8.2 Milion living alone

[aeropilot]

techiedave said:

I think that all these people living alone are somewhat selfish.
I think it's about time that for the wider good real positive (if initially disruptive) action was taken.
It needs a political party to bring in a policy that can affect both the loneliness of living alone and as importantly the homeless crisis.
People living alone in a property that can support more than one should have to give up space to the new initiative. Larger houses can be partitioned off.

Obviously the programme would have to match the existing occupant with the type of person moving in. No one wants to put people together that blatantly can't get on. People would need to be incentivized to take part. A system similar to the one that was at one point used with council tenants would work.
Basically the original occupant will be presented with 3 prospective co inhabitants (or families)
they may refuse the first 2 but if they do not accept the 3rd then perhaps they should forfeit their right to live in their own premises.
I realise this may sound radical some will even accuse it of having a "big brother" type approach. I however believe it will cure the issues of loneliness and help the housing crisis.

Foxtrot Oscar with that idea..........


However, many older people don't have the ability to see the wood for the trees and stay put in too big a property for too long, often out of memory of a wife/husband since departed, and then they struggle to maintain and look after the place, and still can't see the wood for the trees.
My late mother was just such an example.
On the other hand my remaining aunt & uncle have looked ahead and downsized into a lovely retirement complex with all sorts of social functions put on and a lovely community feel to it. They both realize that there time together is drawing to an end and when one of them goes first the other will already have an established network in place to help them through and move forward alone.

[Pan Pan Pan]

g3org3y said:

Pan Pan Pan said:

I certainly don't, but lets face it I doubt that many do, Fortunately with great age, ones horizons are fairly likely to reduce down to little more than when the next meal turns up, and getting to a toilet before sh*tting oneself.
Fortunately we all die alone, whether or not we are surrounded by thousands of people who love us to bits, or sitting on our own, in a bedsit., Makes no difference at all how many people are around us when it happens.

I disagree. Family care and support is paramount when it come to good palliative care. It can be the difference between dying peacefully and pain free in your own bed at home or in A&E full of needles with an enthusiastic junior doctor doing CPR breaking your ribs.

You have cited an extreme case to support your point of view. One could just as easily die peacefully, and pain free in ones own bed, when alone, as you could when surrounded by people.
In fact the chance of dying painfully in hospital, pumped full of drugs, with broken ribs from CPR, and feeling like a pin cushion is increased when people around you try to extend your (possibly painful) existence by getting you into a hospital that `you' don't want to go to, in an attempt to extend your life beyond its allotted span, and this would be just as, if not more likely when there are people around you when you approach your last moments.
If I had not said and done all the things I wanted to, and for those I love, by the time I pop my clogs, That would be a failing on my part and no one else`s.
Whether people like to accept it or not, when a person is dying, they are dying and moving on, whilst everyone else around them is staying (for a while longer at least)
What difference does it make to the person who is dying, if they have thousands, or no one around them, when they pass on? They are still dying whilst everyone else is staying.
Would it make the dying person feel better to know that (like in ancient Egypt) everyone around them, including all their loved ones and admirers, are required to follow them into the grave? No it would not, in fact It would make me feel worse if I knew that my passing, would in some way guarantee pain of some sort would be inflicted on those I love, or like.
The ones who really suffer the most, are all those who are left behind, until of course it is `their' turn to go..
When you are dead, you don't get hungry. cold, sad, happy, ill, over taxed, bored, broke, rich, homeless, angry, in pain, ridiculously healthy, sad, etc, etc, because you are dead. All those are facets of being alive (and more) and are exclusively the lot of all those left alive, behind, definitely nothing to do with you, once you or anyone has passed on..

Edited by Pan Pan Pan on Wednesday 20th November 10:54

Edited by Pan Pan Pan on Wednesday 20th November 11:12

[Cotty]

techiedave said:

I think that all these people living alone are somewhat selfish.
I think it's about time that for the wider good real positive (if initially disruptive) action was taken.
It needs a political party to bring in a policy that can affect both the loneliness of living alone and as importantly the homeless crisis.
People living alone in a property that can support more than one should have to give up space to the new initiative. Larger houses can be partitioned off.

I think the problem of over population would be solved as the murder rate went up. I have a spade and a bag of lime and I am not afraid to use them

[bloomen]

Humble Pi said:

I am exactly the same.

I've learnt a few harsh lessons with regards to women, mainly that most of them are not to be trusted. As much as I'd love to meet a nice one, but they're few and far between this day & age I fear.

