how do you kill a tree?

[blueyes]

rcarr said:

I enjoy driving my Dad's 7 litre Mercedes.

[IRM]

1 are you the tree owner
2 are you in a conservation area
3 are the trees the subject of a tree preservation order
4 copper nails don't work the tree simply compartmentalizes the injury
5 is it a hedge is it causing a nuisance


answers

1 yes then cut it down subject to 2 and 3, no get owner’s permission subject to 2/3
2 yes give six weeks written notice of your intention and await response
3 yes make application via planning portal or using on line form from local council web site or send in a letter

no reasonable application is refused - if it is you can appeal to the secretary of state - consequences of not applying correctly and just cutting it down - 6 months as big als bum mate or up to £20 000

4 through a processes called compartmentalization copper nails will simply be "walled" off - google shigo if you're really interested

5 high hedge crap - details usually listed on council web site or hedgeline only covers certain species

wrong tree wrong place? well it happens but then again ….

It is amazing the number of people who say “well I just didn’t think it would - get that big, so many leaves etc etc shade the house so much “

crap on car - depends on species usually aphid shit - a simple sugar and water based sticky fluid excreted from the aphid’s arse that washes off with a bit of hard work

oh no it isn’t

yes it ing is, as that is all that leaves contain which is where it comes from - the aphid sucks the underside of the leaf and shit it out

structural damage - yes some do but the conditions have to right ie clay soil, shallow founded building, large water pump close by (tree)

more forest than medieval time - whatever




as for the morals of cutting down a healthy tree – that’s up to the tree owner there is information on the net, mainly American about the benefits of trees and the reduction in fuel bills, heat islands, mental benefits, increase in house price values, reduction in surface run off etc but much of it is anecdotal some isn’t

[mybrainhurts]

dp400 said:

HOW DO YOU KILL A TREE?

Edited by mybrainhurts on Monday 19th July 16:57

[Pigeon]

dern said:

Pigeon said:

dern said:

I was going to cut it back last summer but a wood pigeon nested in it so we couldn't (or didn't want to). Now it's way too big for me to attempt so I have to pay 240 quid to get someone to cut it down, remove all the wood and poison the stump... fecking pigeons.

But your actions are much appreciated.

You can thank the wife, I was just loading the air rifle when she stopped me

to Mrs Dern then

[thunderbelmont]

I now read it's a bloody great green evergreen weed.

Call the local HGV recovery firm, say your 44tonne scania has died outside (your address), they send a wrecker, you keep the driver talking with crap about "it started in the end, and he's gone now", while your assistant takes the steel rope from the wrecker's winch and ties it around the tree.

Say your farewells to the driver, wave niceley, then run quickly while he rips the tree out of the ground.

There.

Job done.

Alternatively. climb the great weed, and hide an old redundant sky dish in the top. People will think it's one of those cunning disguise Orange phone masts and campaign for the council to remove it.

And you allowed pigeons to breed in your tree?

Would you allow rats to breed in your loft? No? I didn't think so. Get a 12-bore man. Don't muck about.

Ken wouldn't let me take my decoys into Trafalgar Square.

Edited by thunderbelmont on Tuesday 6th March 22:59

[cyberface]

Nuke it from orbit. It's the only way to be sure.




sorry Towie

[Davi]

IRM said:

3 yes make application via planning portal or using on line form from local council web site or send in a letter

no reasonable application is refused - if it is you can appeal to the secretary of state - consequences of not applying correctly and just cutting it down - 6 months as big als bum mate or up to £20 000

"No reasonable application is refused" - it might be the case where you are, but I can assure you, around these parts its very much "no reasonable application is even considered, it's turned down before we even bother to read the first page of the form"

Edited by Davi on Tuesday 6th March 23:40

[rcarr]

blueyes said:

rcarr said:

I enjoy driving my Dad's 7 litre Mercedes.

How dare you!

