Monkey crashes Porsche

[Conscript]

warch said:

I used to ride my bike on that section of road every single day commuting between Bristol and Hereford. It is indeed very narrow and greasy at this time of year. Last time I went that way they'd closed the northbound lane due to rocks falling down off the adjacent cliffside so CH was actually driving through the traffic lights (you can see cones and concrete barriers in the background, if can take your eyes away from the battered Porsche). It is possible the truck was something to do with the repair work and was manoeuvring out of the cordon.

Off topic, but, bloody hell! That's what, 50 miles? I know that's not really too far to ride on a road bike, but every day, for work? Good on you

EDIT: What an utter comprehension fail. For some reason, the existence of motorbikes escaped me for a moment and I was convinced you meant cycling. I need to go home...

Edited by Conscript on Tuesday 13th November 14:22

[Equus]

fakenews said:

You can guarantee those on this thread who believe they can avoid any accident will one day hit a herd of deer who suddenly career over a bank and into their path.

As they struggle for breath under the bloodied scrotum of a mortally wounded 300lb stag they may realise how wrong they were.

Well, there was a thread a few months back where someone had hit a deer, on a straight, open road.

All I can say is that despite living in areas that are absolutely teeming with deer, badgers, foxes, wild boar, and the rest, I've yet to hit one, or even so much as a hedgehog or rabbit, in 30-odd years of driving. Maybe I'm incredibly lucky. Maybe I just drive with the care appropriate to the environment I'm driving in (you develop a '6th sense' for deer in particular). Take your pick.

Bizarrely, I think I did once hit a bat (or he hit me, not sure which - it was the roof, rather than the windscreen).

[Equus]

Seesure said:

Wrong side of the water for boar... at the moment

More likely deer of various sizes...

I thought they'd got across the Wye? I thought it was the Severn that they hadn't managed to bypass yet?


edited to add: Google agrees with me: link

Edited by Equus on Tuesday 13th November 14:26

[Seesure]

Equus said:

I thought they'd got across the Wye? I thought it was the Severn that they hadn't managed to bypass yet?

I believe there are some in Monmouthshire which have crossed the river up at Symonds Yat - but getting around Monmouth would be their challenge to get to the Tintern, Brockweir and Chepstow stretch although theoretically they could swim.

The Severn would also be a challenge but there is some supposedly around Swindon (probably dumped), I seem to recall someone was killed on the M4 due to a boar on the motorway a couple years back around there.

Fallow deer and others would be my concern on that stretch of road, also I wonder if having only just being re-opened on Friday after weeks of being closed added to lower risk expectations of both drivers?

[Equus]

Seesure said:

I believe there are some in Monmouthshire which have crossed the river up at Symonds Yat - but getting around Monmouth would be their challenge to get to the Tintern, Brockweir and Chepstow stretch although theoretically they could swim.

Well, the link I gave immediately above seems to confirm that they have reached Tintern. Perhaps they have managed to cross the river further South than Monmouth?

Edited by Equus on Tuesday 13th November 14:52

[Pro Bono]

The accident happened as they were producing an episode of TG, so with any luck it might have been caught on film.

If nothing else, the prospect of seeing CH smashing up a Porsche should provide a much needed (if temporary) boost to the TG viewing figures. It'd be more viewable than most of his stuff.

[Tankrizzo]

My parents live in Trellech so I know the area very well. That is a very, very stupid place to be doing a turn in the road.

[LotusOmega375D]

These TV motoring journalists do wreck a lot of cars don't they? Maybe they're in the wrong job?

[anonymous-user]

Conscript said:

Off topic, but, bloody hell! That's what, 50 miles? I know that's not really too far to ride on a road bike, but every day, for work? Good on you

EDIT: What an utter comprehension fail. For some reason, the existence of motorbikes escaped me for a moment and I was convinced you meant cycling. I need to go home...

Edited by anonymous-user on Tuesday 13th November 14:22

Not just you. I thought that too

[lyonspride]

Equus said:

fakenews said:

You can guarantee those on this thread who believe they can avoid any accident will one day hit a herd of deer who suddenly career over a bank and into their path.

As they struggle for breath under the bloodied scrotum of a mortally wounded 300lb stag they may realise how wrong they were.

Well, there was a thread a few months back where someone had hit a deer, on a straight, open road.

All I can say is that despite living in areas that are absolutely teeming with deer, badgers, foxes, wild boar, and the rest, I've yet to hit one, or even so much as a hedgehog or rabbit, in 30-odd years of driving. Maybe I'm incredibly lucky. Maybe I just drive with the care appropriate to the environment I'm driving in (you develop a '6th sense' for deer in particular). Take your pick.

Bizarrely, I think I did once hit a bat (or he hit me, not sure which - it was the roof, rather than the windscreen).

And how many times have to had to taken evasive action to successfully avoid one of the above?

I hit a badger, but I have never had to take action to avoid one, nor have I ever even seen a live badger on a main A road.

I've seen plenty of rabbits and squirrels, but who in their right mind tries to avoid those? When the most likely outcome is the vermin get hit anyway and you end up in a ditch.....

