up" type event. It is/was sudden, unexpected, unpredictable, left plenty to fear, etc.


I went for another drive, car was 100% (tracking straight, tyre pressures good, etc), so all good there, just can't shake the association of noises on the road, and road surfaces, with the crash (as well natural steering wheel movements). I need to work on this, this is my biggest challenge from happy motoring. Unfortunately, if it was another example of the same model, setup in the same way, it would behave in the same way which would invoke the same feelings.

I also had another drive that involved a short motorway run (at 50mph due to average speed limits etc), which was also good and has helped. The noises on the road and bumps etc I am less and less shaken by (mentally), partly as I am used to the car more now.

(Just to add, this reply has been written over a few days, two paragraphs above was about 5 days ago, most recent drive 2 days ago).

I certainly see a change in my behaviour and emotions while driving, I am less clammy, less tense, more relaxed. While I always listen to music, I put it a bit louder (but not too loud to not be able to hear emergency vehicles) and some commentary driving (in my head) helps, so definitely improving. I am not quite there yet but improving with just solo practice. I've made some enquiries on local driving courses (looking on the advanced driving section), which will help me with the last 10%. Counselling etc will help with irrational fears and paranoia. Fingers crossed I can keep progressing.

[Jonmx]

Z064life said:

Fingers crossed I can keep progressing.

How are you getting on?

[Z064life]

Jonmx said:

How are you getting on?

The biggest challenge now is confidence on motorways, i.e. doing 70-80 mph and not 60, as per my last outing. It may be just 10mph, but there is some sort of mental block to that extra 10mph. Funny thing is I did 70mph on the same stretch of A/M road in the first weekend I had the car back.

I guess the difference between then and now is I let my mind wander and negative thoughts come into my head. I have a course booked in two weeks which is around motorway driving and generally building confidence post crash, which I am hoping will put me back to where I was pre crash. I think having an instructor I can talk to as I drive will help me relax and build confidence.

However, on the whole, I have noticed my mental state improve to where I was pre crash, so I am happy, I guess these things happen at their own pace.

[r159]

Z064life said:

The biggest challenge now is confidence on motorways, i.e. doing 70-80 mph and not 60, as per my last outing. It may be just 10mph, but there is some sort of mental block to that extra 10mph. Funny thing is I did 70mph on the same stretch of A/M road in the first weekend I had the car back.

I guess the difference between then and now is I let my mind wander and negative thoughts come into my head. I have a course booked in two weeks which is around motorway driving and generally building confidence post crash, which I am hoping will put me back to where I was pre crash. I think having an instructor I can talk to as I drive will help me relax and build confidence.

However, on the whole, I have noticed my mental state improve to where I was pre crash, so I am happy, I guess these things happen at their own pace.

Good news.

I used to commute from Reading to Heathrow on the M4 where there seemed to be an accident every day, but after 16 years of a commute of 20 minutes drive through the country roads going back on a motorway in peak traffic takes some adjusting…

[Jonmx]

Z064life said:

Jonmx said:

How are you getting on?

The biggest challenge now is confidence on motorways, i.e. doing 70-80 mph and not 60, as per my last outing. It may be just 10mph, but there is some sort of mental block to that extra 10mph. Funny thing is I did 70mph on the same stretch of A/M road in the first weekend I had the car back.

I guess the difference between then and now is I let my mind wander and negative thoughts come into my head. I have a course booked in two weeks which is around motorway driving and generally building confidence post crash, which I am hoping will put me back to where I was pre crash. I think having an instructor I can talk to as I drive will help me relax and build confidence.

However, on the whole, I have noticed my mental state improve to where I was pre crash, so I am happy, I guess these things happen at their own pace.

That 10mph is no bad thing and there are silver linings around mpg, safety etc. Excuse the pun, but there's no rush to be hitting speeds in excess of 70mph. Guessing the course is this weekend?
Your attitude is spot on to my mind. Caution, reflection and common sense are to be commended. I'm currently battling my 75 year old father who recently broke his ankle in 3 places, has a muscle wasting condition in his other leg and is desperate to keep driving and to get a new car. He has no common sense and hasn't evaluated his circumstances and reflected on suitability to drive. Driving is a big responsibility and some folks just don't seem to understand that.

Hope the course goes well.

[Hugo Stiglitz]

Was anyone else injured, who was at fault?

