The Great Breakfast photo thread (Vol. 2)

[Bacon Is Proof]

Please find an image of Jesus in the chorizo, please.

[bolidemichael]

Bacon Is Proof said:

Please find an image of Jesus in the chorizo, please.

Or Cheesus.

[Short Grain]

bolidemichael said:

Bacon Is Proof said:

Cotty said:

Bacon Is Proof said:

And FFS, don't ever use a ring. It's like trying to emulate Michelangelo using fking Play-Doh.

you use a ring if you are serving the egg in a roll or muffin. It gives you a thicker egg that fits properly. If you put a regular fried egg in a muffin half of it would be hanging out the sides.

Rolls come in all sizes, plenty are egg sized. Muffins can do one. If I ever wake up fancying a McDonald's I'll pick up my cast iron stove and exit the wrong side of my boat.
A fried egg forms the naturally perfect thickness of failed meat to be diluted sufficiently by your bacon such that you can be rewarded with the delicious yolk. No-one in their right mind would want to forcibly concentrate the white bit; that's just wrong. Not to mention the inevitability of over cooking the yolk when the white is that thick.
Please don't take this post too seriously, or grass me up to Pothole.
xxx

It's at times that this that I wish I possessed the witty one-liners of Speckled Jim.

Am I missing a new culinary term thought up by militant vegans, or is that a speeling error / predictive cook up?

Edited by Short Grain on Monday 15th March 18:37

[dumfriesdave]

anonymous said:

[redacted]

Give the egg a shake for a few seconds before cracking into the pan.
Providing the eggs are fresh the yolk should be almost central.

[bolidemichael]

anonymous said:

[redacted]

This is a falsehood whose believability lies in its outrageous shamefacedness, therefore I am going to give it a try.

[Murph7355]

CharlesdeGaulle said:

amusingduck said:

Chorizo Eggs this morning, plated from the top rope



Extra picante =

I really don't know what to make of that. I like chorizo, I like eggs and I like toast, but somehow that looks less than the sum of its parts.

Maybe there isn't enough egg; is it the ratios that are out?

It's the greenery.

Is that really a basil leaf?

(I'd drop the toast personally being on low carb these days...but I will need to get some chorizo in again this week. Made Shakshuka eggs the other week with veggie chorizo (other half is veggie) and they were lovely...

[craigjm]

I don’t do FEB much at all these days but these packs were on reduced buy me now at Sainsbury’s last night for 30p but FYI don’t bother I’m not sure it was even worth 30p

https://thescottishbutcher.com/product/mini-breakf...

No idea what the full price is. Plating was a disaster and the Mrs who was in charge of the eggs used the duck eggs and put them in a bloody poach mould



I’ll get my coat.....

[Bacon Is Proof]

craigjm said:

I’ll get my coat.....

Don't worry, Sammo123 lowered the bar so much you'd struggle to push that plate under it.

[UTH]

craigjm said:

I don’t do FEB much at all these days but these packs were on reduced buy me now at Sainsbury’s last night for 30p but FYI don’t bother I’m not sure it was even worth 30p

https://thescottishbutcher.com/product/mini-breakf...

No idea what the full price is. Plating was a disaster and the Mrs who was in charge of the eggs used the duck eggs and put them in a bloody poach mould



I’ll get my coat.....

I can feel how cold that toast is just by looking at the butter. Brrrrrrrrrr.

[C70R]

UTH said:

craigjm said:

I don’t do FEB much at all these days but these packs were on reduced buy me now at Sainsbury’s last night for 30p but FYI don’t bother I’m not sure it was even worth 30p

https://thescottishbutcher.com/product/mini-breakf...

No idea what the full price is. Plating was a disaster and the Mrs who was in charge of the eggs used the duck eggs and put them in a bloody poach mould



I’ll get my coat.....

I can feel how cold that toast is just by looking at the butter. Brrrrrrrrrr.

Definitely margarine, and it appears to have been spread with the back of a teaspoon.

