Classic from the Mrs! Vol 2
Discussion
Virgin Media recently sent through an upgraded box to replace the one attached to my TV in the dining area. Unfortunately, the new box is a bit fatter than the old one, so it doesn't fit underneath the TV. It's now sat on its side behind the TV. To give it any commands you have to lean back slightly in your chair and aim the remote towards the side of the TV.
I had a buddy from work over a week or two ago for a few beers and it took him about 10 minutes to get used to figuring out the remote controls.
Another friend of mine who stays over somewhat regularly has spent roughly three weeks with this fantastic new idea of having to lean back to change the TV channel. Yet every few days she still complains that the remote batteries must be dying. I now just respond "lean back a bit" [phrasing] and she marvels every time how the remote magically works again.
I had a buddy from work over a week or two ago for a few beers and it took him about 10 minutes to get used to figuring out the remote controls.
Another friend of mine who stays over somewhat regularly has spent roughly three weeks with this fantastic new idea of having to lean back to change the TV channel. Yet every few days she still complains that the remote batteries must be dying. I now just respond "lean back a bit" [phrasing] and she marvels every time how the remote magically works again.
CanAm said:
(Not my missus but some poor sod's). I just ordered a skinny latte in an ASDA café (I know, I know)....
Waitress, "Is that with red milk or green milk?"
I assume she is referring to the colour of the cap on the milk. Which would be red for skimmed. Red milk or green milk may be an odd way to ask but its easy to grasp what she ment.Waitress, "Is that with red milk or green milk?"
Cotty said:
I assume she is referring to the colour of the cap on the milk. Which would be red for skimmed. Red milk or green milk may be an odd way to ask but its easy to grasp what she ment.
As they only have 'red and green milk' it was more the fact that I'd ordered a skinny latte. Middle class problem, I know.......CanAm said:
Cotty said:
I assume she is referring to the colour of the cap on the milk. Which would be red for skimmed. Red milk or green milk may be an odd way to ask but its easy to grasp what she ment.
As they only have 'red and green milk' it was more the fact that I'd ordered a skinny latte. Middle class problem, I know.......Not Manhattan, London or Paris. Not Starbucks or Costa.
Not Asda.
SpeckledJim said:
There is no location at all where it is possible to use that phrase without looking a divvy.
Not Manhattan, London or Paris. Not Starbucks or Costa.
Not Asda.
I know. Especially in ASDA. But it's a sight easier to ask for that than "A latte with fully skimmed milk please".Not Manhattan, London or Paris. Not Starbucks or Costa.
Not Asda.
At least I didn't say "Can I get a skinny latte", nor ask for extra shots of dollop. My usual caff has just two choices - tea or coffee. That's it - take it or leave it.
Actually with the benefit of hindsight I should have just said "latte with red milk". I'll know better should I be forced to go there again.
Edited by CanAm on Friday 19th May 18:04
CanAm said:
SpeckledJim said:
There is no location at all where it is possible to use that phrase without looking a divvy.
Not Manhattan, London or Paris. Not Starbucks or Costa.
Not Asda.
I know. Especially in ASDA. But it's a sight easier to ask for that than "A latte with fully skimmed milk please".Not Manhattan, London or Paris. Not Starbucks or Costa.
Not Asda.
At least I didn't say "Can I get a skinny latte", nor ask for extra shots of dollop. My usual caff has just two choices - tea or coffee. That's it - take it or leave it.
Actually with the benefit of hindsight I should have just said "latte with red milk". I'll know better should I be forced to go there again.
Edited by CanAm on Friday 19th May 18:04
Shakermaker said:
When we were in the car this morning, the traffic report comes on
Traffic report
"A lane is blocked on the M1 northbound because of a broken down lorry..."
Wife
"How do they know she's called Elaine? You don't get many women lorry drivers maybe that's how..."
Is she a comedian by trade? Top marks go to her for that cracker. Traffic report
"A lane is blocked on the M1 northbound because of a broken down lorry..."
