Best smoker barges 1-5 large [Vol 13]

[cornershop]

Slow said:

Plans to ruin it basically

im all for inclusion but I think you’re on the wrong thread

[SpeckledJim]

Slow said:

Looking for a barge around December time as it’s when the bargains seem to be. Should find something for sub £2k which I can break when done for minimal loss.

Plans to ruin it basically, currently rolling with the idea of 4.4 Petrol Range Rover.

Always wanted a “mad max/rat rod” looking car and barges seem to be the best for this in my eyes.

I understand you will all hate me, but what car would phers recommend. Not a Merc s class as even I am scared of their electrics!

[squinty futurama meme]

[Jim the Sunderer]

That purple Mercedes-Benz estate, oh yes.

I suspect I'm going to miss my chance for one of those.

[Croutons]

Slow said:

Looking for a barge around December time as it’s when the bargains seem to be. Should find something for sub £2k which I can break when done for minimal loss.

Plans to ruin it basically, currently rolling with the idea of 4.4 Petrol Range Rover.

Always wanted a “mad max/rat rod” looking car and barges seem to be the best for this in my eyes.

I understand you will all hate me, but what car would phers recommend. Not a Merc s class as even I am scared of their electrics!

January sees better bargains, and pre-chavved will save you the effort, and should be priced sufficiently cheaply anyway.

Like this actually-quite-fetching Honda Legend 3.5V6, £1250. Unlikely to find a cherished one owner example for that.

http://forum.retro-rides.org/thread/205217/1997-ho...

[greenarrow]

slk 32 said:

SpeckledJim said:

CharlesdeGaulle said:

olly755 said:

r129sl said:

I thought this sort of thing only happened to me. I too am thinking of going modern...

Sadly me too. I love barging and old cars as much as the next man. But the fact that there is always some niggle to attend to or stress over becomes wearing over time.

For fks sake men, what's going on? The Empire wasn't built with this kind of attitude. 'Modern' ... 'stress' ... where's your phlegmatic spunk?

Exactly this. Give your heads a wobble.

A bad month in your barge is approximately the same cost as two ordinary months in a borrowed mugglemobile.

How often does that happen? Once or twice a year? And for that you get a life less ordinary, and the ability to embarrass your children at will, without even needing to access your wardrobe.

Precisely nobody is pleased to see you when you arrive in a new Audi A6. You won't even be pleased to be you. Surely this is obvious!?

Hold the line, brothers. Hold the line.

The way I see it is we have three options:

1. Buy new / nearly new. This should buy you reliability (but no guarantee) with the concomitant trade off of massive depreciation. Then after 3 years repeat the process and take another kidney punch to the wallet.

2. Lease something. Anything vaguely interesting is circa £350-400 a month for something you have to hand back after 2-4 years with nothing to show for it. I'm not sure I'd be willing to see this leave my account each month just to have something new sat outside my house

3. Carry on barging. Older, larger engined cars that outside this thread have very little appeal to 'normal' people but have hit the bottom of the depreciation curve and aside from the occasional large bill (and fuel) are pretty good value compared to options one and two.

I go for a slight variation on Option 1 for my main motor. I favour buying rep favourite saloon/hatches when they're about 5 or 6 years old and therefore worth 25% or less of original purchase price. Keep for 3 or 4 years and move on. That way I feel I get a car that's still reasonably modern with the attached comforts, but unlikely to depreciate an awful lot. Reliability is the main thing not guaranteed, but I've done fairly well so far. My current Insignia has had a few little bills this year, but in truth when added up its less than a grand a year, so maybe 3 or 4 months worth of rental payments....

Then I like to own a cheap interesting second car for recreational purchases.

Certainly its true that new cars aren't automatically better. One example, ride quality. Bloody awful on most moderns, especially an Insignia on 18 inch wheels. I've been using my daughters little Mk1 Ford Ka around town. It has tiny little 13 inch wheels and absolutely wonderful ride quality. Doesn't bat an eye lid at the worst of the local rat runs. All these old Mercs and Jags are the same. Waft along so much better than a modern.

Oh dear, gone right off topic now.

Love that Merc Estate. I'd happily give a home to one of those....

[Slow]

SpeckledJim said:

Slow said:

Looking for a barge around December time as it’s when the bargains seem to be. Should find something for sub £2k which I can break when done for minimal loss.

Plans to ruin it basically, currently rolling with the idea of 4.4 Petrol Range Rover.

Always wanted a “mad max/rat rod” looking car and barges seem to be the best for this in my eyes.

I understand you will all hate me, but what car would phers recommend. Not a Merc s class as even I am scared of their electrics!

[squinty futurama meme]

Had 2x l322, mums got one and her boyfriend has 2 just now. Got full doganostic software and generally know a lot about them now.

I’m actually not 100% mad!

[K12beano]

slk 32 said:

Carry on Barging.

Really?

Do you think there’d be any profit in making a film of this thread?

Could I do the Kenneth Connor part?

[SpeckledJim]

You should clean the lens on your potato.

[layercake]

dbdb said:

phil_cardiff said:

slk 32 said:

The way I see it is we have three options:

1. Buy new / nearly new. This should buy you reliability (but no guarantee) with the concomitant trade off of massive depreciation. Then after 3 years repeat the process and take another kidney punch to the wallet.