[craigjm]

C70R said:

UTH said:

craigjm said:

I don’t do FEB much at all these days but these packs were on reduced buy me now at Sainsbury’s last night for 30p but FYI don’t bother I’m not sure it was even worth 30p

https://thescottishbutcher.com/product/mini-breakf...

No idea what the full price is. Plating was a disaster and the Mrs who was in charge of the eggs used the duck eggs and put them in a bloody poach mould



I’ll get my coat.....

I can feel how cold that toast is just by looking at the butter. Brrrrrrrrrr.

Definitely margarine, and it appears to have been spread with the back of a teaspoon.

Its "spreadable butter" I seem to have an issue with my toaster at the moment it browns perfectly well but the toast isnt actually hot. I will be speaking to Kitchen Aid as only 9 months old

[CharlesdeGaulle]

C70R said:

UTH said:

craigjm said:

I don’t do FEB much at all these days but these packs were on reduced buy me now at Sainsbury’s last night for 30p but FYI don’t bother I’m not sure it was even worth 30p

https://thescottishbutcher.com/product/mini-breakf...

No idea what the full price is. Plating was a disaster and the Mrs who was in charge of the eggs used the duck eggs and put them in a bloody poach mould



I’ll get my coat.....

I can feel how cold that toast is just by looking at the butter. Brrrrrrrrrr.

Definitely margarine, and it appears to have been spread with the back of a teaspoon.

Yeah, no way is that proper butter. It might be 'spreadable' butter rather than marge, but that isn't 'proper' despite what the butter-dish-haters will try and tell you. Savages.

[seyre1972]

craigjm said:

I don’t do FEB much at all these days but these packs were on reduced buy me now at Sainsbury’s last night for 30p but FYI don’t bother I’m not sure it was even worth 30p

https://thescottishbutcher.com/product/mini-breakf...

No idea what the full price is. Plating was a disaster and the Mrs who was in charge of the eggs used the duck eggs and put them in a bloody poach mould



I’ll get my coat.....

Craigjm - and you had the temerity to pull me up on the Dirty takeaway thread as below ..... it looks like you had all the components needed for a decent FEB, and then failed to deliver and then tried to blame the missus ..... now that's low

craigjm said:

Did you miss the curry off the list or did you st on your plate?

[Bonefish Blues]

I'm more concerned about the Kitchen Aid toaster revelation. Ideas above ones culinary station, one might suggest

[Bacon Is Proof]

craigjm said:

Its "spreadable butter" I seem to have an issue with my toaster at the moment it browns perfectly well but the toast isnt actually hot. I will be speaking to Kitchen Aid as only 9 months old

Throw your toaster in a skip, get a gas range and grill. Perfect toast every time.
At the risk of repeating myself, butter is spreadable, just don't keep it in the fridge like some sort of wanton pervert.

[Bacon Is Proof]

craigjm said:

it browns perfectly well

Burns.
It burns perfectly well.
Subtle but important difference.

[craigjm]

Bonefish Blues said:

I'm more concerned about the Kitchen Aid toaster revelation. Ideas above ones culinary station, one might suggest

It’s not a fooking toaster if it colours the bread but doesn’t warm it! It’s just started doing that I’m gonna send it back

[craigjm]

seyre1972 said:

Haha I didn’t pull you up just noticed the item wasn’t in your list. Chinese curry is my favourite from a. Chinese take out

[Bonefish Blues]

craigjm said:

Bonefish Blues said:

I'm more concerned about the Kitchen Aid toaster revelation. Ideas above ones culinary station, one might suggest

It’s not a fooking toaster if it colours the bread but doesn’t warm it! It’s just started doing that I’m gonna send it back

Did you perhaps buy the Kitchen Aid bread spray booth in error?

[craigjm]

Bonefish Blues said:

craigjm said:

Bonefish Blues said:

I'm more concerned about the Kitchen Aid toaster revelation. Ideas above ones culinary station, one might suggest

It’s not a fooking toaster if it colours the bread but doesn’t warm it! It’s just started doing that I’m gonna send it back

Did you perhaps buy the Kitchen Aid bread spray booth in error?

I don’t think it will catch on