I just got me a new car...
Discussion
shnozz said:
in fairness mate, I have seen far worse. Its not too obvious that its been modified with that pipe and to lose all those bhps... but having said that I love the Sdi idea. Planned on doing something similar but just never found the time.
Might try covering the exhaust in black filth/paint to try and hide it first, whilst looking for a couple of diesel-styled tail-pipes. Might go for the following badge, too:
http://cgi.ebay.co.uk/ws/eBayISAPI.dll?ViewItem&category=21654&item=4513097710&rd=1&ssPageName=WDVW
minornut said:
Why not cut a short section of the fat end off and welding a small piece of standard diameter exhaust on the end but rigged so the the fumes breath around and through it like a spider arrangement.
I'd post a drawing but I don't know how
Know what you mean.
Will add that to the list of options. REALLY can't wait to catch some pseudo-"sports" car unawares...J_S_G said:
Why not cut a short section of the fat end off and welding a small piece of standard diameter exhaust on the end but rigged so the the fumes breath around and through it like a spider arrangement.
I'd post a drawing but I don't know how
Know what you mean.
scoobies are good fun - although they destroy me in the corners they are so surprised in a straight line. For sports cars, the low bhp TTs are left looking absolutely gutted
Chim_Girl said:
James - you just have to get a pipe, for the comedy value alone
flat hat too
have you guys seen my video for le mans 04? you can download it via my profile on PHTV. Flat cap & pipe. The only way to blast through France as a true englishman in an english sports car. short glimpse, but its on film
Right, picked the car up tonight... £1500 of the most amusing walnut trim come essex-boy pimping you ever did see. The story so far (I'm going to HAVE to keep a diary of this)...
I bought this car off EBay. Unseen. "Buy it now". I'd exchanged two e-mails with the guy before agreeing to buy it, nothing more. Grammar is merely a jumble of letters to the guy, not a word with semantic meaning. "Mate" is used as punctuation to every phrase. Turns out he's called Wayne. No, really - The V5 even says so. So, I meet him at Tamworth services to "do the deal"... it just wouldn't be fitting to buy such a vehicle anywhere more formal than a carpark by a Burger King, right?
First thing I do is ask him about turning the turbo pressure down - don't want the engine to self-detonate (which is a distinct possibility given how hard I push cars, and the fact it's currently running at a constant 16 PSI
). Whilst trying to show me, he catches the radiator, pulling off some hose & spraying boiling coolant everywhere. Next two hours (including the drive home) consist of windscreen wipers on intermittent all the way to wipe off all the spilt water still steaming from under the bonnet. Or is that the radiator that's blown? Who knows (who cares??)
He shows me a receipt for having the gearbox and clutch both replaced earlier in the week (as they were both ropey), which is nice, as they (along with the rather stressed engine) were my biggest worries. Funnily enough, that receipt's now vanished from the stack of bills and paperwork I've got for the car.
Even funnier, on the way home, I look down at the speedo & rev counter to see that the car's doing 4000 RPM in top at "80" mph. That doesn't feel quite right (understatement). Especially as the car (as standard) is rated to 6500 RPM, and 150 MPH. At that rate, redline would be 130mph. Definitely not right. So, Jo's following me in the Ka - I phone to let her know firstly that other than the bald tyres, spray all over the windscreen, lax-power exhaust rumble, odd revs, rickety seat, and embarrassing dump valve whoosh, it looks like we might make it back to Derby in one piece. That's assuming my eyes haven't started to bleed from the effects of the Magic Tree "mace" on the rear view mirror. (By this point, I'm wondering if he's put a Rover Metro gearbox in just to get the car out of line-of-sight, with the cash in his heavily tattooed hands). But no, turns out I'm actually cruising at close to the ton, and that the speedo's about as accurate as an official statement by the Right Hon. Mr. Blunkett. Makes me wonder about the speed cameras in the 30 zone I went through with a reading of "a little more than" 30 on the dials. F
ck.
Soooo..... 5 miles from home; the car's still in one piece (more than can be said for my dignity), and I've not taken it over a displayed 92 (turns out that's probably more like 110
). Had a bit of a play on the slip road onto the dual carriageway - first time I'd really opened it up. You wouldn't believe how much noise you can make by having a dustbin strapped to the back of your car. Or how quickly a half-leather armchair can move.... in a straight line, that is (this car's got about as much chance of being turned as Graham Norton - uprated suspension or not). Aaaaanyway, up pops a TT in my rear view mirror, wanting to overtake. REALLY wanting to overtake. 3rd gear at 75, anyone? The look on his girlfriend's face. That was worth £1500 alone. Not sure whether it was dismay at being beaten, or horror at what appears to be the channel tunnel where the exhaust should be on a Rover. Don't really care, either. Turns out it was a 225 when I let him past at the junction. Marvellous.
That's about it for the first hour of driving (piloting) it. Anybody know a cheap mechanic that can sort speedos? Or a dustbin man that can remove the appendage from the back of my car? Or anywhere that still sells Burberry chav-caps?
