Classic from the Mrs! Vol 2
Discussion
Dying of suspected man flu last week, was lay in bed glowing hot but shivering and felt cold.
I complained that my feet were cold so she says "put them on your chest, that's red hot"
"Pardon?"
"Put your feet on your chest 'cos that's boiling"
"Think about what you've just said"
"Why can't you?"
"No! Can you?"
"Err *fidgets* oh yeah... no"
I complained that my feet were cold so she says "put them on your chest, that's red hot"
"Pardon?"
"Put your feet on your chest 'cos that's boiling"
"Think about what you've just said"
"Why can't you?"
"No! Can you?"
"Err *fidgets* oh yeah... no"
addz86 said:
Dying of suspected man flu last week, was lay in bed glowing hot but shivering and felt cold.
I complained that my feet were cold so she says "put them on your chest, that's red hot"
"Pardon?"
"Put your feet on your chest 'cos that's boiling"
"Think about what you've just said"
"Why can't you?"
"No! Can you?"
"Err *fidgets* oh yeah... no"
You should have asked if you could put your feet on her chest.I complained that my feet were cold so she says "put them on your chest, that's red hot"
"Pardon?"
"Put your feet on your chest 'cos that's boiling"
"Think about what you've just said"
"Why can't you?"
"No! Can you?"
"Err *fidgets* oh yeah... no"
ChemicalChaos said:
Bought my mum some of these for Christmas to put in her whisky
They are hollow plastic with distilled water inside, that you put in the freezer to use without diluting your drink.
She tried them today, and came to me disappointed. Apparently, she was expecting them to stand up on the bottom of the glass rather than float on the surface of the drink.....
Float? Does she drink pints of whisky? They are hollow plastic with distilled water inside, that you put in the freezer to use without diluting your drink.
She tried them today, and came to me disappointed. Apparently, she was expecting them to stand up on the bottom of the glass rather than float on the surface of the drink.....
Jimmy Recard said:
ChemicalChaos said:
Bought my mum some of these for Christmas to put in her whisky
They are hollow plastic with distilled water inside, that you put in the freezer to use without diluting your drink.
She tried them today, and came to me disappointed. Apparently, she was expecting them to stand up on the bottom of the glass rather than float on the surface of the drink.....
Float? Does she drink pints of whisky? They are hollow plastic with distilled water inside, that you put in the freezer to use without diluting your drink.
She tried them today, and came to me disappointed. Apparently, she was expecting them to stand up on the bottom of the glass rather than float on the surface of the drink.....
Not my Mrs this time but one of my mates'.
I was in the local supermarket and picked up a tin of 'Branston' brand baked beans. One of my mates' wife happened to be passing and commented, 'Eugh! how can you eat pickle flavoured beans? We only have the tomato flavoured ones.'
I didn't have the heart to tell her it was just a brand name. I just said,' Oh, it's an acquired taste'
I was in the local supermarket and picked up a tin of 'Branston' brand baked beans. One of my mates' wife happened to be passing and commented, 'Eugh! how can you eat pickle flavoured beans? We only have the tomato flavoured ones.'
I didn't have the heart to tell her it was just a brand name. I just said,' Oh, it's an acquired taste'
Shakermaker said:
FidoGoRetroGo said:
Could the real physicists on here confirm that there is no true "Zero G" environment anywhere in the universe. My understanding is that all mass exhibits gravitational effects on all other mass, though of course infinitessimally small for small mass and vast distance.
Correct. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4aCMDQsx740
was moving a sofa to ours in the back of a van, we used an old decorating dust sheet to protect it.
my dad said to me, don't mess the sheet up, it has sentimental value to my sister in law as her dad (painter) had owned it, sadly now deceased.
when my mrs was folding it up, i told her what my dad had said,
her: sentimental value? did they bury him in it then?
me and future son in law : hahahahahahaha
her: if you put that in that thread you're dead meat!!!
luckily she isn't on here, scarily her daughter takes after her, very clever, just not quite all together
my dad said to me, don't mess the sheet up, it has sentimental value to my sister in law as her dad (painter) had owned it, sadly now deceased.
when my mrs was folding it up, i told her what my dad had said,
her: sentimental value? did they bury him in it then?
me and future son in law : hahahahahahaha
her: if you put that in that thread you're dead meat!!!
luckily she isn't on here, scarily her daughter takes after her, very clever, just not quite all together
havoc said:
Or you could be at a point which is equi-gravitant* in all directions.
* made-up word, but hopefully you understand - all of the gravitational forces perfectly cancel each other out. (In simplest terms, there are only two masses affecting you, and you are directly between them, but you are 4x as close to the one that is half as massive)
I already mentioned examples of such point in my original post (i.e Lagrangian points)* made-up word, but hopefully you understand - all of the gravitational forces perfectly cancel each other out. (In simplest terms, there are only two masses affecting you, and you are directly between them, but you are 4x as close to the one that is half as massive)
Wife and I sometimes watch quiz shows, and often see who can get the most right. No penalties for wrong answers, so this leads to some wild guesses. So, using that as an excuse, The Chase....
