Do you let work take over family sometimes?
Poll: Do you let work take over family sometimes?
Total Members Polled: 155
Discussion
Steamer said:
KrazyIvan said:
Nobody ever lay on their death bed wishing they had spent more time at work.
I think thats cobblers (no pun)Depends on how much you love doing your job.
My dad is 65 and has built up and run his own company for 40 years and I can tell he is genuinely terrified of retirement. He loves his work and the thrill of business.
He has never worked for anyone else.
I guess you could say he spent a lot of time at work when me and my brother were growing up, but I certainly don't begrudge it, and the lifestyle our family now has due to his sheer hard work is of quite a standard.
So if you enjoy your job and your family support it, go nuts.
I'm 23 currently on University placement some I'm being paid pittance (Granted I'm lucky to be getting paid). So I currently work for placement company, a car auction in the evening two nights a week, a local farm at weekends and occasionally take leave from placement and have a weekend off to go and work for my old boss 180 miles away to keep him sweet. So I have a job to go back to after I've finished placement and get back to Uni (He does cover me fuel + wage when I go back).
I also don't have dependant family or spouse, but I don't see to much of my parents, grandparents, etc which I'd normally say is a good thing but having had 3 of them hospital since I started placement in sept. I have managed to travel the 500 mile round trip to see them in hospital even if 2 of them didn't know I was there.
So surprisingly I 'Voted' for the first one. I have completely got the work life balance wrong.
I also don't have dependant family or spouse, but I don't see to much of my parents, grandparents, etc which I'd normally say is a good thing but having had 3 of them hospital since I started placement in sept. I have managed to travel the 500 mile round trip to see them in hospital even if 2 of them didn't know I was there.
So surprisingly I 'Voted' for the first one. I have completely got the work life balance wrong.
I'm lucky in many ways. I work 10 weeks on 10 weeks off. When I am at work it takes priority, but when I am at home my family time is complete and uninterrupted. Never a call to come in to the office on a Saturday morning, never working late in the evenings or stuck in traffic on the way home. Of course the ten weeks away can be tough, but it sure helps to keep work/home life apart.
Work rarely interferes with family. I do travel a bit and I'm lucky to have an understanding partner. My sons mother is also great with being flexible when I have to be away.
In terms of hours, unless there's a tight deadline or a major issue, I leave on time. If you constantly HAVE to stay back then you need a time management course or your position requires more resource. If you choose to stay back, you need more friends and hobbies! This picture is spot on in my opinion:
In terms of hours, unless there's a tight deadline or a major issue, I leave on time. If you constantly HAVE to stay back then you need a time management course or your position requires more resource. If you choose to stay back, you need more friends and hobbies! This picture is spot on in my opinion:
At the moment yes. But thankfully I don't have any commitments as such. I'm single and family are happy to support me with my career.
I did perhaps let work get in the way of my last relationship, and my ex didn't like it. However I also did take ten days unpaid off when she needed me, so swings and roundabouts really.
I did perhaps let work get in the way of my last relationship, and my ex didn't like it. However I also did take ten days unpaid off when she needed me, so swings and roundabouts really.
el stovey said:
NinjaPower said:
My dad is 65 and has built up and run his own company for 40 years and I can tell he is genuinely terrified of retirement. He loves his work and the thrill of business.
Doesn't he have any other interests or things he'd enjoy doing in retirement? 
He does like classic cars and he used to be into photography before he got busy with work, so maybe he'll pick that up again.
For me 'it depends' (I'm not a lawyer). We have just moved house and my wife will soon stop work while baby number 2 arrives. She will go back to work when number 1 is in school in 3 years time. My wife is very understanding and knows without a job we lose the house (a bit extreme I know) so for the next 3 years, work comes first. Yes, I will still try to be be home just before bathtime as I enjoy spending time with the family but if work needs me, I will work. I also travel a little with work but this can be suited to fit the family diary 90% of the time.
Nope.
I enjoy my job and I like the company that I work for. My salary, whilst not particularly outstanding, is acceptable; it allows me to enjoy a decent enough quality of life at the moment. At work, the atmosphere is generally pretty laid-back but I work hard to achieve what I need/want to during the day. I would also consider myself pretty good at my job.
9.9 times out of 10 I'm out of the door at 16:30 and work doesn't cross my mind until the following morning.
I enjoy my job and I like the company that I work for. My salary, whilst not particularly outstanding, is acceptable; it allows me to enjoy a decent enough quality of life at the moment. At work, the atmosphere is generally pretty laid-back but I work hard to achieve what I need/want to during the day. I would also consider myself pretty good at my job.
9.9 times out of 10 I'm out of the door at 16:30 and work doesn't cross my mind until the following morning.
I leave the house at 7am, and am usually home 7:15pm.
I class this as normal, and its Mon-Fri.
Although I wish I could spend more time with my 16 month old son, I can not complain and think I have it easy compared to some people.
Do I think I put work ahead of my family?
Nope, its got to be done. I have cut back on my personal things since he was born: karting on week days, gym after work hours, most socialising etc.
I class this as normal, and its Mon-Fri.
Although I wish I could spend more time with my 16 month old son, I can not complain and think I have it easy compared to some people.
Do I think I put work ahead of my family?
Nope, its got to be done. I have cut back on my personal things since he was born: karting on week days, gym after work hours, most socialising etc.
Henry Fiddleton said:
I leave the house at 7am, and am usually home 7:15pm.
I class this as normal, and its Mon-Fri.