Wife
"How do they know she's called Elaine? You don't get many women lorry drivers maybe that's how..."
Not the mrs but a foreign woman serving me in a cafe
I couldn't make my mind up what I wanted, got to the front and ordered, when she put it in front of me I just stared at it , what's that, it's what you ordered, OK but what is it, it was a hot dog with 2 lumps on the top of it
she said, it's a hot dog with tuna , WTF I must've meant to order a jacket potato with tuna, who would dish that up without questioning it
I couldn't make my mind up what I wanted, got to the front and ordered, when she put it in front of me I just stared at it , what's that, it's what you ordered, OK but what is it, it was a hot dog with 2 lumps on the top of it
she said, it's a hot dog with tuna , WTF I must've meant to order a jacket potato with tuna, who would dish that up without questioning it
wack said:
Not the mrs but a foreign woman serving me in a cafe
I couldn't make my mind up what I wanted, got to the front and ordered, when she put it in front of me I just stared at it , what's that, it's what you ordered, OK but what is it, it was a hot dog with 2 lumps on the top of it
she said, it's a hot dog with tuna , WTF I must've meant to order a jacket potato with tuna, who would dish that up without questioning it
That really says more about you than her.I couldn't make my mind up what I wanted, got to the front and ordered, when she put it in front of me I just stared at it , what's that, it's what you ordered, OK but what is it, it was a hot dog with 2 lumps on the top of it
she said, it's a hot dog with tuna , WTF I must've meant to order a jacket potato with tuna, who would dish that up without questioning it
wack said:
Not the mrs but a foreign woman serving me in a cafe
I couldn't make my mind up what I wanted, got to the front and ordered, when she put it in front of me I just stared at it , what's that, it's what you ordered, OK but what is it, it was a hot dog with 2 lumps on the top of it
she said, it's a hot dog with tuna , WTF I must've meant to order a jacket potato with tuna, who would dish that up without questioning it
hot dog.... [mumble mumble] *whispering* no, potato* [mumble mumble] with tunaI couldn't make my mind up what I wanted, got to the front and ordered, when she put it in front of me I just stared at it , what's that, it's what you ordered, OK but what is it, it was a hot dog with 2 lumps on the top of it
she said, it's a hot dog with tuna , WTF I must've meant to order a jacket potato with tuna, who would dish that up without questioning it
?
Have a plaque similar to this on our house has been there for years, have tried explains it to the missus but to no avail she has no idea why it's funny even resulting in her putting it on fb and questioning her mates with a 90% return of them not understanding either.
She's just admitted that delivery drivers and postmen regularly comment that it's funny and she blindly plays along even tho she still doesn't understand.
Blown2CV said:
wack said:
Not the mrs but a foreign woman serving me in a cafe
I couldn't make my mind up what I wanted, got to the front and ordered, when she put it in front of me I just stared at it , what's that, it's what you ordered, OK but what is it, it was a hot dog with 2 lumps on the top of it
she said, it's a hot dog with tuna , WTF I must've meant to order a jacket potato with tuna, who would dish that up without questioning it
hot dog.... [mumble mumble] *whispering* no, potato* [mumble mumble] with tunaI couldn't make my mind up what I wanted, got to the front and ordered, when she put it in front of me I just stared at it , what's that, it's what you ordered, OK but what is it, it was a hot dog with 2 lumps on the top of it
she said, it's a hot dog with tuna , WTF I must've meant to order a jacket potato with tuna, who would dish that up without questioning it
?
She probably didn't hear the comma.
briangriffin said:
Have a plaque similar to this on our house has been there for years, have tried explains it to the missus but to no avail she has no idea why it's funny even resulting in her putting it on fb and questioning her mates with a 90% return of them not understanding either.
She's just admitted that delivery drivers and postmen regularly comment that it's funny and she blindly plays along even tho she still doesn't understand.
Probably. If you want to be sure you could consult Dr Dan Streetmentioner...
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