Classic from the Mrs! Vol 2

[boyse7en]

CanAm said:

Older cars were a bit tougher. I once hit one in my Omega at 'about' 60mph; it dislodged the cover over the tow hook.

You managed to reverse into a Pigeon at 60mph???

[ChrisNic]

boyse7en said:

You managed to reverse into a Pigeon at 60mph???

Errr, worthy of its own entry into the thread?

[CanAm]

ChrisNic said:

said:

You managed to reverse into a Pigeon at 60mph???

Errr, worthy of its own entry into the thread?

Thank you ChrisNic.

boyse7en, go back to the original post. Firstly, it wasn't a pigeon, it was a peasant phartridge PHEASANT. Sadly, the damage to said Pheasant wasn't as easily repaired. In actual fact he is now an ex-pheasant.

Secondly, I didn't say towbar, I said tow hook. If you go to the FRONT of your car, you will probably find a removable plastic flap in the bumper. Behind this is a hook, or a threaded socket into which one can be inserted.

HTH

[Usget]

He's not the pheasant plucker, he's the pheasant plucker's son...

[PositronicRay]

CanAm said:

ChrisNic said:

said:

You managed to reverse into a Pigeon at 60mph???

Errr, worthy of its own entry into the thread?

Thank you ChrisNic.

boyse7en, go back to the original post. Firstly, it wasn't a pigeon, it was a peasant phartridge PHEASANT. Sadly, the damage to said Pheasant wasn't as easily repaired. In actual fact he is now an ex-pheasant.

Secondly, I didn't say towbar, I said tow hook. If you go to the FRONT of your car, you will probably find a removable plastic flap in the bumper. Behind this is a hook, or a threaded socket into which one can be inserted.

HTH

Eye

[Gandahar]

When your wife phones up and leaves a voicemail

"The front of the car has fallen off ... do you know the RAC number?"

"The road was a bit bumpy"

Er, so the Astra estate in Essex on a cottage weekend seems to have been driven like this

https://youtu.be/NHIUv7Q3QYI?t=160

They are using duct tape to keep it all together. Must have used the backup car to go down to Halfords to get it.....

My only comment, in reply via text, was ;-

"You didn't get the cheap duct tape did you, it's rubbish"

I wonder what the front of the car means, is it all the way back to the magic air freshener hanging from the indicator stalk?

We will see.

[slipstream 1985]

Gandahar said:

When your wife phones up and leaves a voicemail

"The front of the car has fallen off ... do you know the RAC number?"

"The road was a bit bumpy"

Er, so the Astra estate in Essex on a cottage weekend seems to have been driven like this

https://youtu.be/NHIUv7Q3QYI?t=160

They are using duct tape to keep it all together. Must have used the backup car to go down to Halfords to get it.....

My only comment, in reply via text, was ;-

"You didn't get the cheap duct tape did you, it's rubbish"

I wonder what the front of the car means, is it all the way back to the magic air freshener hanging from the indicator stalk?

We will see.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3m5qxZm_JqM

[Saddle bum]

"I don't care about Brexit, so long as it doesn't interfere with Emmerdale".

[PositronicRay]

Saddle bum said:

"I don't care about Brexit, so long as it doesn't interfere with Emmerdale".

Farming subsidises?

[Smitters]

Mrs: That's the B's and E's.

Me: You what?

Mrs: The B's and E's - you know, really good.

Me: ...

Me: The bee's knees.

Mrs: Eh?

Me: The bee's knees. For the pollen and the collecting and the flowers. The bee's knees are really good.

Mrs: Not the B's and E's then?

Wouldn't change her for the world mind.

[RammyMP]

Smitters said:

Mrs: That's the B's and E's.

Me: You what?

Mrs: The B's and E's - you know, really good.

Me: ...

Me: The bee's knees.

Mrs: Eh?

Me: The bee's knees. For the pollen and the collecting and the flowers. The bee's knees are really good.

Mrs: Not the B's and E's then?

Wouldn't change her for the world mind.

That reminds me of one of the wife’s, “Jesus wet!” I’m going to ask her one day why is he wet.

[Evangelion]

I had a girlfriend who used to come out with some odd turns of phrase like that.

One of the more memorable ones being, "I've had enough as I can take."

[antspants]

My ex used to mispronounce words, my favourites "spaghetti carbonharbora" and even after repeated corrections (probably why we're no longer together) the year 2000 was still the "minellium".

[Oldandslow]

Watching "Unbreakable" where Bruce Willis's character exhibits super powers of, well, being unbreakable and psychically reading peoples crimes and intentions.

At the end there's short paragraphs on screen that give a summary of what happened to the characters afterwards.

She pipes up "Was that based on a true story?"

[Blown2CV]

antspants said:

My ex used to mispronounce words, my favourites "spaghetti carbonharbora" and even after repeated corrections (probably why we're no longer together) the year 2000 was still the "minellium".

that's like a borderline disorder i think.

[NickGibbs]

Smitters said:

Mrs: That's the B's and E's.

Me: You what?

Mrs: The B's and E's - you know, really good.

Me: ...

Me: The bee's knees.

Mrs: Eh?

Me: The bee's knees. For the pollen and the collecting and the flowers. The bee's knees are really good.

Mrs: Not the B's and E's then?

Wouldn't change her for the world mind.

This reckons she's right

http://www.future-perfect.co.uk/grammar-tip/what-i...

"After years of use, ‘the be-all and [the] end-all’ became shortened to: the Bs and Es (the be-all and end-all), the Bs being the things which are all and the Es being those things which end all."

[Speed 3]

NickGibbs said:

Smitters said:

Mrs: That's the B's and E's.

Me: You what?

Mrs: The B's and E's - you know, really good.

Me: ...

Me: The bee's knees.

Mrs: Eh?

Me: The bee's knees. For the pollen and the collecting and the flowers. The bee's knees are really good.

Mrs: Not the B's and E's then?

Wouldn't change her for the world mind.

This reckons she's right

http://www.future-perfect.co.uk/grammar-tip/what-i...

"After years of use, ‘the be-all and [the] end-all’ became shortened to: the Bs and Es (the be-all and end-all), the Bs being the things which are all and the Es being those things which end all."

Looks like Smitters now has "face in egg"

[Usget]

Haha! Smitters, we want a transcript of what happens when you apologise to Mrs Smitters...

[8bit]

antspants said:

My ex used to mispronounce words, my favourites "spaghetti carbonharbora" and even after repeated corrections (probably why we're no longer together) the year 2000 was still the "minellium".

My Mrs. does that with some words - "supposably", for example...

[Alfa numeric]

This morning I decided to empty the dishwasher whilst waiting for the kettle to boil. At the end I was left with a pyrex bowl without a home (things got moved when our toddler daughter worked out how to open the cupboards) so I left it on the side. When the OH came down I asked her where I should have put it.

Her: With the baking stuff.
Me: Where's the baking stuff?
Her: Where it's always been.
Me: And where exactly is that?
Her: *points In there, under the cooker.


I'm not sure why the last sentence couldn't have been said first, but there you go...