It always makes me chuckle when someone proposes turning gay as if that would make the slightest difference in the amount of misery someone would inflict on you.

At least having kids is a teensy bit harder I suppose.

[Cotty]

bloomen said:

It always makes me chuckle when someone proposes turning gay as if that would make the slightest difference in the amount of misery someone would inflict on you.

.

Who said anything about turning gay?

[Touring442]

JuniorD said:

Touring442 said:

Dont like rolls said:

croyde said:

Touring442 said:

I went on holiday last year for a fortnight and ended up shagging pretty much every night so I know I'm not too repulsive.

Please tell me where you went on holiday, so I can book next year. Ta

I would ask which antibiotics and cream to take as well if I was you....

Don't forget the value pack of johnnies and a few blueys as well.

"Pretty much every night".

How many is "pretty much"? Surely you know exactly how many nights you were/weren't shagging on your 14 day holiday?

Was it a different guy each night, or the same one?

Same one Darling.

Why, are you jealous? Inbox me Hun XXXXX

[bloomen]

Cotty said:

Who said anything about turning gay?

Cos it's people who are 'orrible plenty of the time regardless of gender.

[Nickgnome]

Humble Pi said:

anarki said:

I have no interest in meeting another woman (for a relationship) and my sex drive has diminished to the point where its practically non-existent.

Was previously in a 7 year relationship. Things went catastrophically wrong and I will not put myself in that position again, for anyone. I will be the first to admit that I could've managed my actions better in that relationship and walked away, way before things got to breaking point, but I didn't and cannot change the past. I have accepted this and moved on. Moving on for me means learning a lesson. I have learnt a vital lesson early on in my life.

I am exactly the same.

I've learnt a few harsh lessons with regards to women, mainly that most of them are not to be trusted. As much as I'd love to meet a nice one, but they're few and far between this day & age I fear.

I think your view of women may have been tarnished by the situation you have been In. Are you sure that you have had absolutely no responsibility for the situation?


I don’t generally think pubs or clubs are necessarily a good place to meet a potential partner.

Ensuring your social circle is broad enough to meet and socialise with various women, not necessarily dating.

Having passionate interests outside the career can open up relationship possibilities.

I’ve met very few women that I consider to be untrustworthy, perhaps I’ve been lucky.

[g3org3y]

Pan Pan Pan said:

g3org3y said:

Pan Pan Pan said:

I certainly don't, but lets face it I doubt that many do, Fortunately with great age, ones horizons are fairly likely to reduce down to little more than when the next meal turns up, and getting to a toilet before sh*tting oneself.
Fortunately we all die alone, whether or not we are surrounded by thousands of people who love us to bits, or sitting on our own, in a bedsit., Makes no difference at all how many people are around us when it happens.

I disagree. Family care and support is paramount when it come to good palliative care. It can be the difference between dying peacefully and pain free in your own bed at home or in A&E full of needles with an enthusiastic junior doctor doing CPR breaking your ribs.

You have cited an extreme case to support your point of view. One could just as easily die peacefully, and pain free in ones own bed, when alone, as you could when surrounded by people.
In fact the chance of dying painfully in hospital, pumped full of drugs, with broken ribs from CPR, and feeling like a pin cushion is increased when people around you try to extend your (possibly painful) existence by getting you into a hospital that `you' don't want to go to, in an attempt to extend your life beyond its allotted span, and this would be just as, if not more likely when there are people around you when you approach your last moments.
If I had not said and done all the things I wanted to, and for those I love, by the time I pop my clogs, That would be a failing on my part and no one else`s.
Whether people like to accept it or not, when a person is dying, they are dying and moving on, whilst everyone else around them is staying (for a while longer at least)
What difference does it make to the person who is dying, if they have thousands, or no one around them, when they pass on? They are still dying whilst everyone else is staying.

Out of interest, what's your experience of elderly care or palliative care? With the greatest respect, you seem to have rather skewed (incorrect ime) views on this. It's a shame, but I think you're totally off base.

I'm a GP who works with a focus on palliative care, so I think I have a fair idea what I'm talking about. This includes both elderly individuals and also those unfortunate enough to have suffered a life limiting illness much earlier in life.

Familial support and early care planning is shown to minimise hospital admissions and improve outcomes in all aspects of palliative care.

[Nickgnome]

g3org3y said:

Out of interest, what's your experience of elderly care or palliative care? With the greatest respect, you seem to have rather skewed (incorrect ime) views on this. It's a shame, but I think you're totally off base.