Bradley Walsh: Prague Airport is named after which famous Czech playwright?
Wife: John Prague.
Bradley Walsh: Prague Airport is named after which famous Czech playwright?
Wife: John Prague.
Nimby said:
Just posted by Tom Scott - may be of interest (free fall, not literally zero G):
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4aCMDQsx740
Nice. Love the counter-intuitive ascent bit.https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4aCMDQsx740
FidoGoRetroGo said:
Nimby said:
Just posted by Tom Scott - may be of interest (free fall, not literally zero G):
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4aCMDQsx740
Nice. Love the counter-intuitive ascent bit.https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4aCMDQsx740
ChemicalChaos said:
Bought my mum some of these for Christmas to put in her whisky
They are hollow plastic with distilled water inside, that you put in the freezer to use without diluting your drink.
She tried them today, and came to me disappointed. Apparently, she was expecting them to stand up on the bottom of the glass rather than float on the surface of the drink.....
That's a real classic from your mrs. They are hollow plastic with distilled water inside, that you put in the freezer to use without diluting your drink.
She tried them today, and came to me disappointed. Apparently, she was expecting them to stand up on the bottom of the glass rather than float on the surface of the drink.....
It's a bit weird about how you talk about your house, cars and now Mother as if they're things that are yours rather than your father's.
klmhcp said:
ChemicalChaos said:
Bought my mum some of these for Christmas to put in her whisky
They are hollow plastic with distilled water inside, that you put in the freezer to use without diluting your drink.
She tried them today, and came to me disappointed. Apparently, she was expecting them to stand up on the bottom of the glass rather than float on the surface of the drink.....
That's a real classic from your mrs. They are hollow plastic with distilled water inside, that you put in the freezer to use without diluting your drink.
She tried them today, and came to me disappointed. Apparently, she was expecting them to stand up on the bottom of the glass rather than float on the surface of the drink.....
It's a bit weird about how you talk about your house, cars and now Mother as if they're things that are yours rather than your father's.
https://www.google.co.uk/amp/www.dailymail.co.uk/n...
sc0tt said:
klmhcp said:
ChemicalChaos said:
Bought my mum some of these for Christmas to put in her whisky
They are hollow plastic with distilled water inside, that you put in the freezer to use without diluting your drink.
She tried them today, and came to me disappointed. Apparently, she was expecting them to stand up on the bottom of the glass rather than float on the surface of the drink.....
That's a real classic from your mrs. They are hollow plastic with distilled water inside, that you put in the freezer to use without diluting your drink.
She tried them today, and came to me disappointed. Apparently, she was expecting them to stand up on the bottom of the glass rather than float on the surface of the drink.....
It's a bit weird about how you talk about your house, cars and now Mother as if they're things that are yours rather than your father's.
https://www.google.co.uk/amp/www.dailymail.co.uk/n...
I'm not sure he takes it that far. I just think once the parents have gone out for the a while, he just dresses up as his dad and wonders around the house,and PH, pretending to be him. 'Which lawnmower do I need?' He might ask, 'look at what my silly missus said, lucky she got a decent rack on her' he might follow up with. Pretty disturbing stuff on the whole.
klmhcp said:
sc0tt said:
klmhcp said:
ChemicalChaos said:
Bought my mum some of these for Christmas to put in her whisky
They are hollow plastic with distilled water inside, that you put in the freezer to use without diluting your drink.
She tried them today, and came to me disappointed. Apparently, she was expecting them to stand up on the bottom of the glass rather than float on the surface of the drink.....
That's a real classic from your mrs. They are hollow plastic with distilled water inside, that you put in the freezer to use without diluting your drink.
She tried them today, and came to me disappointed. Apparently, she was expecting them to stand up on the bottom of the glass rather than float on the surface of the drink.....
It's a bit weird about how you talk about your house, cars and now Mother as if they're things that are yours rather than your father's.
https://www.google.co.uk/amp/www.dailymail.co.uk/n...
I'm not sure he takes it that far. I just think once the parents have gone out for the a while, he just dresses up as his dad and wonders around the house,and PH, pretending to be him. 'Which lawnmower do I need?' He might ask, 'look at what my silly missus said, lucky she got a decent rack on her' he might follow up with. Pretty disturbing stuff on the whole.
Asked my missus an aritmetic question set for eight year olds.
Susie goes to the beach and buys a swimsuit and sunglasses that cost a total of £110, the swimsuit costs £100 more than the sunglasses, how much did the sunglasses cost?
Her response was that it was a trick question because you should not be wearing £10 sunglasses with a £100 swimsuit and anyway it should be in euros because no one would wear a good swimsuit to an english beach.
Just wrong on so many levels.
Susie goes to the beach and buys a swimsuit and sunglasses that cost a total of £110, the swimsuit costs £100 more than the sunglasses, how much did the sunglasses cost?
Her response was that it was a trick question because you should not be wearing £10 sunglasses with a £100 swimsuit and anyway it should be in euros because no one would wear a good swimsuit to an english beach.
Just wrong on so many levels.
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