Stupid things your pets/animals do.
Discussion
We went through a phase where the occasional banana would go missing, funnily enough we'd also only just got a labrador puppy. The thing is, there was no "evidence" of the crime, he was eating the whole thing. We only had it confirmed when one day he walked into the living room and regurgitated half the skin on the carpet in front of us.
Our cat can't work her cat flap. She won't just go through it.
She hits it outwards with her paw again and again, until she's hitting it so hard it swings back at her, and then she tries to hook her paw under it and lift if over her head as she crawls under the flap which is now pointing in.
This is OK for the majority of her body, but it invariably leads to the flap clattering down on her tail and her accelerating out the other side like a proverbial scolded cat.
She hits it outwards with her paw again and again, until she's hitting it so hard it swings back at her, and then she tries to hook her paw under it and lift if over her head as she crawls under the flap which is now pointing in.
This is OK for the majority of her body, but it invariably leads to the flap clattering down on her tail and her accelerating out the other side like a proverbial scolded cat.
My cat was sitting next to me on the sofa earlier when she tightened up, stretched vertically, fell off the bed then started stumbling around on 3 legs. Yet a few minutes later she was back to normal and has been ever since. It properly scared me though as I thought she was having a heart attack or stroke. But looks like I can just chalk it up to stupidity
Our dog loves licking feet, he'll pester Mrs PR until she takes her slippers off. If we're in a pub or something he'll hide under the table, if a flip flopped foot passes by he'll nip out and give the owner a shock. Usually but not exclusively women.
Edited by PositronicRay on Thursday 3rd January 08:41
PositronicRay said:
Our dog loves licking feet, he'll pester Mrs PR until she takes her slippers off. If we're in a pub or something he'll hide under the table, if a flip flopped foot passes by he'll nip out and give the owner a shock. Usually but not exclusively women.
You just have to pray that he doesn't do that when you happen to be picking up a dropped coin or fork. 'honestly, it was the dog!'Edited by PositronicRay on Thursday 3rd January 08:41
Ashtray83 said:
This is Harry cleaning up the loose bits of hay that accidentally get dragged outside of his house he’ll then take this back inside, I think he has ocd! Also we move all his toys into a pile in the corner of the room he will then spend the next half hour putting them all back in the original location bless him 
Harry is gorgeous!!!! I have so many stories about the two bunnies we've had, like the first Christmas BrianBunny (stop sniggering) was given the run of the house, we started finding bits of silver foil from the chocolate Christmas tree decorations on the seat of the sofa which was right up against the tree, we of course blamed each other and of course both denied it, until we came back one day to find him stood on the arm of the sofa with his front paws on a branch trying for the next decoration up which was just out of his reach!!! Or the time he stole a whole slice of toast off of Mrs Bobbers plate, the problem was she was eating beans on toast sat on the sofa at the time and so we ended up with a trail of beans and tomato sauce across the frontroom floor!!!!
Late Thursday evening we hear a thump. Thought it was next-doors putting something in their wheelie bin. Nope.
Friday morning the OH comes down to the dining room (recently decorated just before Christmas, of course) to find a mostly empty glass bottle of tonic water on the floor. Then realises that pretty much every surface, floor, walls, furniture is covered in sticky residue.
Turns out the furry little pillocks have got into the cupboard to go exploring for cat treats, knocked the bottle out of the cupboard 3 ft straight down onto a tiled floor. The bottle must have landed on its metal lid which split (and not smashed the glass), took a chip out of the tile and proceeded to spray most of its contents everywhere.
The room is about 3m*4m and he was mopping up tonic water from right across the room. It is still sticky so I need to deep clean the room today. I am just glad we paneled half way up the wall as it would have completely wrecked the (quite expensive for us) wallpaper we have just put up.
Little b
ds. 
Friday morning the OH comes down to the dining room (recently decorated just before Christmas, of course) to find a mostly empty glass bottle of tonic water on the floor. Then realises that pretty much every surface, floor, walls, furniture is covered in sticky residue.
