Locations to retire to and why?
Discussion
mikeiow said:
Since this is about exploring new areas to retire to…..
Genuine question to those who have “upped sticks” and moved somewhere (the countryside, the Algarve, etc): do you not miss old friends?
I understand that people will visit, but that is a far more planned task than a WhatsApp “anyone fancy a curry/beers/film tonight, or bike ride tomorrow ‘cos the weather looks decent”.
I also get that some people are more solitary, & I can see that making relocation far easier if that is you.
Maybe in a few years we will tire of our pals….but the thought of heading to a totally new area perhaps a hundred or more miles away and building up a network from scratch would fill me with mild horror right now.
Not retired but I do spend half my time abroad and also UK home is 250 miles from where I am from, so feel partly qualified to comment. Genuine question to those who have “upped sticks” and moved somewhere (the countryside, the Algarve, etc): do you not miss old friends?
I understand that people will visit, but that is a far more planned task than a WhatsApp “anyone fancy a curry/beers/film tonight, or bike ride tomorrow ‘cos the weather looks decent”.
I also get that some people are more solitary, & I can see that making relocation far easier if that is you.
Maybe in a few years we will tire of our pals….but the thought of heading to a totally new area perhaps a hundred or more miles away and building up a network from scratch would fill me with mild horror right now.
Occasionally miss old friends but many have themselves moved around both the country and further afield in different parts of the world. You make new friends. You make an effort with some old friends. Some friends become infrequent and others drop away. Modern technology is great for catching up with people from afar. Living someone sunny also means you will see a regular influx of visitors!!!
It was interesting over lockdown and going entirely "virtual" for drinks/quizzes/birthdays etc. It was nice to incorporate a group of old mates from all over the place from parts of the UK to us in Spain, other couple in Austria etc. Made you realise what was possible but sadly disbanded after the restrictions ended.
In short, had I remained where I was from originally most of my friends moved on themselves over the years. In fact when I visit, there are only a few that remain to catch up with. I am far from solitary but have simply expanded my friendship circle in my view.
I’m a way off retirement, but on the subject of friendships; I’ve moved to Australia, the US and Hong Kong. I grew up in Yorkshire.
Close friends remain close, you make more friends by moving and creating new circles of friends. Some have turned out to be close, lifelong ones. It’s a lovely part of moving somewhere new.
Leaving is always a bit sad, of course - as is watching friends go off to fresh pastures. But (and maybe I’m particularly good at making friends, but I don’t think so) I definitely wouldn’t let the leaving friends aspect have an overriding influence, unless you doubt your ability to make new ones.
Close friends remain close, you make more friends by moving and creating new circles of friends. Some have turned out to be close, lifelong ones. It’s a lovely part of moving somewhere new.
Leaving is always a bit sad, of course - as is watching friends go off to fresh pastures. But (and maybe I’m particularly good at making friends, but I don’t think so) I definitely wouldn’t let the leaving friends aspect have an overriding influence, unless you doubt your ability to make new ones.
Royal Jelly said:
I’m a way off retirement, but on the subject of friendships; I’ve moved to Australia, the US and Hong Kong. I grew up in Yorkshire.
Close friends remain close, you make more friends by moving and creating new circles of friends. Some have turned out to be close, lifelong ones. It’s a lovely part of moving somewhere new.
Leaving is always a bit sad, of course - as is watching friends go off to fresh pastures. But (and maybe I’m particularly good at making friends, but I don’t think so) I definitely wouldn’t let the leaving friends aspect have an overriding influence, unless you doubt your ability to make new ones.
Your last point just reinforces my view of 'not leaving it too late'.Close friends remain close, you make more friends by moving and creating new circles of friends. Some have turned out to be close, lifelong ones. It’s a lovely part of moving somewhere new.
Leaving is always a bit sad, of course - as is watching friends go off to fresh pastures. But (and maybe I’m particularly good at making friends, but I don’t think so) I definitely wouldn’t let the leaving friends aspect have an overriding influence, unless you doubt your ability to make new ones.
My grandfather wanted to retire down to the coast from west London pretty much as soon as he retired. Gran wasn't interested as she didn't want to miss her friends.