2. Lease something. Anything vaguely interesting is circa £350-400 a month for something you have to hand back after 2-4 years with nothing to show for it. I'm not sure I'd be willing to see this leave my account each month just to have something new sat outside my house

3. Carry on barging. Older, larger engined cars that outside this thread have very little appeal to 'normal' people but have hit the bottom of the depreciation curve and aside from the occasional large bill (and fuel) are pretty good value compared to options one and two.

My Dad typically goes for option 1 but then runs the car for years and years. Works reasonably well.

My late father tended to do the same: buy new, then keep it for a long time.

I would add an option 4 in there. Barge and a shed has worked great for me. Altho the temptation to buy more barges is hard to stop. I had 4 barges at one point then back to one. I reckon a nice big barge whatever does it for you ie w124 or e39 or a LS and a nice two seater .. r129 or a z3 or both
And not forgetting the daily shed which in my case is a 18 yo w203 currently touching 250,000 miles

[anonymous-user]

SpeckledJim said:

You should clean the lens on your potato.

Thanks

[Scooobydont]

Quite a good project just gone up on detailing world, chap is restoring a Daimler Super V8:

http://www.detailingworld.co.uk/forum/showthread.p...

He has identified the worst of it and is about to start sorting it. Thought some of you guys might appreciate it.

[tobinen]

Ah yes, Chris from the Jag forum. He had a W220 for a while as well.

That Super V8 was for sale on the Jag forum with a big dent in the NSR quarter. I am surprised he's taken it on but he must have the spare time/be single/doormat Mrs.

[anonymous-user]

Nickbrapp in the Spotted Ordinary Abandoned Vehicles thread said:

The same place also had a yard full of mk1 veteras, 1st gen c classes old A4 etc

Good enough to save?

[r129sl]

^^^ I doubt it. It'll probably start on a new battery with a gallon of fresh fuel but 300 SEs are still in plentiful supply for not a lot of money. I'd imagine the underside of that one might be very rusty with all that wet foliage.

[SpeckledJim]

Slow said:

SpeckledJim said:

Slow said:

Looking for a barge around December time as it’s when the bargains seem to be. Should find something for sub £2k which I can break when done for minimal loss.

Plans to ruin it basically, currently rolling with the idea of 4.4 Petrol Range Rover.

Always wanted a “mad max/rat rod” looking car and barges seem to be the best for this in my eyes.

I understand you will all hate me, but what car would phers recommend. Not a Merc s class as even I am scared of their electrics!

[squinty futurama meme]

Had 2x l322, mums got one and her boyfriend has 2 just now. Got full doganostic software and generally know a lot about them now.

I’m actually not 100% mad!

Does that software tell you what to do when your car is running a bit ruff?

[Slow]

SpeckledJim said:

Slow said:

SpeckledJim said:

Slow said:

Looking for a barge around December time as it’s when the bargains seem to be. Should find something for sub £2k which I can break when done for minimal loss.

Plans to ruin it basically, currently rolling with the idea of 4.4 Petrol Range Rover.

Always wanted a “mad max/rat rod” looking car and barges seem to be the best for this in my eyes.

I understand you will all hate me, but what car would phers recommend. Not a Merc s class as even I am scared of their electrics!

[squinty futurama meme]

Had 2x l322, mums got one and her boyfriend has 2 just now. Got full doganostic software and generally know a lot about them now.

I’m actually not 100% mad!

Does that software tell you what to do when your car is running a bit ruff?

Haha didn’t even notice. Good spot

[CharlesdeGaulle]

sleepera6 said:

SpeckledJim said:

You should clean the lens on your potato.

Thanks

I'm just grateful you obscured the number plates; the urge to copy them was almost irresistible.

[ReaperCushions]

Some top barging from Doug Demuro today:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=litO7FrTwDI

[E65Ross]

Slow said:

SpeckledJim said:

Slow said:

SpeckledJim said:

Slow said:

Looking for a barge around December time as it’s when the bargains seem to be. Should find something for sub £2k which I can break when done for minimal loss.

Plans to ruin it basically, currently rolling with the idea of 4.4 Petrol Range Rover.

Always wanted a “mad max/rat rod” looking car and barges seem to be the best for this in my eyes.

I understand you will all hate me, but what car would phers recommend. Not a Merc s class as even I am scared of their electrics!

[squinty futurama meme]

Had 2x l322, mums got one and her boyfriend has 2 just now. Got full doganostic software and generally know a lot about them now.

I’m actually not 100% mad!

Does that software tell you what to do when your car is running a bit ruff?

Haha didn’t even notice. Good spot

Is Spot the name of your doganostic?

[C Lee Farquar]

SpeckledJim said:

There's some kind of weird group hysteria going on. I want to give everyone an e-shake.

A Jaguar XJ8 costs £1500 and is nicer than a new Audi A6 in every single way apart from headlamps and bluetooth.

If I was to say 'stay off the Esperanto, and don't go anywhere near the Despair Squid', would anyone know what I was on about?

Has some disgruntled moderator re-titled the 'Boring Boring Boring Wish I was dead £25-50k' thread as a wind-up?

Yep. I had barge blues and leased a Ford Wildtrak earlier in the year assuming it wouldn't throw up random warnings as the BM 760 seems to this year.

The Ford doesn't, but it moans if I don't have a seat belt on, if I leave the keys in, or lights on, gives constant disclaimers about the sat nav. It bings and bongs all the time and has two LED screens. It's like an overbearing wife. I've driven it twice and hate it. Obviously the rest of the fleet, RR softdash V8, BMW and 300 tdi Discovery Commercial have all been immaculately behaved ever since, so it does serve one useful purpose.