VMAX 12 Awards - A Light Hearted Look Back
Discussion
Well, firstly, what a superb day it was! Perhaps if anything it was a little too hot (okay, far too bloody hot), but the parasols and the gazebos came out, and we were mostly okay.
The cars performed amazingly well in spite of the heat, and I wasn't aware of any major overheating issues?
So here we are, an irreverent look back at July 2nd.....
Award for Fingerprint Removal - Honda NSX - Trackdemon
Folks - let this serve as a warning - the skinny spare in the front of an NSX gets BLOODY hot. Good Samaritan moi decided to help poor old Steve out after his flat tyre, and jumped into getting the spare out and inflating it. What I only realised moments later is that the main radiator on these glorious machines is about 6" in front of the spare, so it gets rather a lot of indirect heat. Steve, I'm sure you could peel my fingerprints off and use them on a heist mate!
Award for "Sex Face" of the Day - Rude Girl
Having never engaged in such relations with our lovely RG, this is pure speculation on my part. However, we were all treated to a marvellous post-climatic look on her Chevy Chase as she stepped out of Davids RUF tickled GT2. Indeed, I commented to her "You look like you've just come, dear" as she stepped out of said chariot, causing her to wipe the tops of her thighs very quickly. Bless 'er!
Award for "Thank you God, Thank you so Bloody Much" Type Ranting - Derestrictor
Well, he may come from Bolton, but you've got to feel a twinge of sympathy for our resident Nowvan gibbon. The Beetle looked spendid, but alas, the intercooler hose threw its toys out of its pram - AGAIN, and, coupled with the sad looking splitter at the end, it wasn't the Shopkeepers day. Still, a bit of gaffer tape and fettling from resident spanner Fearns, and he was good to make the 1,500 mile journey back from whence he came. In fact, I can exclusively reveal the future maladies to be incflicted upon this poor car:
i) At VMAX 13, DeR will suffer 4 punctures, and thanks to the generosity of the VMAX Pork faithful, will scrounge 4 space savers for the journey home - at a steady 50mph;
ii) The next modification to lil' 'Splurter will entail a full "Citroen C4 conversion", where at will, it will transform to an upright dancing robot, performing Bez-style freaky dancing complete with Manthey Racing maraccas.
Award for Busmans' Holiday - Andy Fearns
Poor sod. Was there a Porsche that Andy didn't fix during the day? I think not!
Award for the Nicest Sunhat - MOD500
Unanimous vote here - the mild mannered Martyn becomes Yorkshirist Steve Irwin shocker!
Don Estelle Lookalike Award - MarkBe
Well, the only whispering was Marks superb Kleemann wagon, not the grass, but I had the urge to bellow "Sing Lofty, sing" at him on more than one occasion....
Future gay icon Award - CraigW
Clearly spending far too much time at the gym, and going topless for the afternoon, pure bloody man fodder. Sorry fellas, he's spoken for!
Bloody Nice Bloke Award - Dazren
Picture the scene - DeR bemoaning his stray intercooler pipe and 993TT ownership in general; without prompting, Uncle Daz hands over the keys to his slightly more reliable steed to let our man vent some frustration. DeR comes back with smile duly returned to face. Folks - this epitomises VMAX to me, and at the centre of it was the Duke of Bristol. Legend.
The "Christ....so YOU'RE....<insert PH name>" Award - Uncle Dave
Casually asked Neil_Cardiff where his passenger was, Neil replied "Oh - he's over there..." Fully expected some Nick Mason-a-like, but clearly Dave is about 16!! Good to meet you sir, and hope you enjoyed the day.
The It Wouldn't be an Awards Ceremony Without... Award - God
Well, we might not get into Alton Towers on certain days, and we are curiously dissuaded from dressing up like EasyJet employees and banging tambourines, but you've got to give it to the Almighty. Splendid weather just this side of sultry, and okay, maybe the Satanic forced induction massive were praying for slightly more oxygenated and denser air, but conclusive proof that our God is most definitely bigger than Theirs.
Praise be!