By the time they did move down, neither were in a 'condition' to really socialise and rebuild friendships. That was very rough.
Sway said:
Your last point just reinforces my view of 'not leaving it too late'.
My grandfather wanted to retire down to the coast from west London pretty much as soon as he retired. Gran wasn't interested as she didn't want to miss her friends.
By the time they did move down, neither were in a 'condition' to really socialise and rebuild friendships. That was very rough.
That’s a very valid one - you do need to get there while the going is still good..My grandfather wanted to retire down to the coast from west London pretty much as soon as he retired. Gran wasn't interested as she didn't want to miss her friends.
By the time they did move down, neither were in a 'condition' to really socialise and rebuild friendships. That was very rough.
Royal Jelly said:
That’s a very valid one - you do need to get there while the going is still good..
Totally agree with this . We’ll be around an hour from where we are now so I don’t see that as being a massive upheaval.
What I don’t want to do is find myself incapable of enjoying the new facilities exercise wise around me
Royal Jelly said:
Sway said:
Your last point just reinforces my view of 'not leaving it too late'.
My grandfather wanted to retire down to the coast from west London pretty much as soon as he retired. Gran wasn't interested as she didn't want to miss her friends.
By the time they did move down, neither were in a 'condition' to really socialise and rebuild friendships. That was very rough.
That’s a very valid one - you do need to get there while the going is still good..My grandfather wanted to retire down to the coast from west London pretty much as soon as he retired. Gran wasn't interested as she didn't want to miss her friends.
By the time they did move down, neither were in a 'condition' to really socialise and rebuild friendships. That was very rough.
They live just outside Grimsby (or 'North Lincolnshire' as they insist on saying, being somewhat Hyacinth Bouquet).
Two daughters live in Bedford (sorry: Biddenham Village
) and Dorset.FiL is very keen to move south to be near us, MiL is being phenomenally stubborn, and finding fault with every potential house.
The experience of watching me regularly drive an hour to sort my elderly father (then my late father's estate) has concentrated her mind a bit, but she has voiced the idea that it's now "too late" to move....
Shnozz said:
Siko said:
My folks have done the opposite in retirement and love it - tiny village to big town....they walk everywhere and love going out for coffees/meals etc without too much hassle.
My in-laws have done this, as have the parents of a good friend. Both downsized from a detached house with gardens to maintain, stairs etc. Bought apartments in cities and loving having cinemas, shops, cafes and restaurants on their doorstep. When I heard initially I thought a strange decision, but now its played out for a few years I can understand the attraction. Years of living rurally enjoying the house, garden and raising a family. Now an easy maintenance flat where they can be selfish with their time and also lock up and leave so they can travel. Personally I love both the city and rural, albeit when I say "rural" my limit would be a small town. I couldn't live in the arse end of nowhere.
Plus there are so many things to do on foot/tube/train. If I want to see some countryside it's easy enough. A quick walk in the Chilterns does me for a few months.
I grew up in a small commuter town and found it very dull. I briefly lived and worked in a very rural location and the boredom was immense.
Metropolitan retirement is very attractive to me.
Each to their own and all that.
mikeiow said:
Since this is about exploring new areas to retire to…..
Genuine question to those who have “upped sticks” and moved somewhere (the countryside, the Algarve, etc): do you not miss old friends?
I understand that people will visit, but that is a far more planned task than a WhatsApp “anyone fancy a curry/beers/film tonight, or bike ride tomorrow ‘cos the weather looks decent”.
I also get that some people are more solitary, & I can see that making relocation far easier if that is you.
Maybe in a few years we will tire of our pals….but the thought of heading to a totally new area perhaps a hundred or more miles away and building up a network from scratch would fill me with mild horror right now.
Proper friends stay in touch, come visit/stay. Acquaintances come and go, no massive loss. You just make new friends. Once you have moved you need to get out and do things in the local community. Even properly out in the country there are still lots of things to do - clubs, groups, sports etc. Out of necessity people create these things but you do need to want to take part (though you can get by being a hermit if you wish - just don't moan about it).Genuine question to those who have “upped sticks” and moved somewhere (the countryside, the Algarve, etc): do you not miss old friends?