I'll get some better (and more amusing) photos over the next couple of days now it's Christmas hols, but here's my issue with the exhaust (it REALLY didn't look this bad on EBay, and it REALLY does look worse in real life):
Edited to add: Oh, and did I mention that he's fitted tasteful chrome washer jets, complete with compulsory blue "go-faster" neons? (Even the latest scientific techniques cannot measure such marginal fractions of a second as the length of time the wiring for THOSE lasted once the car was in my possession).
>> Edited by J_S_G on Thursday 23 December 00:50
I bought this car off EBay. Unseen. "Buy it now". I'd exchanged two e-mails with the guy before agreeing to buy it, nothing more. Grammar is merely a jumble of letters to the guy, not a word with semantic meaning. "Mate" is used as punctuation to every phrase. Turns out he's called Wayne. No, really - The V5 even says so. So, I meet him at Tamworth services to "do the deal"... it just wouldn't be fitting to buy such a vehicle anywhere more formal than a carpark by a Burger King, right?
First thing I do is ask him about turning the turbo pressure down - don't want the engine to self-detonate (which is a distinct possibility given how hard I push cars, and the fact it's currently running at a constant 16 PSI
). Whilst trying to show me, he catches the radiator, pulling off some hose & spraying boiling coolant everywhere. Next two hours (including the drive home) consist of windscreen wipers on intermittent all the way to wipe off all the spilt water still steaming from under the bonnet. Or is that the radiator that's blown? Who knows (who cares??) He shows me a receipt for having the gearbox and clutch both replaced earlier in the week (as they were both ropey), which is nice, as they (along with the rather stressed engine) were my biggest worries. Funnily enough, that receipt's now vanished from the stack of bills and paperwork I've got for the car.
Even funnier, on the way home, I look down at the speedo & rev counter to see that the car's doing 4000 RPM in top at "80" mph. That doesn't feel quite right (understatement). Especially as the car (as standard) is rated to 6500 RPM, and 150 MPH. At that rate, redline would be 130mph. Definitely not right. So, Jo's following me in the Ka - I phone to let her know firstly that other than the bald tyres, spray all over the windscreen, lax-power exhaust rumble, odd revs, rickety seat, and embarrassing dump valve whoosh, it looks like we might make it back to Derby in one piece. That's assuming my eyes haven't started to bleed from the effects of the Magic Tree "mace" on the rear view mirror. (By this point, I'm wondering if he's put a Rover Metro gearbox in just to get the car out of line-of-sight, with the cash in his heavily tattooed hands). But no, turns out I'm actually cruising at close to the ton, and that the speedo's about as accurate as an official statement by the Right Hon. Mr. Blunkett. Makes me wonder about the speed cameras in the 30 zone I went through with a reading of "a little more than" 30 on the dials. F
ck. Soooo..... 5 miles from home; the car's still in one piece (more than can be said for my dignity), and I've not taken it over a displayed 92 (turns out that's probably more like 110
). Had a bit of a play on the slip road onto the dual carriageway - first time I'd really opened it up. You wouldn't believe how much noise you can make by having a dustbin strapped to the back of your car. Or how quickly a half-leather armchair can move.... in a straight line, that is (this car's got about as much chance of being turned as Graham Norton - uprated suspension or not). Aaaaanyway, up pops a TT in my rear view mirror, wanting to overtake. REALLY wanting to overtake. 3rd gear at 75, anyone? The look on his girlfriend's face. That was worth £1500 alone. Not sure whether it was dismay at being beaten, or horror at what appears to be the channel tunnel where the exhaust should be on a Rover. Don't really care, either. Turns out it was a 225 when I let him past at the junction. Marvellous. That's about it for the first hour of driving (piloting) it. Anybody know a cheap mechanic that can sort speedos? Or a dustbin man that can remove the appendage from the back of my car? Or anywhere that still sells Burberry chav-caps?
I'll get some better (and more amusing) photos over the next couple of days now it's Christmas hols, but here's my issue with the exhaust (it REALLY didn't look this bad on EBay, and it REALLY does look worse in real life):
Edited to add: Oh, and did I mention that he's fitted tasteful chrome washer jets, complete with compulsory blue "go-faster" neons? (Even the latest scientific techniques cannot measure such marginal fractions of a second as the length of time the wiring for THOSE lasted once the car was in my possession).
>> Edited by J_S_G on Thursday 23 December 00:50
Chim_Girl said:
James - you just have to get a pipe, for the comedy value alone
flat hat too
If I can't get the exhaust sorted out & the dump valve taken off it soon then the flat-cap + pipe will be a baseball cap & spliff. It is SO embarrassing to be seen driving this at the moment.
that's yours!
J_S_G said:
... but here's my issue with the exhaust (it REALLY didn't look this bad on EBay, and it REALLY does look worse in real life):
Ascar in Sheffield specialise in putting things like this onto cars; I'd love to see the looks on their faces if you turned up and said 'just get this thing off my car'..
Psychobert said:
... but here's my issue with the exhaust (it REALLY didn't look this bad on EBay, and it REALLY does look worse in real life):
Ascar in Sheffield specialise in putting things like this onto cars; I'd love to see the looks on their faces if you turned up and said 'just get this thing off my car'..
Ascar have shut down'some of the lads who work for me are at a loss at the moment.
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