Open plan on deeds..... fence erecting?

[Welshbeef]

garyhun said:

I had a problem neighbour once and it got to the stage of not talking.

Then one day I just went round, knocked on the door and said "I need some help". We ended up sitting down and talking and sorted it all out. Pretty much all the issues were misunderstandings.

There's no winners in a neighbourly battle.

So much this.

Unless he is parking his Porsche in your Mrs garage then nothing can be that bad surely

[Steve Campbell]

Steve Campbell said:

Or the third option which is get on with your life, thanking the neighbour for making a pretty good job of a small fence to the front of his property and freely gravelling your 8" of drive to match the rest of your property. I've read the thread start to finish....and whilst I would have been annoyed at the approach the old git has taken...it actually looks OK from the photo you have posted. Life's too short...move on (but do sort out the back garden fence).

If you get into a tit-for-tat battle, he wins...you will lose in the long run as it will suck all your energy and fun out of life. It will become all you talk about...and ultimately, you'll end up like him.

On the other hand, please keep us updated with your monstrosity of a fence if you decide to build it.

I refer everyone to my previous thread comment and thank OP for keeping me entertained with the updates.

[Vaud]

garyhun said:

I had a problem neighbour once and it got to the stage of not talking.

Then one day I just went round, knocked on the door and said "I need some help". We ended up sitting down and talking and sorted it all out. Pretty much all the issues were misunderstandings.

There's no winners in a neighbourly battle.

^^^ This.

The problem is people don't know how to negotiate as they inevitably focus on the history, perceptions and miss the opportunity to achieve a different outcome through different tactics.

There is nothing (other than some worthless "pride" (and a few pounds) to be lost by buying a good bottle of wine and some flowers , popping round and saying the above plus making a peace offering. In fact it gives you the moral "high ground" if you care about such things. The worst case is he slams the door in your face. Best case is achieve a return to a neighbourly relationship. Mid ground is some tension is defused. Either way you have tried.

Alternatively you could offer to but him lunch down at the local pub if you want to meet on neutral ground and use phrases like "I want to understand the situation better as I may have misunderstood"

Focus on the outcome and tactics to defuse. People are often disarmed by a gift. You can apologise for misunderstanding the situation without actually apologising to him, if that helps your ego, OP. Or say "I'm genuinely sorry that things have got this far, I want to find a way to resolve" which again makes no admission of error on your part.

[dickymint]

Nice fence - achieved anything else?

[cmvtec]

M12MTR said:

So. Thread resurrection...... As my initial post some time ago. This thread is about a bully neighbour "stopping you and your cars" (his words) and hence him destroying my back garden fence (without my permission) and then building several fences to 'hem me in' (I take it he has tried to make me using my cars / garage awkward and restricting the room I have).

Anyhow, summer hols here and I've built my own fence to cover the monstrosity he built - this is on my land and hides his mess (see previous posts).

https://www.instagram.com/p/B0jMd87D1h7/?igshid=1v...

https://www.instagram.com/p/B0jMXywDVqs/?igshid=tf...

OP - I recognise this. Are you in Washington?

[Johnnytheboy]

M12MTR said:

.... my late father always told me to never bow down to bullies.

Then detail my cars.

A wise man indeed.

[CH07]

OP, Just seen this post and thought I'd throw my two pence worth in. You could have planted a hedge at the front and trimmed it like this

https://www.google.com/search?q=bad+neighbour+hedg...

😜😜

[JQ]

CH07 said:

OP, Just seen this post and thought I'd throw my two pence worth in. You could have planted a hedge at the front and trimmed it like this

https://www.google.com/search?q=bad+neighbour+hedg...

????

You joined Pistonheads just to post that? You're his neighbour aren't you?