How to escape a Police Helicopter

[walm]

Dogwatch said:

fathomfive said:

Would lining your clothes with one or two of those thermal blankets not work sufficiently well to reduce your heat signature to an acceptably small level?

Possibly but most body heat is lost from the head . ->

Tin foil hat.
Job done.
Protection from both police helicopters and aliens.

[devonshiredave]

nobody mentioned underground yet?

sewer/drainage map of the area, tools, air, lights etc stashed down there already, hey presto youre free

[Benny Saltstein]

At night I heard the best place to hide would be a compost heap, the heat of which would mask the offending chavscum on the IR camera.

[shadowninja]

One of these?

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pVqHZ08uzbU&fea...

[Dirty Boy]

bob1179 said:

I still vote for the helicopter fitted with frickkin lasers.

Yer! Frikking lasers with sharks on!

[elster]

Just escape before helicopter gets there.

Couple of vehicle changes, off into sunset nice and calmly.

Not every helicopter chase is successful, if they were you could have a continuous stream of Police Camera Action on TV.

[john_p]

They can transit through Heathrow etc airspace, and the ATC will send jets around if they need to.. so if you were important enough you can't assume Heathrow will be safe haven.

Big sprawling shopping centre would be my bet. Drive like a tool the whole way there, so the traffic cars stay back for safety reasons.
Drive to the shopping centre or multistory car park, get in quick and dump the car.

At the same time have a friend waiting in a car/van with the ticket paid ready to go, hide in the back of the van and exit the car park preferably by another entrance. Dump the second car reasonably quickly (they'll have the CCTV). Then flee to Cyprus by boat.

[randomman]

OJ said:

Wasn't there a pair of chavs who succeeded by driving into a lake on a cold night and swimming to the other side?

If their body temp dropped to the same as a cold lake they would be very very dead.

Would be far better to swim gently through 37.5 degree C water

[miguel38]

Mc Lovin said:

make a run for some woods, where you have pre planted a large pane of glass with sucker handles attached, lift said pane over your head, et voila. No heat signature from above.

How would that work?

[chunkymonkey71]

Surface to air missile?

[Dirty Boy]

chunkymonkey71 said:

Surface to air missile?

Local corner shop sell those huh?

[chunkymonkey71]

Dirty Boy said:

chunkymonkey71 said:

Surface to air missile?

Local corner shop sell those huh?

Yep. Welcome to Glasgow!

[drivin_me_nuts]

Cleverly disguise yourself as Gordon Brown. Develop that hugely annoying way of breathing (well just breathing actually). Infiltrate the BBC. Get shown on News24.

Show a shocking video of some lovies standing around looking all sincere and desperate whilst the people of Englandistan suffer under a shocking opressive regime.

Pretend that for the next 20 minutes everyone in the country has to send just 50p to a specfied account of the country will be sold to a French/Argie/Ahrab/Amerikhan conglomorate fronted by Francois-Diego-BushLaden.

(Now I know this will work. After sitting on a bus earlier this week and listening to some dimwit 18 year old blathering into her mobile phone saying stuff like 'I never knew they spoke French in Congo, I thought she was bulstting me... I thought all them Africans spoke Akrikans or sumfink'

I realise how gullable some people are.

Perfect crime. No one gets shot, it's for a good cause and most importantly GB gets the blame, which as everyone knows, is the most important thing of all.

[wolves_wanderer]

TEKNOPUG said:

Crusoe said:

their top speed in ideal conditions is around 140mph, less if there is a head wind, and at top speed they don't last long on fuel. If you got on a fast motorway and had a car capable of 200mph or so you could out run one quite easily i'd imagine.

Edited by Crusoe on Friday 21st November 09:30

And how will the fuel last in a car capable of 200mph? Particulalry relevant as the chopper justhas to maintain visual contact with you and can therfore travel a much shorter distance in a straight line. I don't think that you've thought this through properly? Even 15mins at 200mph will take you 50miles - you know or a 50mile straight piece fo road that you can travel 200mph for 15mins without crashing? I suppose you could head to the Millbrook bowl.....but then the chopper could just hover in the middle.....

Plus they'd probably ring ahead to the next county's police chopper and have it waiting for you. Bearing in mind that the type of helicopters they use can do around 160mph in a straight line you would have to go pretty bloody quickly to get out of the way. Also you wouldn't believe how obvious a car doing that kind of speed is on a motorway. You will stick out like a honeymooner's nob.

[1602 driver]

john_p said:

They can transit through Heathrow etc airspace, and the ATC will send jets around if they need to.. so if you were important enough you can't assume Heathrow will be safe haven.

Big sprawling shopping centre would be my bet. Drive like a tool the whole way there, so the traffic cars stay back for safety reasons.
Drive to the shopping centre or multistory car park, get in quick and dump the car.

At the same time have a friend waiting in a car/van with the ticket paid ready to go, hide in the back of the van and exit the car park preferably by another entrance. Dump the second car reasonably quickly (they'll have the CCTV). Then flee to Cyprus by boat.

my idea exactly, or an easier way phone the cops and tell them there are armed men in a house and some of them have been seen putting guns in a car, and are driving away, you tell the police its an address the other side of the county, gives you plenty of time and less police cars in your area to chase you, and if they are on you, then you have someone on your side with a stinger and lead the cops to it and use it on them instead.

Edited by 1602 driver on Friday 21st November 10:33

[Fittster]

Aren't helicopter vulnerable to small arms fire? Just shoot it out of the sky.

[fullbeem]

Gone In 60 Seconds shows that a Go Baby Go button on the shifter will outrun any helecopter.

When the met show off the new Police enforcement Apache or Mi24 Hind then we will take note.

Edited by fullbeem on Friday 21st November 10:34

[MK4 Slowride]

If your into chases etc and want to do it for real but not get in trouble join the Police.

If your trying to get away then your going to have to hope the chopper runs out of fuel which at normal sppeds is probably about 6 hours worth?

[wolves_wanderer]

Fittster said:

Aren't helicopter vulnerable to small arms fire? Just shoot it out of the sky.

From the back of a fleeing car you couldn't hit a cow's arse with a banjo

[wolves_wanderer]

1602 driver said:

if they are on you, then you have someone on your side with a stinger and lead the cops to it and use it on them instead.

Edited by 1602 driver on Friday 21st November 10:33

Nice