Neighbourly Issues
Discussion
TheAngryDog said:
fouronthefloor said:
I wouldn't have asked for permission to use his drive in the first place.
It puts him in an awkward position.
He may have said yes in the first place out of courtesy and then thought about it a bit more and decided against it.
There's a fair risk involved. If you invite a lorry on to your drive and it gets damaged, who pays for it? I can tell you it's not the owner of the lorry.
It's bad enough trusting builders not to damage your own property, let alone someone else's.
In my view you've dodged a bullet but potentially ruined a neighbourly relationship, regardless of whether he's an arse.
He had 10 months to say that he had changed his mind. If he didn't want to allow it, he could have told the OP nicely at any point. "on reflection, I'd prefer it if you didn't use our drive for access as I am concerned about the damage that the lorry and its spreaders could do to the driveway". Most people who are reasonable would accept that, I know I would, and I can often be an unreasonable man/dog.It puts him in an awkward position.
He may have said yes in the first place out of courtesy and then thought about it a bit more and decided against it.
There's a fair risk involved. If you invite a lorry on to your drive and it gets damaged, who pays for it? I can tell you it's not the owner of the lorry.
It's bad enough trusting builders not to damage your own property, let alone someone else's.
In my view you've dodged a bullet but potentially ruined a neighbourly relationship, regardless of whether he's an arse.
fouronthefloor said:
TheAngryDog said:
fouronthefloor said:
I wouldn't have asked for permission to use his drive in the first place.
It puts him in an awkward position.
He may have said yes in the first place out of courtesy and then thought about it a bit more and decided against it.
There's a fair risk involved. If you invite a lorry on to your drive and it gets damaged, who pays for it? I can tell you it's not the owner of the lorry.
It's bad enough trusting builders not to damage your own property, let alone someone else's.
In my view you've dodged a bullet but potentially ruined a neighbourly relationship, regardless of whether he's an arse.
He had 10 months to say that he had changed his mind. If he didn't want to allow it, he could have told the OP nicely at any point. "on reflection, I'd prefer it if you didn't use our drive for access as I am concerned about the damage that the lorry and its spreaders could do to the driveway". Most people who are reasonable would accept that, I know I would, and I can often be an unreasonable man/dog.It puts him in an awkward position.
He may have said yes in the first place out of courtesy and then thought about it a bit more and decided against it.
There's a fair risk involved. If you invite a lorry on to your drive and it gets damaged, who pays for it? I can tell you it's not the owner of the lorry.
It's bad enough trusting builders not to damage your own property, let alone someone else's.
In my view you've dodged a bullet but potentially ruined a neighbourly relationship, regardless of whether he's an arse.
What is confrontational about having a friendly chat to say that you've changed your mind? Doing it at the last minute is petty.
The thing to remember is that everyone deals with what life throws at them in different ways. They are influenced by their life experiences and what seems reasonable to some, is unreasonable to others.
This neighbour may or may not have issues but the current trend to shame and stir up hatred seems to have reached every corner of the media. There are far too many people getting wound up over nothing, and let's face it, this is nothing.
People need to start being a bit more tolerant. So what if the neighbour changed his mind - he's entitled to. Move on.
This neighbour may or may not have issues but the current trend to shame and stir up hatred seems to have reached every corner of the media. There are far too many people getting wound up over nothing, and let's face it, this is nothing.
People need to start being a bit more tolerant. So what if the neighbour changed his mind - he's entitled to. Move on.
TheAngryDog said:
595Heaven said:
We bought our house from a couple who were at their wits' end with the neighbour (not that they notified us when selling). We found out once we moved in. We're certainly not close, but we get along fine. No point in inflaming things any more. Shame he'll miss the New Garden party all the other neighbours get invited to though!
Legally the ex owners of your home had to tell you about the dispute. Did you think to follow this up?As it happens, they keep themselves largely to themselves and when we do speak it is all very civil. Eleven years on its not been an issue thankfully! Know friends who have had problem neighbours and it must be horrible.
bennno said:
Said neighbour doesn't want the inconvenience, mess and potential damage to his private drive or car from diggers, materials and waste being moved over it. He'd rather the OP used his drive and side passage.
Op is continuing to have a toys out of the pram, entitled, prattle on IMHO.
I think you’re missing the bit where the neighbour had originally agreed to it before changing his mind at the last minute.Op is continuing to have a toys out of the pram, entitled, prattle on IMHO.
That’s what makes him a prat. I’d throw my toys out the pram too if I was the OP.
595Heaven said:
TheAngryDog said:
595Heaven said:
We bought our house from a couple who were at their wits' end with the neighbour (not that they notified us when selling). We found out once we moved in. We're certainly not close, but we get along fine. No point in inflaming things any more. Shame he'll miss the New Garden party all the other neighbours get invited to though!
Legally the ex owners of your home had to tell you about the dispute. Did you think to follow this up?As it happens, they keep themselves largely to themselves and when we do speak it is all very civil. Eleven years on its not been an issue thankfully! Know friends who have had problem neighbours and it must be horrible.
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