[Equus]

lyonspride said:

And how many times have to had to taken evasive action to successfully avoid one of the above?

I hit a badger, but I have never had to take action to avoid one, nor have I ever even seen a live badger on a main A road.

I've seen plenty of rabbits and squirrels, but who in their right mind tries to avoid those? When the most likely outcome is the vermin get hit anyway and you end up in a ditch.....

If by 'evasive action' you mean slow down a bit more and wait for it to get out of the way, then plenty. I don't go in for the full-on Elk Test - I've never had to, driving at appropriate speed. I've certainly had to steer around wild boar in the Forest of Dean, where they've decided that they own the road and aren't about to move for anyone, but only after having slowed to an almost complete standstill.

You're in the wrong part of the country, or going out at the wrong time of day, if you've never seen a live badger on a main A-road... try the A38 or A46 in South Gloucestershire (just the other side of the Severn from Monkey's crash, in fact), in the early hours of the morning.

[warch]

I once rounded a tight corner, more or less exactly where Arris had his accident and encountered a lump of stone roughly the same size as a washing machine sitting in the carriageway. Which incidentally is why they've starting work on reinforcing the cliff face. Luckily it was pissing it down so I'd slowed down.


Yes over a year of commuting by bike in all weathers was pretty hardcore, especially with an early 90s Honda's effing useless headlight, but it did teach me a hell of a lot of roadcraft. Anyone whose ever commuted through Hereford and Bristol will understand why two wheels was the only option though.

[louismchuge]

warch said:

I once rounded a tight corner, more or less exactly where Arris had his accident and encountered a lump of stone roughly the same size as a washing machine sitting in the carriageway. Which incidentally is why they've starting work on reinforcing the cliff face. Luckily it was pissing it down so I'd slowed down.


Yes over a year of commuting by bike in all weathers was pretty hardcore, especially with an early 90s Honda's effing useless headlight, but it did teach me a hell of a lot of roadcraft. Anyone whose ever commuted through Hereford and Bristol will understand why two wheels was the only option though.

Being from Hereford, I couldn't agree more.

[bonesX]

How many did TG presenter Tiff total, including borrowed classics?

Seem to remember all that monkeying getting just a slight raised eyebrow and sniggers...

[shambolic]

Couple of years back 2 young lads killed on a country road near Loch Lomond.
Guy In an artic decided to straddle across both lanes of single carriageway to reverse into a private drive for a delivery in the dark.
Boy comes round the bend and sliced roof and heads off going under side skirts of lorry.
Driver charged and found guilty of deaths.
I’ll try and dig out newspaper report online.

[Davislove]

I wonder how much they pay him to use his own pride and joy on a work gig??

[shost]

Perfectly possible to drive to distance you can see clear, definitely not 100% unavoidable accident. That said, driving into a high vehicle in a low car is going to cause a lot of damage at any speed and I'd be surprised if speed was that high at point of impact. But combo of greasy roads and cold weather going to increase stopping distance beyond what he might have expected.

Don't know why some saying the truck suddenly turned. All the article and Harris have said same. He rounded corner to see broadside truck doing three point turn.

Harris fortunate the obstruction wasn't a fallen bike or rider etc. But I wasn't there and police clearly don't think any blame for him!

I just wish drivers I see on narrow roads would use some common sense and expect an oncoming vehicle rather than be surprised by one. Seems a few on here confirm my suspicion that they hope nothing coming and speed along regardless!

[joefraser]

Equus said:

Well, there was a thread a few months back where someone had hit a deer, on a straight, open road.

All I can say is that despite living in areas that are absolutely teeming with deer, badgers, foxes, wild boar, and the rest, I've yet to hit one, or even so much as a hedgehog or rabbit, in 30-odd years of driving. Maybe I'm incredibly lucky. Maybe I just drive with the care appropriate to the environment I'm driving in (you develop a '6th sense' for deer in particular). Take your pick.

Bizarrely, I think I did once hit a bat (or he hit me, not sure which - it was the roof, rather than the windscreen).

Aussie's have the 6th sense for kangaroo's. I did 35000 kilometers in a year there with plenty of night driving right around the country and only just started to get a feeling for the jumpy bds.

Almost got caught out 3 times, the only thing i hit in all that time was a falling branch during a storm thankfully.

[warch]

In other threads I've often heard criticism of bikers for slowing down too much into corners. Things like unexpected items in the road is why we have to do this, because bikes are really rather poor when you combine the need to corner, brake or swerve or some combination thereof. In a car you can usually take evasive action, including braking whilst cornering which is bad practice but doable.

As already pointed out I can't see any possible reason to do a three point turn in the road at this point unless the pickup was site traffic leaving the cordon. I imagine they could have left in the direction the vehicle was pointed in but didn't because they didn't want to come back through the traffic lights.

[Pericoloso]

Cold said:

Oh, and a shout out to the person who reported "Monkey" to the PH mods as being racist slang!

Welshbeef's wrong explanation of how he got the monkey nickname remains though.

How do you know someone pressed report ,was there a "thread prune" ?