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Mercedes

[groomi]

dp400 said:

I have a mature tree right outside my house which is preventing me from using my front garden as a drive. Ive applied to the council to have the tree removed and a dropped kerb put in, but the council have refused as it it against thier policy to remove a mature tree unless it is dead or damaged. If "someone" wanted to, how would you go about killing a tree? Any suggestiond greatfully recieved.

Why do you need to kill the tree. Just buy yourself a Hummer, then park it on you garden regardless.

[central]

[Stu R]

rcarr said:

blueyes said:

rcarr said:

I enjoy driving my Dad's 7 litre Mercedes.

How dare you!

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Mercedes

They both look the same, just your example is red

I like trees, but if it's that big a problem I wouldn't have a problem chopping it, unless it was something really nice and well developed, in which case it'll probably ruin the house anyway lol.
Why not put it to good use when it's down, find somewhere with a wood burning stove, sell them the wood as fuel, I'm sure a lot of local countryside pubs would be grateful for it if you sell it to them cheap, my sisters old pub used to go through firewood like nobody's business and when you buy that much of it it's not cheap

[blueyes]

rcarr said:

blueyes said:

rcarr said:

I enjoy driving my Dad's 7 litre Mercedes.

How dare you!

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Mercedes

I'm really sorry....

I'll correct that straight away...

rcarr said:

I enjoy driving my Dad's 6.8 litre Mercedes.

[King Herald]

rcarr said:

Don't cut it down! It maybe the final straw, floods, famine etc. We need as many trees in this country as possible!

I am not an eco-warrior! I enjoy driving my Dad's 7 litre Mercedes.

Last week I did a sustainability module at uni. If you cut it down, you'll need energy to do it, manually, you will need food to keep your energy levels up, that will create more rubbish. If you do it with a chainsaw etc, you will need petrol and oil etc, that will be yet more CO2 released into that atmosphere. The tree will be more environmentally friendly where it stands now rather than using energy to cut it down!

So driving your car for fun is totally out of the window now then? burning fossil fuels, producing gases and soot, consuming food, wasting precious commodities. Strange you are on a motorists forum at all, rcarr, considering we automobile hooligans are destroying the world as we speak

[thewave]

King Herald said:

Strange you are on a motorists forum at all, rcarr, considering we automobile hooligans are destroying the world as we speak

I turn off the TV properly (not standby) I use the eco setting on my dishwasher, I have masses of insulation in my loft, and cavity wall insulation, a condensing combi-boiler, I recycle my rubbish (through council initiative and own trips) I cycle to work, and am the only person in the office committed to going paperless (thus saving some trees during my lifetime)

And yet here I am on a motorists forum...because I have a car that does 15mpg!

It's all about balance, I feel I need to do something to couteract my excesses, but it's only my personal conscience, each to their own, and I wouldn't moan about anyone who did or didn't chop down a tree.

PS I read somewhere on here about £240 for a tree surgeon We had two V.Large leylandii removed for £100 (taken away too)

It's only a tree, Yorkshire Tea are planting plenty for all of us

[Davi]

thewave said:

PS I read somewhere on here about £240 for a tree surgeon We had two V.Large leylandii removed for £100 (taken away too)

Try £2,985 quoted to remove our oak... If it doesn't get a bit lower I'll be the one in a cherry picker hacking with a chainsaw

[Dainty]

I have an Ash that sheds its lovely little seeds in my garden, take out about 200 and still more follow...... am at wits end, apparently even those that havent seeded this year could seed next year

So looks like salt is my only hope.... better keep those salt mines open.... btw is that table salt, washing salt or sea salt??

[Stuart G Gray]

anonymous said:

[redacted]

Would Von mail his clippings if you asked nicely?

[sleep envy]

Dainty said:

table salt

in buckets of hot water

[RemaL]

anonymous said:

[redacted]

only work if you use enough and depends on the size of the tree.

[JMGS4]

One of the best ways to kil a tree is to bore a small 1/4" hole 3" deep, in a root and fill it with the mould from some green cheese, Rocquefort works best IMHO. Tree dead within around 2-3 months, as they can't seem to fight the bug.... AND INVISIBLE mostly