Turns out the furry little pillocks have got into the cupboard to go exploring for cat treats, knocked the bottle out of the cupboard 3 ft straight down onto a tiled floor. The bottle must have landed on its metal lid which split (and not smashed the glass), took a chip out of the tile and proceeded to spray most of its contents everywhere.
The room is about 3m*4m and he was mopping up tonic water from right across the room. It is still sticky so I need to deep clean the room today. I am just glad we paneled half way up the wall as it would have completely wrecked the (quite expensive for us) wallpaper we have just put up.
Little b
ds. 
Yet more proof, if it ever it were needed, that cats are complete asshats 
BBC art expert reveals rare painting worth thousands of pounds was destroyed by his cat
BBC art expert reveals rare painting worth thousands of pounds was destroyed by his cat
One which has been increasingly making us laugh is that the younger cat (Milly Monkey) gets vocal like you wouldn't believe, when being told off, or removed from a situation - like jumping on the work surface, repeatedly, to try and steal food we're preparing.
The reason for laughing so much about it came to me in recent days. She sounds just like this - https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wTDUuBWGtpU
The reason for laughing so much about it came to me in recent days. She sounds just like this - https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wTDUuBWGtpU
Our Siamese cat throws terrible tantrums when someone uses the shower. She sits in the bathroom doorway screaming, then when that doesn’t work starts cooing then she builds back to screaming again & it then morphs into this terrible gurgling noise. While she is making these noises she also violently throws herself round on the floor & rotates her head 360 deg like something out of the exorcist. It is worthy of filming & putting on YouTube.
She will also only have her yearly vet check consult sat on my shoulders which the vets find very funny. We usually get seen quickly at the vets as she makes such a terrible scene in the waiting room
She will also only have her yearly vet check consult sat on my shoulders which the vets find very funny. We usually get seen quickly at the vets as she makes such a terrible scene in the waiting room
JJ55 said:
Our Siamese cat throws terrible tantrums when someone uses the shower. She sits in the bathroom doorway screaming, then when that doesn’t work starts cooing then she builds back to screaming again & it then morphs into this terrible gurgling noise. While she is making these noises she also violently throws herself round on the floor & rotates her head 360 deg like something out of the exorcist. It is worthy of filming & putting on YouTube.
She will also only have her yearly vet check consult sat on my shoulders which the vets find very funny. We usually get seen quickly at the vets as she makes such a terrible scene in the waiting room
Please, do go grab a shower, and get that filmed! She will also only have her yearly vet check consult sat on my shoulders which the vets find very funny. We usually get seen quickly at the vets as she makes such a terrible scene in the waiting room
On a similar note, the last time we took Monkey to the vets she protested none stop (she hates being put in her box) We were in the waiting room and she was perpetually voicing 'WAAARRS', and every time a cat across the room in a box replied 'MWOOOAR'
It all became a bit of a meow-off, the whole waiting room was in stitches after 5 minutes.
Fermit and Sexy Sarah said:
One which has been increasingly making us laugh is that the younger cat (Milly Monkey) gets vocal like you wouldn't believe, when being told off, or removed from a situation - like jumping on the work surface, repeatedly, to try and steal food we're preparing.
The reason for laughing so much about it came to me in recent days. She sounds just like this - https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wTDUuBWGtpU
The reason for laughing so much about it came to me in recent days. She sounds just like this - https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wTDUuBWGtpU
Excellent. Our fatty Freya does something similar, except she sounds like a a stroppy teenager 'you're not the boss of me...' etc. Miaow miaow miaow miaow miaow, miaow...miaow...grumble ...
Not sure who to start with.
Mick
Use to sleep upside down and snore like a human
Would not like sticks of the ground and would jump up to a branch and hang off it until it snapped. First time we saw this happen (he was a resuce so got him at about 3-4 years old) we thought he was hanging himself by his collar
Fudge
Our house back onto a farmers field, we walk around it 3-4 times a day. Every day he comes home with a stone from the field. He will sniff a few, find the one he likes and carry it all the way around the walk (about 30-40 mins). Some of them are bigger than his head.