Although I wish I could spend more time with my 16 month old son, I can not complain and think I have it easy compared to some people.
Do I think I put work ahead of my family?
Nope, its got to be done. I have cut back on my personal things since he was born: karting on week days, gym after work hours, most socialising etc.
That was normal for me several years ago. leave at 7am, get home around 7pm. Work life balance means you should be able to work, go to the gym if you want and still get to spend quality time with family and friends. I found I was coming home, putting the bairn to sleep having tea and getting nothing done as I was so tired I watched TV and went to bed. I couldn't enjoy my "me" time. I class this as normal, and its Mon-Fri.
Although I wish I could spend more time with my 16 month old son, I can not complain and think I have it easy compared to some people.
Do I think I put work ahead of my family?
Nope, its got to be done. I have cut back on my personal things since he was born: karting on week days, gym after work hours, most socialising etc.
Now if I'm not in the house by 5pm then something has gone wrong at work and my evening is not my own.
I've had a job where I was sent out to the US for weeks at a time, often being asked to stay out there for an extra week to sort something out. 9 weeks straight was my record. This was while trying to hold down a relationship in the UK, a house sale and sick pets. The relationship went sour, the house sold for less than I was hoping for (I lost interest as out of sight out of mind) and I was homesick.
The thing is, when people ask and you say 'I'm headed out to California for a month' they think it's amazing. They dont often think about the 12 hour flight, the timezone sleep fairies that get you up at 4am, the eating alone in the restaurant surrounded by other lone reps, the bit where you mostly see airport/hotel/airport and live out of a suitcase. It's not that glamorous. I quit that with nothing to go to, as it was completely destroying me
I couldnt do a job now that involves being away from home for more than 2 nights. I'm not interested in a 14 hour day, a long commute is a no-go too. I'd rather take less money and have more time for what I do outside of work.
My company gets its pound of flesh from me, I do a good day's work for a good day's pay and I'm happy enough with that. I used to be a really materialistic t
t about things, but I've mellowed and worked out that none of that is really important to me.
In the case of the OP, I'd probably have declined it, but sounds like it's all worked out for the best anyway after the update.
The thing is, when people ask and you say 'I'm headed out to California for a month' they think it's amazing. They dont often think about the 12 hour flight, the timezone sleep fairies that get you up at 4am, the eating alone in the restaurant surrounded by other lone reps, the bit where you mostly see airport/hotel/airport and live out of a suitcase. It's not that glamorous. I quit that with nothing to go to, as it was completely destroying me
I couldnt do a job now that involves being away from home for more than 2 nights. I'm not interested in a 14 hour day, a long commute is a no-go too. I'd rather take less money and have more time for what I do outside of work.
My company gets its pound of flesh from me, I do a good day's work for a good day's pay and I'm happy enough with that. I used to be a really materialistic t
t about things, but I've mellowed and worked out that none of that is really important to me. In the case of the OP, I'd probably have declined it, but sounds like it's all worked out for the best anyway after the update.
Edited by andy-xr on Friday 21st November 09:02
el stovey said:
Henry Fiddleton said:
I leave the house at 7am, and am usually home 7:15pm.
I class this as normal, and its Mon-Fri.
How on earth is that normal? Look at how much time you spend at work. You spend almost no time with your family at all.I class this as normal, and its Mon-Fri.
I used to. Hugely.
However, for me the question is what is the importance of each. For example, when my OH got very ill (rushed into hospital ill and touch and go), I told my boss I was going - he told me I would need to do this that and the other, and I told him if he wants to sack me go ahead but I was out the door as soon as I'd shut down the computer.
If it was a wedding to attend that would be missed, then work will come second.
However, if it is something like just wanting to go out to dinner or somesuch, something that can easily be rearranged, then if work is important it will come first.
However, for me the question is what is the importance of each. For example, when my OH got very ill (rushed into hospital ill and touch and go), I told my boss I was going - he told me I would need to do this that and the other, and I told him if he wants to sack me go ahead but I was out the door as soon as I'd shut down the computer.
If it was a wedding to attend that would be missed, then work will come second.
However, if it is something like just wanting to go out to dinner or somesuch, something that can easily be rearranged, then if work is important it will come first.
Family will come first, mostly. I have a wife and young kids.
I have a good job that lets me work from home as much as I want so I normally take the kids to school in the morning (8am) and the wife picks them up again. We both need to do overnights or late starts/early finishes on occasion and we manage those between us. I send my early start appointments to the Mrs and she sends me her late finishes.
It's rare that we will need to cancel anything outside work as we manage it pretty well between us that said if I was needed somewhere for work and that clashed with family commitments then it would depend on what each of those commitments were.
I think it's a case of judging each situation on its merits. Sometime you just need to get on with it.
I have a good job that lets me work from home as much as I want so I normally take the kids to school in the morning (8am) and the wife picks them up again. We both need to do overnights or late starts/early finishes on occasion and we manage those between us. I send my early start appointments to the Mrs and she sends me her late finishes.
It's rare that we will need to cancel anything outside work as we manage it pretty well between us that said if I was needed somewhere for work and that clashed with family commitments then it would depend on what each of those commitments were.
I think it's a case of judging each situation on its merits. Sometime you just need to get on with it.
el stovey said:
Henry Fiddleton said:
I leave the house at 7am, and am usually home 7:15pm.
I class this as normal, and its Mon-Fri.
How on earth is that normal? Look at how much time you spend at work. You spend almost no time with your family at all.I class this as normal, and its Mon-Fri.
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