Greg
The cars performed amazingly well in spite of the heat, and I wasn't aware of any major overheating issues?
So here we are, an irreverent look back at July 2nd.....
Award for Fingerprint Removal - Honda NSX - Trackdemon
Folks - let this serve as a warning - the skinny spare in the front of an NSX gets BLOODY hot. Good Samaritan moi decided to help poor old Steve out after his flat tyre, and jumped into getting the spare out and inflating it. What I only realised moments later is that the main radiator on these glorious machines is about 6" in front of the spare, so it gets rather a lot of indirect heat. Steve, I'm sure you could peel my fingerprints off and use them on a heist mate!
Award for "Sex Face" of the Day - Rude Girl
Having never engaged in such relations with our lovely RG, this is pure speculation on my part. However, we were all treated to a marvellous post-climatic look on her Chevy Chase as she stepped out of Davids RUF tickled GT2. Indeed, I commented to her "You look like you've just come, dear" as she stepped out of said chariot, causing her to wipe the tops of her thighs very quickly. Bless 'er!
Award for "Thank you God, Thank you so Bloody Much" Type Ranting - Derestrictor
Well, he may come from Bolton, but you've got to feel a twinge of sympathy for our resident Nowvan gibbon. The Beetle looked spendid, but alas, the intercooler hose threw its toys out of its pram - AGAIN, and, coupled with the sad looking splitter at the end, it wasn't the Shopkeepers day. Still, a bit of gaffer tape and fettling from resident spanner Fearns, and he was good to make the 1,500 mile journey back from whence he came. In fact, I can exclusively reveal the future maladies to be incflicted upon this poor car:
i) At VMAX 13, DeR will suffer 4 punctures, and thanks to the generosity of the VMAX Pork faithful, will scrounge 4 space savers for the journey home - at a steady 50mph;
ii) The next modification to lil' 'Splurter will entail a full "Citroen C4 conversion", where at will, it will transform to an upright dancing robot, performing Bez-style freaky dancing complete with Manthey Racing maraccas.
Award for Busmans' Holiday - Andy Fearns
Poor sod. Was there a Porsche that Andy didn't fix during the day? I think not!
Award for the Nicest Sunhat - MOD500
Unanimous vote here - the mild mannered Martyn becomes Yorkshirist Steve Irwin shocker!
Don Estelle Lookalike Award - MarkBe
Well, the only whispering was Marks superb Kleemann wagon, not the grass, but I had the urge to bellow "Sing Lofty, sing" at him on more than one occasion....
Future gay icon Award - CraigW
Clearly spending far too much time at the gym, and going topless for the afternoon, pure bloody man fodder. Sorry fellas, he's spoken for!
Bloody Nice Bloke Award - Dazren
Picture the scene - DeR bemoaning his stray intercooler pipe and 993TT ownership in general; without prompting, Uncle Daz hands over the keys to his slightly more reliable steed to let our man vent some frustration. DeR comes back with smile duly returned to face. Folks - this epitomises VMAX to me, and at the centre of it was the Duke of Bristol. Legend.
The "Christ....so YOU'RE....<insert PH name>" Award - Uncle Dave
Casually asked Neil_Cardiff where his passenger was, Neil replied "Oh - he's over there..." Fully expected some Nick Mason-a-like, but clearly Dave is about 16!! Good to meet you sir, and hope you enjoyed the day.
The It Wouldn't be an Awards Ceremony Without... Award - God
Well, we might not get into Alton Towers on certain days, and we are curiously dissuaded from dressing up like EasyJet employees and banging tambourines, but you've got to give it to the Almighty. Splendid weather just this side of sultry, and okay, maybe the Satanic forced induction massive were praying for slightly more oxygenated and denser air, but conclusive proof that our God is most definitely bigger than Theirs.
Praise be!
Greg Edited by GregE240 on Monday 3rd July 11:02
. did'nt know I was That good looking.
.
Well said, Greg.
Glad you liked my hat, will put another shrimp on the barby for you, sport.