I understand that people will visit, but that is a far more planned task than a WhatsApp “anyone fancy a curry/beers/film tonight, or bike ride tomorrow ‘cos the weather looks decent”.
I also get that some people are more solitary, & I can see that making relocation far easier if that is you.
Maybe in a few years we will tire of our pals….but the thought of heading to a totally new area perhaps a hundred or more miles away and building up a network from scratch would fill me with mild horror right now.
It is probably easiest when you are younger and are more active, although in areas with a large proportion of retirees there are usually lots of more 'age appropriate' facilities, and possibly the infrastructure to cope. Where we are, local GPs/health services etc are well set up for assisting older folks so you can retire somewhere that is rural but setup for an ageing population. It is far easier/quicker to get GP appointments here than it is in even suburban areas. Dentists (NHS) however, do not exist...
Having said all of the above, you don't necessarily move somewhere rural/quiet to make lots of new friends and be constantly out socialising...
I'll be very happy to retire exactly where I am now - in the Wye Valley, South Herefordshire, in the house we have lived for the last 12 years, which is 300m from where I was born and brought up.
A huge network of friends, family and support here. Beautiful scenery, relaxed lifestyle and enough things to do socially.
I find it very comforting to know I don't have to worry about where we want to move to next :-) I am 49 by the way, so a long way to go.....
A huge network of friends, family and support here. Beautiful scenery, relaxed lifestyle and enough things to do socially.
I find it very comforting to know I don't have to worry about where we want to move to next :-) I am 49 by the way, so a long way to go.....
alfabeat said:
I'll be very happy to retire exactly where I am now - in the Wye Valley, South Herefordshire, in the house we have lived for the last 12 years, which is 300m from where I was born and brought up.
A huge network of friends, family and support here. Beautiful scenery, relaxed lifestyle and enough things to do socially.
I find it very comforting to know I don't have to worry about where we want to move to next :-) I am 49 by the way, so a long way to go.....
Sounds like it suits you perfectly. A huge network of friends, family and support here. Beautiful scenery, relaxed lifestyle and enough things to do socially.
I find it very comforting to know I don't have to worry about where we want to move to next :-) I am 49 by the way, so a long way to go.....
For me I need a coast line . Summer riding a mountain bike everywhere is flip flops & shades . Stopping occasionally to take a sea dip
Om said:
Proper friends stay in touch, come visit/stay. Acquaintances come and go, no massive loss. You just make new friends. Once you have moved you need to get out and do things in the local community. Even properly out in the country there are still lots of things to do - clubs, groups, sports etc. Out of necessity people create these things but you do need to want to take part (though you can get by being a hermit if you wish - just don't moan about it).
Good summary.Unlike the poster above who still lives in the same place they were born, some of us moved away quite early on. Not something i regret at all given that i was born and raised near wembly!
But that does mean you dont have a significant local network.
Shnozz said:
JeffreyD said:
I walk and bike significantly more than I did and if we want to "be in the country" we are 5 mins ride from the canal and bridleway that open up miles of walks and rides.
You raise a good point actually on that front. I grew up in the country and my parents still live rurally. They use their car for everything. Perhaps slightly lazy at times, but often born from necessity due to their location. I live in the middle of a city. Not only is everything accessible on foot, using the car is harder work due to traffic and parking. The default is always therefore to walk or cycle. Every day my watch pings to tell me 10k steps have been achieved without fail.
During lockdown I stayed out in the sticks and used the car far more often. I noticed my waistline creeping up and attribute that to the lack of walking a few miles every day.
One thing's for sure; I moved to Edinburgh in 1982 and then London a few years later so have 40 years of city living under my belt. Not once have I ever wanted to live any other way so I'll need access to pavements, shops, bars, cafes and restaurants wherever I end up.
Yantai
https://www.google.com/search?q=yantai&newwind...
You may think I am crazy, but having lived over in China for a good few years, Yantai is amazing.
Weather is amazing, 4 proper seasons,
Food is out of this world.
.
.
.
.
https://www.google.com/search?q=yantai&newwind...
You may think I am crazy, but having lived over in China for a good few years, Yantai is amazing.
Weather is amazing, 4 proper seasons,
Food is out of this world.
.
.
.
.
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