Cannabis, alcohol, depression and anxiety
Discussion
Morning all,
I'm not exactly a regular poster in here, but wanted to hear some advice/opinions/experiences from fellow PHers. I also thought it might be therapeutic in some way or another to talk about it. I do need to stress though, I am not after sympathy.
I guess I should probably tell you a bit about myself, and as I'm sure you've gathered from the title of this thread, it's not going to be about hitting the gym.
I'm 24, I've been smoking cannabis since I was 14, more or less constantly, I've also been drinking quite heavily (on and off) for a few years now. I'm a bit of a loner, have very few friends, and those I do have are either through drugs, or through work. I seem to struggle socially, find it quite difficult to make friends and talk to people freely, hate going out to pubs or clubs, would much rather stay in and watch motorsport or drive the ‘ring on my Playstation.
There was a point a few years ago, I think I was about 19, when I was headed down a very dark path, far harder drugs, the wrong sorts of people, and being arrested a few times. I managed to stop that (I like to think that in part this was due to PH, and my complete addiction to cars, and the engineering involved), but couldn’t stop cannabis, and that was when I started drinking a fair bit too.
So 4 years of constant smoking and regular drinking followed, and I guess I convinced myself that that lifestyle was ok, and I could manage that indefinitely.
In short that brings us up to now. I split up with the girl I was going to marry about a year ago (not solely due to my drug/alcohol usage, but we were both a mess), and that screwed me up hugely, still have huge feelings for her, and I have no idea if they’re reciprocated. Right now, I don’t think I can deal with finding out.
And that brings me nicely onto why I’m posting this. I stopped smoking cannabis last Friday, for good, I’m 6 days in, haven’t even felt an urge. But every day since I’m having these feelings I can only really describe as anxiety attacks mixed with intense depression. I’ve always suffered from mild depression, had extreme mood swings and that sort of thing, but never had these consistent feelings of… uneasiness and fear I suppose. I’m quite worried that they aren’t going to stop. I also can’t sleep, the most I’ve gotten is 2 hours in the past 6 days.
I think alcohol can’t be helping, and would really like to stop that too, but it’s about the only thing that helps me get some sleep.
Before anyone suggests it, I have an appointment with my GP to discuss this next week, and again, I’m really not after sympathy, purely other people’s experiences and opinions. It’s been quite difficult to type this out, and particularly to hit 'submit', there’s a whole shedload more, but I think this is long enough already.
Thanks for reading and for anything you might be able to add.
I'm not exactly a regular poster in here, but wanted to hear some advice/opinions/experiences from fellow PHers. I also thought it might be therapeutic in some way or another to talk about it. I do need to stress though, I am not after sympathy.
I guess I should probably tell you a bit about myself, and as I'm sure you've gathered from the title of this thread, it's not going to be about hitting the gym.
I'm 24, I've been smoking cannabis since I was 14, more or less constantly, I've also been drinking quite heavily (on and off) for a few years now. I'm a bit of a loner, have very few friends, and those I do have are either through drugs, or through work. I seem to struggle socially, find it quite difficult to make friends and talk to people freely, hate going out to pubs or clubs, would much rather stay in and watch motorsport or drive the ‘ring on my Playstation.
There was a point a few years ago, I think I was about 19, when I was headed down a very dark path, far harder drugs, the wrong sorts of people, and being arrested a few times. I managed to stop that (I like to think that in part this was due to PH, and my complete addiction to cars, and the engineering involved), but couldn’t stop cannabis, and that was when I started drinking a fair bit too.
So 4 years of constant smoking and regular drinking followed, and I guess I convinced myself that that lifestyle was ok, and I could manage that indefinitely.
In short that brings us up to now. I split up with the girl I was going to marry about a year ago (not solely due to my drug/alcohol usage, but we were both a mess), and that screwed me up hugely, still have huge feelings for her, and I have no idea if they’re reciprocated. Right now, I don’t think I can deal with finding out.
And that brings me nicely onto why I’m posting this. I stopped smoking cannabis last Friday, for good, I’m 6 days in, haven’t even felt an urge. But every day since I’m having these feelings I can only really describe as anxiety attacks mixed with intense depression. I’ve always suffered from mild depression, had extreme mood swings and that sort of thing, but never had these consistent feelings of… uneasiness and fear I suppose. I’m quite worried that they aren’t going to stop. I also can’t sleep, the most I’ve gotten is 2 hours in the past 6 days.
I think alcohol can’t be helping, and would really like to stop that too, but it’s about the only thing that helps me get some sleep.
Before anyone suggests it, I have an appointment with my GP to discuss this next week, and again, I’m really not after sympathy, purely other people’s experiences and opinions. It’s been quite difficult to type this out, and particularly to hit 'submit', there’s a whole shedload more, but I think this is long enough already.
Thanks for reading and for anything you might be able to add.
Thanks guys. It's certainly helped my current mindset just reading your responses.
Mintyhit - I think you're definitely onto something there with exercise helping, I have found that just going for a walk does help hugely with whatever mood I'm in. I'm sure it'll also help with getting some sleep.
897sma said:
Be careful you don't swap one crutch for another and let your drinking become a problem too. Drink does not help you sleep, it just helps you pass out. Try a few nights without a drink and see how much more tired you feel at bedtime.
You're absolutely right of course, and I'm very aware how careful I need to be. I think I'll give your suggestion a try this evening and see how I manage. Mintyhit - I think you're definitely onto something there with exercise helping, I have found that just going for a walk does help hugely with whatever mood I'm in. I'm sure it'll also help with getting some sleep.
Edited by cocopop on Thursday 27th December 10:37
Only just had a chance to catch up on this since yesterday, thanks for all the responses.
Still firmly on track, and this morning things seem to have improved. I managed to sleep properly last night for the first time in a good few days, also minus booze, which was very nice. It’s been a really long time since I woke up feeling quite this clear headed. My appetite also seems to be coming back.
The plan for the weekend and New Year’s Eve is to stay well away from anything which may tempt me and get out on my bike for some proper exercise.
I’ll keep the thread updated with my progress, it is really helping – thanks everyone!
Still firmly on track, and this morning things seem to have improved. I managed to sleep properly last night for the first time in a good few days, also minus booze, which was very nice. It’s been a really long time since I woke up feeling quite this clear headed. My appetite also seems to be coming back.
The plan for the weekend and New Year’s Eve is to stay well away from anything which may tempt me and get out on my bike for some proper exercise.
I’ll keep the thread updated with my progress, it is really helping – thanks everyone!
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