I'm a GP who works with a focus on palliative care, so I think I have a fair idea what I'm talking about. This includes both elderly individuals and also those unfortunate enough to have suffered a life limiting illness much earlier in life.

Familial support and early care planning is shown to minimise hospital admissions and improve outcomes in all aspects of palliative care.

Thank you. Pan pan has a very skewed view.

My dad worked in welfare (social) services in elderly care. He always advocated families and or friends being around if that was possible. It was in the day of council run care, which from my limited knowledge seemed more caring then than it is now.

[wasswole]

I'm 32 and live alone, haven't had a friend or been in a relationship in 10+ years (half a life time of depression and occasional anxiety)

Guess I'm a stoic. I go to work each day and spend my hard earned money on rent and booze. I don't take holidays, don't see a point.

I sleep like a baby every night but admit there are occasions I get bitter and angry at my lot.

Good food, cheap wine and cars/motorsport keep me distracted.

[Pan Pan Pan]

Nickgnome said:

g3org3y said:

Out of interest, what's your experience of elderly care or palliative care? With the greatest respect, you seem to have rather skewed (incorrect ime) views on this. It's a shame, but I think you're totally off base.

I'm a GP who works with a focus on palliative care, so I think I have a fair idea what I'm talking about. This includes both elderly individuals and also those unfortunate enough to have suffered a life limiting illness much earlier in life.

Familial support and early care planning is shown to minimise hospital admissions and improve outcomes in all aspects of palliative care.

Thank you. Pan pan has a very skewed view.

My dad worked in welfare (social) services in elderly care. He always advocated families and or friends being around if that was possible. It was in the day of council run care, which from my limited knowledge seemed more caring then than it is now.

So any view that is different to yours is skewed? It is not, it is just different. I have had more years than I ever cared to, living with, and caring for elderly relatives. And that taught me, that when a person dies, it makes little difference to them whether they die with thousands who love them, or they die alone. They are passing on, and everyone else carries on, until it is their turn to pass on. It is those who remain who will feel sad, or damaged in some way. The dead feel nothing.
I do not like the implications from some, that those who choose to live alone are somehow wrong, or defective, compared to those in a relationship. Living with someone who one does not want to be with, or live with, (as many do, because they have been brainwashed (not least by the PBD) into thinking that they MUST be in a relationship of any kind, is far, far more toxic to life, than living alone. In fact for some, living alone for the first time in their lives, can feel like the purest form of freedom, they will ever experience.
It seems as though some (but fortunately not all) of those who are in a relationship, think that everyone else `ought' to be in the same boat as them, regardless of whether it is good, or bad for the individuals, and that any views contrary to theirs, seem to be regarded as `skewed' As stated above they are just different, and not to be sneered at, or denigrated as some here have seen fit to do.

[anonymous-user]

Pan Pan Pan said:

So any view that is different to yours is skewed? snip
o.

It's not every day you get to interact with some of the total geniuses on here. Embrace the experience is what I say

[Robertj21a]

Most people that I know are now single or divorced. They always seem far happier, and much more relaxed, than those who are married. I'm sure there's a lesson there.

[Whatsmyname]

I'm married with kids but if anything happened there is not a chance in hell I would ever live with anyone ever again.

[Pan Pan Pan]

Robertj21a said:

Most people that I know are now single or divorced. They always seem far happier, and much more relaxed, than those who are married. I'm sure there's a lesson there.

Then there is the old saying, that until a man is married, he is not complete, but once he is married, he is finished!

[hyphen]

Whatsmyname said:

I'm married with kids but if anything happened there is not a chance in hell I would ever live with anyone ever again.

Because no one could ever match up to the woman you are currently married to?

[scenario8]

Whatsmyname said:

I'm married with kids but if anything happened there is not a chance in hell I would ever live with anyone ever again.

This post tickled me so much I can’t help myself to quote it.

[Pan Pan Pan]

hyphen said:

Whatsmyname said:

I'm married with kids but if anything happened there is not a chance in hell I would ever live with anyone ever again.

Because no one could ever match up to the woman you are currently married to?

Indeed, she could be either outstandingly brilliant, or terminally nasty, both options might be a valid reason for not wanting to be married again.

[Nickgnome]

Robertj21a said:

Most people that I know are now single or divorced. They always seem far happier, and much more relaxed, than those who are married. I'm sure there's a lesson there.

Bit of an odd social set you have then. Not very balanced.

Surly most people’s social circles will be a mixture of singles, couples and families.