Classic from the Mrs! Vol 2
Discussion
One of the wifes friends came to visit on Friday. After she had left, there was a knock on the door around 10 minutes after. It was the wifes friend...
Her - somethings wrong with my car, it's got a yellow light on the dashboard.
Me - What's the light look like?
Her - Its a picture of a flat tyre
Me - Have you checked your tyres?
Her - Yes, ones flat
Me - You've got a flat tyre
Her - somethings wrong with my car, it's got a yellow light on the dashboard.
Me - What's the light look like?
Her - Its a picture of a flat tyre
Me - Have you checked your tyres?
Her - Yes, ones flat
Me - You've got a flat tyre
bobtail4x4 said:
this is after me telling her for months not to roll the wire up.
Yep - same with my wife and the hoover.The times when she's hovering that she goes over something that jams up the rotating brush head - and you hear the grinding/ratchet noise. Rather than immediately turning off the hoover and unjamming it by hand - she leave it running and tries to yank the hoover back to unjam whatever it is (despite the roller working against her).
I have told her load of times not to do this - to unjam it by hand, but she won't listen. Lo and behold - what happened yesterday - the brush head jammed again, but this time finally gave up the ghost.
bobtail4x4 said:
Its 9.30 pm, seems her laptop charger wont work,
this is after me telling her for months not to roll the wire up.
changed the fuse just in case, still not working, apparently its my fault..........
Why did you do this, now it is even more your fault! (yes, it was most certainly your fault before, but if you touch it after it has broken, you get more blame!)this is after me telling her for months not to roll the wire up.
changed the fuse just in case, still not working, apparently its my fault..........
Moonhawk said:
bobtail4x4 said:
this is after me telling her for months not to roll the wire up.
Yep - same with my wife and the hoover.The times when she's hovering that she goes over something that jams up the rotating brush head - and you hear the grinding/ratchet noise. Rather than immediately turning off the hoover and unjamming it by hand - she leave it running and tries to yank the hoover back to unjam whatever it is (despite the roller working against her).
I have told her load of times not to do this - to unjam it by hand, but she won't listen. Lo and behold - what happened yesterday - the brush head jammed again, but this time finally gave up the ghost.
Bobberoo99 said:
... the way they bang a knife on the edge of a saucepan ...
Tell me about it. Every time she made a cake or similar, my mother would bash the spoon on the rim of the mixing bowl, quite hard, despite the fact that there was a huge crack all the way down it.(I was always waiting for it to break in half but, Sod's Law, it never did. I might still have it somewhere.)
Bobberoo99 said:
Mainly it's down to females not being mechanically sympathetic, watch how they treat a car whilst driving, the way they bang a knife on the edge of a saucepan, the way they use the hoover even when it's full, ect, ect, ect!!!!
My wife and her friend putting the fairly large Christmas tree on a glass top coffee table. Ended up with a pole of broken glass on the carpet and the tree's bucket had a little fence round it!Cotty said:
bobtail4x4 said:
Its 9.30 pm, seems her laptop charger wont work,
this is after me telling her for months not to roll the wire up.
changed the fuse just in case, still not working, apparently its my fault..........
Why does she feel it has to be anyone's fault. this is after me telling her for months not to roll the wire up.
changed the fuse just in case, still not working, apparently its my fault..........
HTP99 said:
Not really a "classic from the mrs", well not at all, just wanted a moan.
We are out tonight for a surprise birthday meal with 20 people, at a restaurant and we pay for ourselves.
I and everyone else will be fine with an even split of the bill, however the wife always has this issue when there is a big group that we may underpay or someone else will over pay.
So she will say something along the lines of "well Alex had 5 beers and I think everyone else had 3 so I don't think it is fair that someone subsidises the extra beers so we'll pay for those", always failing to neglect that most may have had a dessert (I don't do desserts), someone who had 3 beers also had a brandy and an expensive main and the token big drinker women had copious cocktails and bottles of wine.
it drives me bloody mad, I know she means well but it just complicates everything and it all comes out in the wash anyway.
now THIS is hilarious. Classic!We are out tonight for a surprise birthday meal with 20 people, at a restaurant and we pay for ourselves.
I and everyone else will be fine with an even split of the bill, however the wife always has this issue when there is a big group that we may underpay or someone else will over pay.
So she will say something along the lines of "well Alex had 5 beers and I think everyone else had 3 so I don't think it is fair that someone subsidises the extra beers so we'll pay for those", always failing to neglect that most may have had a dessert (I don't do desserts), someone who had 3 beers also had a brandy and an expensive main and the token big drinker women had copious cocktails and bottles of wine.
it drives me bloody mad, I know she means well but it just complicates everything and it all comes out in the wash anyway.
Watching the new Who Wants To Be A Millionaire programme this week.
A young woman, late twenties I guess, possibly thirty, a teacher of English, from County Down, Northern Ireland was in the chair.
In one of the early, allegedly easier questions that lead up to the initial £1000, she was asked,
An old joke that has now become boring, is A) an old chestnut, B) a Brazil nut, C) a peanut, D) a walnut, or some other nut, I can’t remember now.
Anyway, amazingly she didn’t know the answer, and used a lifeline, I think that it was “Ask the audience.”
Naturally a large percentage opted for A) Old Chestnut, so she went with it.
I said to my wife, “f
king hell, she’s a teacher of English? That’s unbelievable!”
