What has your "friend" been up to?

[vaud]

CharlesdeGaulle said:

Whenever my friend has booked into a hotel without his (then) wife he spookily 'bumped into' an attractive tall brunette. Happened quite a lot and ended up him without a wife. The brunette fked off too. I hope your friend's evening is more fruitful.

My friend hasn't got the energy or intent.

[Justin Case]

My friend was discharged from hospital yesterday following an operation the previous day. amongst the obvious no-nos like not driving or climbing ladders, he was advised not to sign any legal documents until he was fully recovered. Do the Sandwell and West Birmingham Hospitals Trust know something about the legal profession that the rest of us are unaware of?

Edited by Justin Case on Saturday 31st October 17:01

[Honk]

Yeah. Rent it.

[anonymous-user]

Tyre Smoke said:

Breadvan72 said:

My friend was thinking of making himself a Martini when he was reminded by his wife that he has until midnight to do his VAT return, failing which he will get his nadgers kicked in by some people who work for the government. Oh well, on with the motley!

Your friend has until 7th November actually. My friend recommends a gin martini. Wet and dirty.

FPWM. My friend has been overseas and was de-registered for VAT for a while, and he has forgotten the drill.

He is going to have a Plymouth Gin Martini with a twist. NOPE: a better idea - he is going to make it a Gibson. Cheers!

[CanAm]

Breadvan72 said:

No he wasn't. You evidently have not read any of the books.

Bond looks like Hoagy Carmichael. He is a toff. In character, he is closest to the man portrayed by Dalton. Bond is a cold hearted murderer.

My friend is pleased to read your mention of the much overlooked Hoagy Carmichael.

[anonymous-user]

Carmichael was a great performer! He's in one of the Bogart and Bacall movies but I cannot now recall which one,

[anonymous-user]

My friends just been in a meeting where the 'CFO' has said he'll resign if I do another lockdown.

[anonymous-user]

CharlesdeGaulle said:

Whenever my friend has booked into a hotel without his (then) wife he spookily 'bumped into' an attractive tall brunette. Happened quite a lot and ended up him without a wife. The brunette fked off too. I hope your friend's evening is more fruitful.

Brown's Hotel in London had two doors, one on Dover Street and one on Albermarle Sreet. Traditionally, the wife (or mistress) would enter through one door whilst the mistress (or wife) was exiting through the other door.

In my friend's case, the person whom he bumped into at hotels was a tall blonde. She also fked off soon after the first wife did. My friend later married a non tall blonde, whom people wrongly and unfairly assume was to blame for his first wife fking off.

[nonsequitur]

CanAm said:

Breadvan72 said:

No he wasn't. You evidently have not read any of the books.

Bond looks like Hoagy Carmichael. He is a toff. In character, he is closest to the man portrayed by Dalton. Bond is a cold hearted murderer.

My friend is pleased to read your mention of the much overlooked Hoagy Carmichael.

In one of the books (?) Bond reminded one of the 'Bond Girls' of Hoagy Carmichael. Not an actual description by Ian Fleming. Fleming describes Bond as 'A saturnine, cruel look with a comma of hair dropping over his forehead and a white scar down one cheek'.

It is said that Timothy Dalton is the closest to the Bond description in the books.

Posting for a friend,

Edited by nonsequitur on Saturday 31st October 18:52

[JeremyH5]

Breadvan72 said:

Tyre Smoke said:

Breadvan72 said:

My friend was thinking of making himself a Martini when he was reminded by his wife that he has until midnight to do his VAT return, failing which he will get his nadgers kicked in by some people who work for the government. Oh well, on with the motley!

Your friend has until 7th November actually. My friend recommends a gin martini. Wet and dirty.

FPWM. My friend has been overseas and was de-registered for VAT for a while, and he has forgotten the drill.

He is going to have a Plymouth Gin Martini with a twist. NOPE: a better idea - he is going to make it a Gibson. Cheers!

My friend has a nagging feeling that whilst you have until 7th November to pay you only have until midnight tonight to submit said VAT return.
My friend will be happy for you if this feeling is not right. Chin chin!

[JeremyH5]

My friend regrets his feeling. I asked him to double check. He has now done so and the 7th November applies to the submission as well as payment.
As you were.

[vaud]

My friend recommends a dry martini, the scallops with seared duck and a glass of gavi di gavi , followed by 60 day aged fillet steak with a light horse radish mash and bordelaise sauce with a carafe of a very nice saint emillion.

Dessert beckons for my friend.

[anonymous-user]

Mon ami dit: bon continuation!

[talksthetorque]

The only thing to do with tax my friend had to do until January 31st is SORN his motorbike, which he has done after Boris’s friend started orating.
My friend noticed that Boris’s friend did this -unusually - without much stuttering. I wonder whether he had a cocktail or two or just abstained to achieve this

[Justin Case]

talksthetorque said:

My friend noticed that Boris’s friend did this -unusually - without much stuttering. I wonder whether he had a cocktail or two or just abstained to achieve this

My friend thinks it more likely that his friend had mislaid his 'Jeeves and Wooster' DVD and didn't have the opportunity to practise his carefully cultivated 'likeable upper class idiot' image and the real 'cynical politician' one momentarily crept out.

[vaud]

Breadvan72 said:

Mon ami dit: bon continuation!

My friend says it was remarkable- an incredibly light (his words) apple soufflé with cinnamon sugar and a scoop of brown butter ice cream. He was a fool as he missed the dessert wine list.

[whoami]

vaud said:

My friend says it was remarkable- an incredibly light (his words) apple soufflé with cinnamon sugar and a scoop of brown butter ice cream. He was a fool as he missed the dessert wine list.

My friend enjoys The Pheasant, too.

[citizensm1th]

My friend may have taken his wife out for a delightful Italian meal at San giovani near Atherstone and had a lovely passion fruit creme brulie.

My friend may have also invited the waitress back to his for passion fruit vodka cocktails when she finished her shift

What is most strange about tonight is my friend has Gotten home unscathed with a happy wife!!!!!

[slopes]

citizensm1th said:

My friend may have taken his wife out for a delightful Italian meal at San giovani near Atherstone and had a lovely passion fruit creme brulie.

My friend may have also invited the waitress back to his for passion fruit vodka cocktails when she finished her shift

What is most strange about tonight is my friend has Gotten home unscathed with a happy wife!!!!!

My friend thinks your wife is either very understanding and likes to play or you are going to be minus you plums if and when this waitress turns up at your gaff.
My friend knows his wife would remove his plums with a wooden spoon if he tried that one.

[CanAm]

What has my friend been up to? "Bugger all" apparently. He tells me some long overdue "Ugandan negotiations" were on the cards this afternoon. What does "FML" mean? He doesn't look a happy man. I wish he'd speak bloody English.