Murder in The Family - ITV1

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Alickadoo

Original Poster:

1,707 posts

23 months

Sunday 16th July 2023
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New series started.

Jealous husband murdered wife with a shotgun.

He then turned the gun on himself, but didn't make a very good job of it. He blew half his face away, can't speak, can't eat. Answers questions by pointing to letters on a card and spelling words.

Fascinating but horrible.

The murdered woman's daughter was incredibly composed for a 14/15 year old.

Kamov

226 posts

11 months

Sunday 16th July 2023
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Extremely disturbing viewing. Odd at first as on TIVO no info about what the programme was, half expected some Van der Valk sort of light murder intrigue.

Yes the young daughter was incredible as we do find out quit late on this was a 7 year relationship, that was effectively her 'Dad'.
I'm glad he didn't top himself, but i could of done without the mental images of the state of his face after he shot half of it off..... couldn't really sleep after watching it, so God knows how that girl has go over seeing her Mum shot.

Things I thought needed to be fleshed out though.
The relationship over 7 years, it goes from meeting to "he was controlling my mum", to her leaving, then we find out it was 7 years.
So was he good for like 6 years, or an utter knob for most of it?

He was an A typical country bloke, stuck up, farm (but one of mummy and daddy's), 4x4's, gun clubs, drink problem, massive debt but portraying wealth and power....

I recommend watching this, but beware how he tries and fails to kill himself, its grim even though they do pixelate the footage, if you are a visual person you'll piece it together and probably come up with a worse mental image...i know i did...

Awful waste of a life for the Mum, she seemed a lovely person who should of run a mile at the "I have a farm, i drive a land rover and i have a gun club and like to wear those tweed shirts that no one apart form farmer knows where to buy them"

Legacywr

12,139 posts

188 months

Monday 17th July 2023
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Good storey, but not half as well made as Ch4 do it.

The twist 3/4 of the way through though…

Alickadoo

Original Poster:

1,707 posts

23 months

Friday 21st July 2023
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Last night's episode.

Man sets fire to his mother-in-law and then himself. Both die.

Kamov

226 posts

11 months

Monday 24th July 2023
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Yes last nights was horrendous. Just like the other one horrible pointless waste of lives and how awful it is for kids, totally torn emotions for the young girl.
Loves her Dad, but her Dad killed her Grandma. How do you compute that?
The Police though, Jesus Christ, utter shambles.
The guy ultimately is responsible for his actions, of course, but he should of been stopped and I know this will sound very 2023, but helped with his mental breakdown he was mired in...

Just like the last one.... this is no way to die, and it will stick with you long after you have finished it.... although they don't show anything graphic this time thankfully.

Kamov

226 posts

11 months

Friday 28th July 2023
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FFS.
That was a tough watch...... again, like the other two, will stick with me for a few days at least.
Amazed this series hasn't had more people watching it, at least judging by how this thread has gone anyway.

Mcphisto

830 posts

135 months

Friday 28th July 2023
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Yup last night episode was heartbreaking, I think made more so by the amount of footage they had of the poor girls and their Dad cry

Kamov

226 posts

11 months

Friday 28th July 2023
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Indeed.
It's also where your imagination goes though. As a father of two I found myself drifting off into imagining how it all played out and how it even can happen.
I have had fair few troubles with mental health, well i have bi polar, so yeah thought about topping myself but never taking people with me let alone my kids.

In fact the kids are more likely to keep me alive as I don't want them to suffer from having their Dad topping himself as that is cruel. (I'm not saying parents topping themselves are cruel though, I know it doesn't work like that, you think people are better off without you etc etc).

Bloody hell, knew it would dig up some stuff..... good to watch things like this though.
Just so so sad for the little girls the mum her dad and sister..... awful.

I am curious why the show stayed well away from apportioning any role in the fact the government locked us all down because of a flu that was just killing old and infirm people though.

Seems we just aren't yet ready to address what the hell went on back then and the affects it had on people....

JackJarvis

2,236 posts

134 months

Friday 28th July 2023
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Is it a new series? I'm sure I watched it about 6 months ago. Maybe it was released online first.

I'm not usually affected by watching true crime stuff but it was particularly harrowing. You find yourself still thinking about it days later.

cerb4.5lee

30,687 posts

180 months

Friday 28th July 2023
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Kamov said:
FFS.
That was a tough watch...... again, like the other two, will stick with me for a few days at least.
Amazed this series hasn't had more people watching it, at least judging by how this thread has gone anyway.
I watched all 3 episodes last week on catch up after a recommend from a friend. I thought they were all brilliant(obviously incredibly sad too), and I wanted more episodes to be honest.

oobster

7,098 posts

211 months

Saturday 29th July 2023
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The one this week made me angry. Mental health is just awful but I can’t understand, and I don’t want to ever understand, why the selfish prick thought he’d take his two beautiful kids and his partner out the game.

If life is so st and nothing will stop you from ending it then don’t take others with you.

jules_s

4,287 posts

233 months

Saturday 29th July 2023
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oobster said:
The one this week made me angry. Mental health is just awful but I can’t understand, and I don’t want to ever understand, why the selfish prick thought he’d take his two beautiful kids and his partner out the game.

If life is so st and nothing will stop you from ending it then don’t take others with you.
I just get the impression that ep was poorly delivered

It seemed (evidenced) he was a massive coke head. They just seemed to ignore that because he didn't have any in his system



Kamov

226 posts

11 months

Wednesday 2nd August 2023
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oobster said:
The one this week made me angry. Mental health is just awful but I can’t understand, and I don’t want to ever understand, why the selfish prick thought he’d take his two beautiful kids and his partner out the game.

If life is so st and nothing will stop you from ending it then don’t take others with you.
To try to offer some sort of explanation, although even as someone with bi polar I could not ever rationalise my thoughts this way.
But here goes.
With suicide invariably and from experience, the thought process is ultimately "this will be better for everyone"
Basically you don't think how it will possibly destroy those around you, because you think being alive IS destroying those around you.
That is how I thought anyway.
So from this there is a distinct possibly that he didn't do this from a place of hate, but rather "the world is horrible i need to save my kids and wife from it also".

Look, its tough to try to rationalise it in anyway other than "nasty evil bd".
But its got a bit more nuance than that.

Thing is about irrational thinking is to the average outside person its not rational, but clearly to the person doing odd stuff, its totally rational.
So me, you 99.9 percent of people would rationally think its utterly demented and unfathomable behaviour, so its impossible to ever see it how he saw it.
But i can't for the life of me believe this crime came from a hateful place, no way does it make it any better, but there was a guy who jumped off a building with his 2 kids and he left a note which said largely this, he did it because he wanted to save his children, i guess save them from a mostly fictional threat he himself believed to be true....
Very very sad.

The other point I'd like to make regards something posted above is, thousands of people are coke addicts but didn't kill their kids and wife.
I had a phase of having the odd dabble of a night out and its st, horrible drug, but just saying "he was a coke addict" goes no way to explain it.

Same as how lazy journalist's say that Sinead O'Conner killed herself because her young child killed himself, well no she did it because she has bi polar, otherwise every person that lost someone would be killing themselves and no one will be left....
It was a trigger and no more.
I wanted to kill myself at one point because in the grip of a depression i was convinced that traffic lights were turning red to spite me and there was someone behind it all out to get me, now i wouldn't propose the problem there was traffic lights....



Edited by Kamov on Wednesday 2nd August 11:38


Edited by Kamov on Wednesday 2nd August 11:40