I had a significant one in my teens (not the driver) but I had a bizarre cycle fall/injury not my fault 6 months ago.

It's wiped my confidence on the bike. I'm jumpy as hell.

So it's no surprise OP.

The other thing to consider is if others were injured or other party (or you) caused the crash.

That adds another dimension.

It's like ripples, it takes time. You'll get there.

[Teddy Lop]

Have no idea how good of a driver you are so no disrespect if of a high capability already and of course not knowing the particulars doesn't help - but might some tuition in controlling on a car on the edge eg skid pan, rally course instill more confidence?

[Z064life]

Teddy Lop said:

Have no idea how good of a driver you are so no disrespect if of a high capability already and of course not knowing the particulars doesn't help - but might some tuition in controlling on a car on the edge eg skid pan, rally course instill more confidence?

Hi, yes, yes it would. This is on my list of things to do. Or even a wet skidpan.

Note the accident was in the rain and i have not had a motorway drive in the rain yet. I had my first motorway drive which was uneventful but I am paranoid and on edge about things like the car tramlining, potholes, etc. Car only tramlines due to its wide, low profile tires, its had alignment and got the correct tire pressures, so just the nature of owning a performance car.

As a driver, got plenty I can learn so keeping an open mind.

Now that I have done some solo, high speed drives (well by high speed, NSL), I am hoping my confidence can go up a few notches.

[Evoluzione]

The healing process is 80% time, 20% experience.
Get on with that and you'll be ok.

[Z064life]

Evoluzione said:

The healing process is 80% time, 20% experience.
Get on with that and you'll be ok.

Yup. Everyone processes this differently and being my first crash, I am probably learning how I process it and the emotions involved. I'm still making milestones, which is good. Can't really ask for more than that. Just don't let fear take over and then not do anything at all. I'm exploring all avenues of help and keeping an open mind.

[Mexican cuties]

this all rings so true ref brain side, had a nasty fall last year, broke my back which wasnt picked up on due to covid, when finally got some treatment and therapy, after being told just get some physio, trained specialist said its your brain and your back you need to sort at same time, you cant do one without the other , it was explained that your brain will be guarding you, so the more you can reassure your brain, the less it will panic. deffo baby steps ref trying to get into my car, limited mobility issues, means not touched, can just about get myself in as a passenger to a bigger car, again for ages saw danger everywhere, so still using techniques to de sensitize, and not go straight to flight, or freeze. taken some serious trying and not always without tears and anxiousness. hope it all works out in the end, baby steps i am told on a regular basis, from some one who helps people regain mobility. was terrifying to find myself almost running back to my husbands car when the crowds at a Santa pod event overwhelmed me, panic attack ensued, as not been around that many people for months.

again techniques given just to stop take yourself away from the situation and breathe!!

[hotchy]

Get back to it soon as if the best way. I was involved in a crash 2 years ago and still get edgy when looking at a car waiting at a junction after one pulled out while I was at 60. However it gets better as time passes

[anonymous-user]

I came off my bike the other day and ended up with loads of minor injuries. It gave me a bit of a shock though to find myself lying in the road and my bike all mangled a few meters away.

Luckily no cars were coming as it was on a corner.

When I got back in the car as a passenger I felt a bit jittery and like my wife was driving too fast, everything kind of felt a bit vivid too and I felt a bit uneasy like something bad might happen, it passed after a few journeys though and then when I was driving myself it happened a little bit too but soon died down.

It sometimes helps just to try and notice how you feel and then realise it’s normal but it’s just thoughts. Creating this distance between your thoughts like this can help break the cycle and stop it becoming a bit of a cycle of anxiety or worry.

So in this case I’d actually ‘say’ to myself (in my head) ‘oh look I feel a bit worried’ then I’d say to myself ‘that’s ok it’s because I had that accident and it’s normal, it’s just a thought and it isn’t real’ then I wouldn’t feel so bad.

This works for all kinds of things where you might be prone to negative thoughts or behaviours. Things like mindfulness also help with this kind of thing, reinforcing that your thoughts are just like passing clouds that you notice but you don’t need to think about too much and be taken over by. The natural state of your mind is like a sunny day and these thoughts or worries, anger, stress, anxiety etc (or whatever it is) aren’t you, they’re just something temporarily passing by.

Hope you feel better soon.