Match.com (Volume 6)

[Gretchen]

CharlesdeGaulle said:

Shore said:

Tell her she should of kept her legs closed and then reject.

fking hell.

My sentiments entirely.

The word you needed was 'have'.

Should have.

[Fermit The Krog and Sexy Sarah]

Noodle1982 said:

Cneci said:

I'm talking to a girl on tinder, seems nice, 25 y/o running her own business.

She just told me she has a child, and if that's an issue then I shouldn't bother.

I'm 27 y/o and have no kids, no real responsibility, and acres of spare time/freedom.

Should I progress things?

No

Another no I'm afraid from me. Been there a few times and it is a big commitment. Add the fact that IF you break up it can be you and the little one who suffer.

[Driver101]

Another no from me. You're young and should experience things in life before getting tied down like that.

I had two relationships where there was already a child from a previous relationship. I vowed I'd never do that again.

[ChocolateFrog]

It would be a no from me too.

CdeG saying don't be one of those men, what exactly are 'those men'

From my point of view I'm not sure I even want children of my own so to half commit to someone with their own children already would likely hurt all parties involved.

Is there a tiny chance I'd be missing out, perhaps but there are millions of women out there and life is complicated enough as it is.

[Condi]

Its a no from me too.


Depends what you want out of life really - Im 28 with no real responsibilities, and a job which will at some point involving moving city, to me a gf with a kid wouldnt work. My ex gf however is dating a guy with 2 kids from 2 different women, and she seems happy with that because at 31 she just wants to settle down and would love a home life. Its quite complicated though.

[JimmyConwayNW]

A child outside wedlock?

At least get a date with her and bump uglies she will be well up for it the little sauce pot.

[Cneci]

Ok, I think the consensus is to steer clear.

The appeal to me is that she could be quite independent, doesn't do much drinking/clubbing (big appeal to me as I don't really like drinking/clubbing), and if she's running a business then could be quite "sorted", financially and emotionally etc.

The negatives are the opportunity cost in terms of time, which I value quite a lot.

I'm assuming an awful lot her though as I haven't even met her yet....

[Shore]

Cneci said:

Ok, I think the consensus is to steer clear.

The appeal to me is that she could be quite independent, doesn't do much drinking/clubbing (big appeal to me as I don't really like drinking/clubbing), and if she's running a business then could be quite "sorted", financially and emotionally etc.

The negatives are the opportunity cost in terms of time, which I value quite a lot.

I'm assuming an awful lot her though as I haven't even met her yet....

Why not date her and another girl too ? That's what's I am doing at the moment and it's going well with both girls. They don't know about each other. I've met both their families but haven't added them on Facebook. They both live in different towns too so I can get away with having two.

[Nuclear Skip]

Shore said:

Why not date her and another girl too ? That's what's I am doing at the moment and it's going well with both girls. They don't know about each other. I've met both their families but haven't added them on Facebook. They both live in different towns too so I can get away with having two.

Playerrrrrr...

[Cneci]

Shore said:

Why not date her and another girl too ? That's what's I am doing at the moment and it's going well with both girls. They don't know about each other. I've met both their families but haven't added them on Facebook. They both live in different towns too so I can get away with having two.

Guess that's an option.

Fortunately I haven't taken your first piece of advice

[ChocolateFrog]

Nuclear Skip said:

Shore said:

Why not date her and another girl too ? That's what's I am doing at the moment and it's going well with both girls. They don't know about each other. I've met both their families but haven't added them on Facebook. They both live in different towns too so I can get away with having two.

Playerrrrrr...

One at a time tends to be more than expensive enough.

[gregs656]

Cneci said:

Ok, I think the consensus is to steer clear.

To be fair the consensus shouldn't matter too much. The fact you asked the question suggests you don't have a strong reaction either way, if the other signs are good why not see how it plays out?

[CaptainSlow]

Just go on the date and give the girl a chance, I doubt she'll be bringing the adoption papers along with her.

[bazza white]

Single mum and own business/self employed usualy = forever living type business.

[mjb1]

Just go on a date with her, it's not like she'll bring the sprog with her. You'll know after the first date if you like her enough to take things further, then it's decision time. Suss out whether she's looking for a new father figure for her child, or if she just wants a new partner to start with. The kid's father might still be an active parent, so she could have several child free nights per week, in reality how often do you want to be out doing 'couply' stuff? If she's independent as a single mother, she probably isn't dating to find a bloke that'll be a cheap babysitter for her.

[Ki3r]

mjb1 said:

Just go on a date with her, it's not like she'll bring the sprog with her. You'll know after the first date if you like her enough to take things further, then it's decision time. Suss out whether she's looking for a new father figure for her child, or if she just wants a new partner to start with. The kid's father might still be an active parent, so she could have several child free nights per week, in reality how often do you want to be out doing 'couply' stuff? If she's independent as a single mother, she probably isn't dating to find a bloke that'll be a cheap babysitter for her.

You joke about her not bringing the kid on a date...ive had someone turn up with their nine month old daughter on the first date...i also had someone introduce me to her son for the first time (he woke up when I was around) as 'your new daddy'.

That being said I've been on dates with others with kids since. Just be prepared there will be another bloke in their life.

Had a date last night with a women from work...still not sure how it came around...went from texting about work to going for a drink on a date.

Went well though and going for a meal Tuesday evening.

[Blown2CV]

Cneci said:

I'm talking to a girl on tinder, seems nice, 25 y/o running her own business.

She just told me she has a child, and if that's an issue then I shouldn't bother.

I'm 27 y/o and have no kids, no real responsibility, and acres of spare time/freedom.

Should I progress things?

if it's an issue for you then you shouldn't bother... however if you don't know what you think yet, then i'd suggest you bail out. There is no need at the age of 27 to settle for someone with kids. Having been a step parent previously it is an utter nightmare and can ruin your life.

Edited by Blown2CV on Sunday 24th September 21:15

[lord trumpton]

Cneci said:

I can't give a direct answer really, "perhaps" I'd be ok with it, I'm not sure.

My uncertainty is due to naivety. I don't know what caring for a child entails.

I suspect my world is more quiet than hers!

No leave it.

Edited by soc.mod on Sunday 1st October 09:35

[cootuk]

FFs just ask her for a date. She could be your soulmate and yet you're not even willing to give anything a chance.
If you don't like it, then move on.

[Condi]

Ki3r said:

You joke about her not bringing the kid on a date...ive had someone turn up with their nine month old daughter on the first date...i also had someone introduce me to her son for the first time (he woke up when I was around) as 'your new daddy'.

Im not sure your dating experience is very typical though...



Just go on the date, might be a nice evening out if nowt else.