Lies to tell your children

[Justin Cyder]

Sorry love, Santa's not coming this year. Eddie Stobart's undercut him.

[anonymous-user]

The orange in Jaffa Cakes is made from the earwax of the people who work in the Jaffa Cake factory.

[Merlin28]

If you eat apple pips you will turn into a apple tree

It is socially acceptable to point and laugh at fat people but only in your mums presence

The moon is made of cheese

[Justin Cyder]

Mugs are cups that have been to the gym.

[Xtriple129]

Once upon a time, a mate brought me a bundle of 50 cigars in cellophane back from abroad as a pressie and our little girl asked what they were (she was four). I said that they were "poo's" as when children get to five years old they have to be re-loaded!

She believed me right up to her birthday!

[shoehorn]

I tell my 5 y/o daughter that every time she is naughty the wings fall off a butterfly.
Works a treat.