I concur regards Craig also, a friend of mine who is that way inclined tells me the publication of choice pertaining to such matters is called 'Colt'. Maybe Craig will soon grace its cover and centre fold?
Glad you liked my hat, will put another shrimp on the barby for you, sport.
I concur regards Craig also, a friend of mine who is that way inclined tells me the publication of choice pertaining to such matters is called 'Colt'. Maybe Craig will soon grace its cover and centre fold?
MOD500 said:
Well said, Greg.
Glad you liked my hat, will put another shrimp on the barby for you, sport.
I concur regards Craig also, a friend of mine who is that way inclined tells me the publication of choice pertaining to such matters is called 'Colt'. Maybe Craig will soon grace its cover and centre fold?
Glad you liked my hat, will put another shrimp on the barby for you, sport.
I concur regards Craig also, a friend of mine who is that way inclined tells me the publication of choice pertaining to such matters is called 'Colt'. Maybe Craig will soon grace its cover and centre fold?
hahahaha, I'm glad i kept you all entertained
tertius said:
GregE240 said:
The cars performed amazingly well in spite of the heat, and I wasn't aware of any major overheating issues?
DeR's M5 might dispute this ... as my lowly 993 was denied a deciding run (honours even at 1-1) as it was "too hot"
Yes, that was all very odd: I think part of the problem with V-Max is that some very fast machinery is ruthlessly exposed so that whereas the old M5 might feel quick(ish) on the public highway, it is at Brunters a relative lard bucket, hence the results we observed.
Even so, it felt unbelievably asthmatic during our first tete a tete with speeds through the timing beams massively down on previous efforts.
In fact, to make sure it was just some kind of hyper evapourative effect and not some fatal, knackerative degeneration, I've just been for a tractionless (well, 20% tractionless
) blast and it seemed to haul quite well. But it'll never be in the 911 league...
derestrictor said:
tertius said:
GregE240 said:
The cars performed amazingly well in spite of the heat, and I wasn't aware of any major overheating issues?
DeR's M5 might dispute this ... as my lowly 993 was denied a deciding run (honours even at 1-1) as it was "too hot"
Yes, that was all very odd: I think part of the problem with V-Max is that some very fast machinery is ruthlessly exposed so that whereas the old M5 might feel quick(ish) on the public highway, it is at Brunters a relative lard bucket, hence the results we observed.
Even so, it felt unbelievably asthmatic during our first tete a tete with speeds through the timing beams massively down on previous efforts.
In fact, to make sure it was just some kind of hyper evapourative effect and not some fatal, knackerative degeneration, I've just been for a tractionless (well, 20% tractionless
) blast and it seemed to haul quite well. But it'll never be in the 911 league...
Glad to hear its nothing major.
There was certainly a big difference between the first and second runs. I really expected you to hurtle past on the straight (and not just because I had Martyn on board
). Now my turn to get the excuses in, I'm sure that making a total Horlicks of the bend was a lot of the reason I was humbled ... hence my desire for a decider ... next time. In fact, if I do get to come again I'll make more of an effort to run against similar machinery, instead of being demolished by cars like the RUF GT2 and Dave T's astonishing Audi S4 - that is quite a Q car. Would love to run against an NSX for example.
Should have said, would have been interesting
tertius said:
In fact, if I do get to come again I'll make more of an effort to run against similar machinery, instead of being demolished by cars like the RUF GT2 and Dave T's astonishing Audi S4 - that is quite a Q car. Would love to run against an NSX for example.
GregE240 said:
Award for Fingerprint Removal - Honda NSX - Trackdemon
Folks - let this serve as a warning - the skinny spare in the front of an NSX gets BLOODY hot. Good Samaritan moi decided to help poor old Steve out after his flat tyre, and jumped into getting the spare out and inflating it. What I only realised moments later is that the main radiator on these glorious machines is about 6" in front of the spare, so it gets rather a lot of indirect heat. Steve, I'm sure you could peel my fingerprints off and use them on a heist mate!
Sorry about that chap, but thanks very much for all your help with my issue!!! 
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