Only dog I've seen swim underwater. Will dive to find nice rocks.
Snores like a human, normally can be found asleep like this:
Will jump in the back of any car with its boot open (have to be careful as he is normally very muddy / wet).
We go camping a lot so sometimes leave he car boot open, he will jump in and guard it from any other dog that walks past. He wont get out, ever unless you tell him to. Quite funny to watch.
Murphy (crazy dog).
So many things he does / has done I'm not sure where to start.
Every day is a new thing. Loves to move stuff around the house. You will often find stuff from the kitchen, kitchen sink, kitchen cupboards in the middle of the front room.
Moves the dogs beds around the house
Eats coal / ash / charcoal from the fire
Loves to chase a ball but wont put it down, would rather chase the other dogs chasing balls, with a ball in his mouth
Will jump off anything to get into water and swim
Has eaten 3KG of turkey at xmas a few years back
Has eaten a full box of allbran (you can imagine......)
Has eaten a full tub of quality street (on top of the fridge, not sure how he got it/ knocked it off) on a boxing day night. 3am trip to an emergency vet with all 3 of them as had no idea which one had eaten the sweets
Can open doors / cupboards
Get his tongue stuck on things he is licking (he has a massive tongue). Example he will lick a one of the dogs beds, tongue full length out, bent back under is chin as its stuck to the bed, but will stay like that for 10-15 mins lol
Just before xmas this year we did the normal visit the family stuff, staying at the MIL house and he managed to get 1KG of flour form somewhere, eat some and spread the rest around the house. Him and the other dogs and licked quite a bit so it had turned to paste in areas. Total mess.
Could not get mad it was that funny.
Many many many other things but cant get mad at him, its just funny.
Gambino (beany)
Totally obsessed with balls. Spend all day, all night just dropping them on your knee.
Cries like a girl if someone he knows walks in front of him, almost like he is being murdered. We got lots of funny looks for this
If given the chance will make a bed in our bed/spare bed. He will make a pile of all the pillows then crawl under the cover.
Howls if he cant get outside to play ball with postman / bin men / guys who delivers papers to next door (they all love all 3 and make and effort to spend 5 mins with them).
He is also a rescue so a little quiet but is getting more amusing
Mick
Use to sleep upside down and snore like a human
Would not like sticks of the ground and would jump up to a branch and hang off it until it snapped. First time we saw this happen (he was a resuce so got him at about 3-4 years old) we thought he was hanging himself by his collar
Fudge
Our house back onto a farmers field, we walk around it 3-4 times a day. Every day he comes home with a stone from the field. He will sniff a few, find the one he likes and carry it all the way around the walk (about 30-40 mins). Some of them are bigger than his head.
Only dog I've seen swim underwater. Will dive to find nice rocks.
Snores like a human, normally can be found asleep like this:
Will jump in the back of any car with its boot open (have to be careful as he is normally very muddy / wet).
We go camping a lot so sometimes leave he car boot open, he will jump in and guard it from any other dog that walks past. He wont get out, ever unless you tell him to. Quite funny to watch.
Murphy (crazy dog).
So many things he does / has done I'm not sure where to start.
Every day is a new thing. Loves to move stuff around the house. You will often find stuff from the kitchen, kitchen sink, kitchen cupboards in the middle of the front room.
Moves the dogs beds around the house
Eats coal / ash / charcoal from the fire
Loves to chase a ball but wont put it down, would rather chase the other dogs chasing balls, with a ball in his mouth
Will jump off anything to get into water and swim
Has eaten 3KG of turkey at xmas a few years back
Has eaten a full box of allbran (you can imagine......)