First off my wife said, “Give her a break, she’s only young, she may not have heard of it!”
As if that wasn’t a piss poor enough excuse, she went on, “AND she’s from Northern Ireland, they probably have different sayings over there!”
I had to lay down in a darkened room.
A young woman, late twenties I guess, possibly thirty, a teacher of English, from County Down, Northern Ireland was in the chair.
In one of the early, allegedly easier questions that lead up to the initial £1000, she was asked,
An old joke that has now become boring, is A) an old chestnut, B) a Brazil nut, C) a peanut, D) a walnut, or some other nut, I can’t remember now.
Anyway, amazingly she didn’t know the answer, and used a lifeline, I think that it was “Ask the audience.”
Naturally a large percentage opted for A) Old Chestnut, so she went with it.
I said to my wife, “f
king hell, she’s a teacher of English? That’s unbelievable!”First off my wife said, “Give her a break, she’s only young, she may not have heard of it!”
As if that wasn’t a piss poor enough excuse, she went on, “AND she’s from Northern Ireland, they probably have different sayings over there!”
I had to lay down in a darkened room.
Frank7 said:
Watching the new Who Wants To Be A Millionaire programme this week.
A young woman, late twenties I guess, possibly thirty, a teacher of English, from County Down, Northern Ireland was in the chair.
In one of the early, allegedly easier questions that lead up to the initial £1000, she was asked,
An old joke that has now become boring, is A) an old chestnut, B) a Brazil nut, C) a peanut, D) a walnut, or some other nut, I can’t remember now.
Anyway, amazingly she didn’t know the answer, and used a lifeline, I think that it was “Ask the audience.”
Naturally a large percentage opted for A) Old Chestnut, so she went with it.
I said to my wife, “fking hell, she’s a teacher of English? That’s unbelievable!”
First off my wife said, “Give her a break, she’s only young, she may not have heard of it!”
As if that wasn’t a piss poor enough excuse, she went on, “AND she’s from Northern Ireland, they probably have different sayings over there!”
I had to lay down in a darkened room.
I saw that, same contestant, had never heard of Donna Tart tha Pulitzer -rise winning novelist who has sold an]bout eleventy billion books. A young woman, late twenties I guess, possibly thirty, a teacher of English, from County Down, Northern Ireland was in the chair.
In one of the early, allegedly easier questions that lead up to the initial £1000, she was asked,
An old joke that has now become boring, is A) an old chestnut, B) a Brazil nut, C) a peanut, D) a walnut, or some other nut, I can’t remember now.
Anyway, amazingly she didn’t know the answer, and used a lifeline, I think that it was “Ask the audience.”
Naturally a large percentage opted for A) Old Chestnut, so she went with it.
I said to my wife, “f
king hell, she’s a teacher of English? That’s unbelievable!”First off my wife said, “Give her a break, she’s only young, she may not have heard of it!”
As if that wasn’t a piss poor enough excuse, she went on, “AND she’s from Northern Ireland, they probably have different sayings over there!”
I had to lay down in a darkened room.
An English teacher? It was a bit odd.
Sometimes the most basic knowledge can pass you by. I like to think my general knowledge is pretty good, and I answer loads of questions on Millionaire, University challenge and the general knowledge section of Mastermind. But there was a question for £500 on Millionaire a few years back, about the official colour of the UN. I had no idea it was light blue. My kids who were teenagers then looked at me as if I was crazy, saying "how could you not know that!!!"
Gargamel said:
I saw that, same contestant, had never heard of Donna Tartt the Pulitzer -prize winning novelist who has sold about eleventy billion books.
An English teacher? It was a bit odd.
I'd never heard of her either, and there are some among my acquaintances who consider me erudite.An English teacher? It was a bit odd.
TwigtheWonderkid said:
Sometimes the most basic knowledge can pass you by. I like to think my general knowledge is pretty good, and I answer loads of questions on Millionaire, University challenge and the general knowledge section of Mastermind. But there was a question for £500 on Millionaire a few years back, about the official colour of the UN. I had no idea it was light blue. My kids who were teenagers then looked at me as if I was crazy, saying "how could you not know that!!!"
There was a chap on hear a while back that freaked out over a gif of an elephant on a road - he'd got to adulthood without seeing or knowing what an elephant was. Was so weird but I guess it can happen.Mothersruin said:
TwigtheWonderkid said:
Sometimes the most basic knowledge can pass you by. I like to think my general knowledge is pretty good, and I answer loads of questions on Millionaire, University challenge and the general knowledge section of Mastermind. But there was a question for £500 on Millionaire a few years back, about the official colour of the UN. I had no idea it was light blue. My kids who were teenagers then looked at me as if I was crazy, saying "how could you not know that!!!"
There was a chap on hear a while back that freaked out over a gif of an elephant on a road - he'd got to adulthood without seeing or knowing what an elephant was. Was so weird but I guess it can happen.HTP99 said:
Mothersruin said:
There was a chap on hear a while back that freaked out over a gif of an elephant on a road - he'd got to adulthood without seeing or knowing what an elephant was. Was so weird but I guess it can happen.
Really, are you sure?Mothersruin said:
HTP99 said:
Mothersruin said:
There was a chap on hear a while back that freaked out over a gif of an elephant on a road - he'd got to adulthood without seeing or knowing what an elephant was. Was so weird but I guess it can happen.
Really, are you sure?Gassing Station | The Lounge | Top of Page | What's New | My Stuff