Stupidest Cooking Mistake

[Cotty]

I mum used to make pies and freeze them without lables. So one sunday we had potatoes, veg and gravey at the ready but when she cut into it, it was an apple pie.

[marctwo]

markoc said:

Had a "brain out" moment and decided to see what would happen if I cracked an egg directly into the deep fat frier. Not going to do that again.

Also, in another deep fat fryer episode, a mate threw some pasta in to see what would happen (why we didn't work this one out I don't know). Again, plenty of mess, and pasta that came out harder than adamantium.

Suffice to say both were during my uni days.

So what happened????

[juice]

Made a big pot of curry one Saturday afternoon, left it to simmer. Then went out for the evening leaving the pot on the hob for about 5 hours until we got back...
Walked in and found that the curry had boiled itself dry then welded itself to the bottom of the pan, the house was more humid than a Borneo rainforest and it took weeks to get the smell of curry out the house.

What a nob

[VR6time]

Cotty said:

I mum used to make pies and freeze them without lables. So one sunday we had potatoes, veg and gravey at the ready but when she cut into it, it was an apple pie.

Freezer surprise was a once or twice yearly event when we were growing up.

Was a great excuse for a take away.

[CraigW]

rental cottage....

put massive roast chicken on, go our for an hour walk with kids,

come back.

OH F**K whats all the smoke???????.. oh that'd be the grill I've used not the fan oven setting. oops!

the top was nice n crispy though!!

Edited by CraigW on Monday 2nd November 15:45

[markoc]

marctwo said:

markoc said:

Had a "brain out" moment and decided to see what would happen if I cracked an egg directly into the deep fat frier. Not going to do that again.

Also, in another deep fat fryer episode, a mate threw some pasta in to see what would happen (why we didn't work this one out I don't know). Again, plenty of mess, and pasta that came out harder than adamantium.

Suffice to say both were during my uni days.

So what happened????

On impact with the oil the egg pretty much exploded in a fury of spitting fat, not helped by the fact that as it descended through the hot oil it passed through the mesh basket - splitting up into even smaller bits of volatile frying egg. Our kitchen never recovered from this onslaught - for the rest of that year we were finding random splodges of oil and egg around the kitchen. I suspect to this day (nearly ten years on) it has never been returned to its previously clean state

[andy43]

Not me, the wife.. her first attempt at cooking a supermarket pizza years ago.
Preheat oven, pizza in on baking tray, horrible smell of burning soon after.. "...well I thought I'd leave the polystyrene base on to keep the baking tray clean..."
Pizza, tray, bin, takeaway. At least she took the clingfilm off.

[captainzep]

6th form common room. 1993.

Staring at kettle. Pondering time saving ways of making beverages for all.

Water?

Instant coffee?

Splash of milk?

All added to the kettle before throwing the switch. -A jug of hot white coffee should be the outcome, no?




No.

[smack]

A long time ago: Come home from the pub, quite drunk, and the housemate had cooked a beef goulash earlier, and had left some for me. I turned on the hob to reheat the leftovers in the pot.... And fell asleep. Woke up 2 hours later to find it had boiled dry. Bugger.

One time I spend 3 hours cooking a stew, everyone is starving, and I dropped the casserole dish when I slipped on water on the floor, spreading dinner all over the place, and putting a nice dent in the floor with the cast iron pot. So we went to the pub.

[pugwash4x4]

anonymous said:

[redacted]

you may like to consider rewriting that line- it sounds...................................well you'll work it out!

[sherman]

Last night my mum served up the sunday roast with potatoes that tasted flowery. She had not rinsed the still wet serving spoon after washing it in flowery type fairy liquid and so the first couple of potatoes on everyones plates were an odd flavor to say the least.

[sleep envy]

was that during the trip?

mistaking a table spoon for a tea spoon and ending up with incredibly sweet onion soup

[Lefty Two Drams]

captainzep said:

6th form common room. 1993.

Staring at kettle. Pondering time saving ways of making beverages for all.

Water?

Instant coffee?

Splash of milk?

All added to the kettle before throwing the switch. -A jug of hot white coffee should be the outcome, no?




No.

Ah, I've contemplated that in the past. What happened?

[captainzep]

thegavster said:

Lefty Two Drams said:

captainzep said:

6th form common room. 1993.

Staring at kettle. Pondering time saving ways of making beverages for all.

Water?

Instant coffee?

Splash of milk?

All added to the kettle before throwing the switch. -A jug of hot white coffee should be the outcome, no?




No.

Ah, I've contemplated that in the past. What happened?

I'm guessing it would boil over.

The very hot element gets all sorts of 'gack' welded to it and various milk solids and instant coffee granule constituent parts start floating around. Bits of grey rubbery 'gack' gradually peel off the element over the next year or so, reminding you of your error of judgement.

[bazking69]

Not me, but the wife once emptied a jar of passata into mince and onions to make a spag bol, and then for some reason filled the jar up with water, shook it, and put that into the wok as well.

Two hours later it was still like a soup...

[Smokey bob]

bazking69 said:

Not me, but the wife once emptied a jar of passata into mince and onions to make a spag bol, and then for some reason filled the jar up with water, shook it, and put that into the wok as well.

Two hours later it was still like a soup...

My mum does that, nearly everytime

[CommanderJameson]

I was young. I didn't understand things.

I loved creamy, delicious mayonnaise. Still do, to be honest.

I also loved delicious, creamy curry. So obviously, if you're making a curry, adding mayonnaise instead of cream will just add new dimensions of creaminess, right?

Wrong.

[AndyAudi]

markoc said:

...for the rest of that year we were finding random splodges of oil and egg around the kitchen.

But I'll bet it wasn't as bad as letting an un-opened can of condensed milk boil dry in a pan!

My Grandmother required help to clean the toffee stuff from the roof & walls etc and it appeared on your fingers when you pulled out a kitchen chair for a long while after.

[thatone1967]

my ex brother in law put a pizza under the grill and turned it over halfway through cooking....

[Robwhite]

my ex brother in law put a pizza under the grill and turned it over halfway through cooking.... That's absolutely priceless!!! Doesn't that just sum up blokey cooking.
Nearly as good as my sister in law some years ago when we had "boil in the bag" fish and sauce - she opened the bags and emptied them in the boiling water