Has eaten a full tub of quality street (on top of the fridge, not sure how he got it/ knocked it off) on a boxing day night. 3am trip to an emergency vet with all 3 of them as had no idea which one had eaten the sweets
Can open doors / cupboards
Get his tongue stuck on things he is licking (he has a massive tongue). Example he will lick a one of the dogs beds, tongue full length out, bent back under is chin as its stuck to the bed, but will stay like that for 10-15 mins lol
Just before xmas this year we did the normal visit the family stuff, staying at the MIL house and he managed to get 1KG of flour form somewhere, eat some and spread the rest around the house. Him and the other dogs and licked quite a bit so it had turned to paste in areas. Total mess.
Could not get mad it was that funny.
Many many many other things but cant get mad at him, its just funny.
Gambino (beany)
Totally obsessed with balls. Spend all day, all night just dropping them on your knee.
Cries like a girl if someone he knows walks in front of him, almost like he is being murdered. We got lots of funny looks for this
If given the chance will make a bed in our bed/spare bed. He will make a pile of all the pillows then crawl under the cover.
Howls if he cant get outside to play ball with postman / bin men / guys who delivers papers to next door (they all love all 3 and make and effort to spend 5 mins with them).
He is also a rescue so a little quiet but is getting more amusing
A few come to mind from our household...
Chester, our current only pet (4 yr male Cockerpoo) is the slickest pickpocket in Northamptonshire. Used tissues are a speciality. I've lost count of the number of times he's been sitting next to me on the sofa, got down, unnoticed & ages later when I've stood up I've noticed a small blizzard by my feet & empty pockets. Bizarre: he doesn't eat it, just shreds it & wanders off. My work here is done, kind of thing...
When it's walk time, he runs ahead of me into the hallway & excitedly knocks over all of the wellies. Every. Day.
Bingo, our recently departed tibetan terrier was a food stealing obsessive (which unfortunately contributed to many health problems over the years)...
1) Having breakfast one morning at friends, after staying the night. We were clearing the dining table, whilst our hosts were in the kitchen, loading up the washer. We entered the dining room to find her slap bang in the middle of the table, just about to clamp her jaws around half a pound of butter.
2) It went suspiciously quiet at a big family party at which point my wife & I looked at each other with the (interchangeable pet/small child) "oh, god, what's she up to?" look. We sneaked around the house, until we noticed a commotion in the bathroom. Bingo shot out, scuttled round my wife, but I grabbed her as she tried to sidestep me on the stairs. Stuck to the side of her head...was a used sanitary towel. The thought of her escaping back into the party still gives me shivers.
3) We once found her INSIDE the dishwasher, giving our crockery a "special pre-rinse"
Pets, eh? Doncha jus luvvem?
CF
Chester, our current only pet (4 yr male Cockerpoo) is the slickest pickpocket in Northamptonshire. Used tissues are a speciality. I've lost count of the number of times he's been sitting next to me on the sofa, got down, unnoticed & ages later when I've stood up I've noticed a small blizzard by my feet & empty pockets. Bizarre: he doesn't eat it, just shreds it & wanders off. My work here is done, kind of thing...
When it's walk time, he runs ahead of me into the hallway & excitedly knocks over all of the wellies. Every. Day.
Bingo, our recently departed tibetan terrier was a food stealing obsessive (which unfortunately contributed to many health problems over the years)...
1) Having breakfast one morning at friends, after staying the night. We were clearing the dining table, whilst our hosts were in the kitchen, loading up the washer. We entered the dining room to find her slap bang in the middle of the table, just about to clamp her jaws around half a pound of butter.
2) It went suspiciously quiet at a big family party at which point my wife & I looked at each other with the (interchangeable pet/small child) "oh, god, what's she up to?" look. We sneaked around the house, until we noticed a commotion in the bathroom. Bingo shot out, scuttled round my wife, but I grabbed her as she tried to sidestep me on the stairs. Stuck to the side of her head...was a used sanitary towel. The thought of her escaping back into the party still gives me shivers.
3) We once found her INSIDE the dishwasher, giving our crockery a "special pre-rinse"
Pets, eh? Doncha jus luvvem?
CF
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