Classic from the Mrs! Vol 2
Discussion
After having been asked by SWMBO to drive to Ikea to pick something up, I did this. I also picked up a catalogue as a good idea to prevent ever having to do more than just go there and pick something up and leave.
Handed it - catalogue with IKEA in large letters on the front to the Mrs - 'Have you got one of these?' says I.
Says she: 'No, I don't think so. Where did you get it?'
Handed it - catalogue with IKEA in large letters on the front to the Mrs - 'Have you got one of these?' says I.
Says she: 'No, I don't think so. Where did you get it?'
thismonkeyhere said:
After having been asked by SWMBO to drive to Ikea to pick something up, I did this. I also picked up a catalogue as a good idea to prevent ever having to do more than just go there and pick something up and leave.
Handed it - catalogue with IKEA in large letters on the front to the Mrs - 'Have you got one of these?' says I.
Says she: 'No, I don't think so. Where did you get it?'
I like that Handed it - catalogue with IKEA in large letters on the front to the Mrs - 'Have you got one of these?' says I.
Says she: 'No, I don't think so. Where did you get it?'
crows said:
MrsCrows - "Didn't he used to play for England?"
"Who?"
"John Barnes"
"Gendarmes, honey, GENDARMES!"
"Who?"
"John Barnes"
"Gendarmes, honey, GENDARMES!"
The odd thing here is, even if she misheard and thought they said John Barnes, why on Earth would French special forces call in the ex Watford, Liverpool & England maestro to help?
Bizarre!!!
Text conversation with the wife this morning:
Her: Where the hell is my medium yellow pyrex dish. I always put it back with my other dishes but it's not there. So you must've used it last and put it back in the wrong place. It's so annoying. I wish you'd put stuff back where you got it. I've got better things to do with my life than play hunt the pyrex dish you've put back in a stupid place.
Me: Didn't you cook last nights dinner in it? Wasn't there was some left over that you kept in the dish and put in the fridge.
Her: Possibly!
Her: Where the hell is my medium yellow pyrex dish. I always put it back with my other dishes but it's not there. So you must've used it last and put it back in the wrong place. It's so annoying. I wish you'd put stuff back where you got it. I've got better things to do with my life than play hunt the pyrex dish you've put back in a stupid place.
Me: Didn't you cook last nights dinner in it? Wasn't there was some left over that you kept in the dish and put in the fridge.
Her: Possibly!
TwigtheWonderkid said:
Text conversation with the wife this morning:
Her: Where the hell is my medium yellow pyrex dish. I always put it back with my other dishes but it's not there. So you must've used it last and put it back in the wrong place. It's so annoying. I wish you'd put stuff back where you got it. I've got better things to do with my life than find pyrex dishes you've put back in a stupid place.
Me: Didn't you cook last nights dinner in it? Wasn't there was some left over that you kept in the dish and put in the fridge.
Her: Possibly!
If my wife sent me a text like that I'd put her in the blender Her: Where the hell is my medium yellow pyrex dish. I always put it back with my other dishes but it's not there. So you must've used it last and put it back in the wrong place. It's so annoying. I wish you'd put stuff back where you got it. I've got better things to do with my life than find pyrex dishes you've put back in a stupid place.
Me: Didn't you cook last nights dinner in it? Wasn't there was some left over that you kept in the dish and put in the fridge.
Her: Possibly!
TwigtheWonderkid said:
crows said:
MrsCrows - "Didn't he used to play for England?"
"Who?"
"John Barnes"
"Gendarmes, honey, GENDARMES!"
"Who?"
"John Barnes"
"Gendarmes, honey, GENDARMES!"
The odd thing here is, even if she misheard and thought they said John Barnes, why on Earth would French special forces call in the ex Watford, Liverpool & England maestro to help?
Bizarre!!!
TwigtheWonderkid said:
crows said:
MrsCrows - "Didn't he used to play for England?"
"Who?"
"John Barnes"
"Gendarmes, honey, GENDARMES!"
"Who?"
"John Barnes"
"Gendarmes, honey, GENDARMES!"
The odd thing here is, even if she misheard and thought they said John Barnes, why on Earth would French special forces call in the ex Watford, Liverpool & England maestro to help?
Bizarre!!!
TwigtheWonderkid said:
Her: Where the hell is my medium yellow pyrex dish. I always put it back with my other dishes but it's not there. So you must've used it last and put it back in the wrong place. It's so annoying. I wish you'd put stuff back where you got it. I've got better things to do with my life than play hunt the pyrex dish you've put back in a stupid place.
She sounds super! You lucky chap...Ari said:
TwigtheWonderkid said:
Her: Where the hell is my medium yellow pyrex dish. I always put it back with my other dishes but it's not there. So you must've used it last and put it back in the wrong place. It's so annoying. I wish you'd put stuff back where you got it. I've got better things to do with my life than play hunt the pyrex dish you've put back in a stupid place.
She sounds super! You lucky chap...28th wedding anniversary this year. (she reckons she broke 4 mirrors on her wedding day).
TwigtheWonderkid said:
Ari said:
TwigtheWonderkid said:
Her: Where the hell is my medium yellow pyrex dish. I always put it back with my other dishes but it's not there. So you must've used it last and put it back in the wrong place. It's so annoying. I wish you'd put stuff back where you got it. I've got better things to do with my life than play hunt the pyrex dish you've put back in a stupid place.
She sounds super! You lucky chap...28th wedding anniversary this year. (she reckons she broke 4 mirrors on her wedding day).
Made myself scrambled eggs for lunch today and later on Mrs 2CV comes stomping into the room to tell me that i've messed up the numbers by having 3 eggs, and that if she now has 2 eggs there will only be 1 left. Can't fault the arithmetic, however she just looked utterly blank when i told her that 6 and 12 (standard box sizes) divide by both 3 and 2, so i could equally say that she's messed up the numbers. So, it was still my fault.
Why do they insist on pointing out the bleeding obvious all the time in such a way that it sounds like they're impressed by pointing it out
Conversation last night with the girlfriend:
Me: Hmm I quite fancy a new challenge, maybe a new job in a completely different sector
Her: Well the only way you can do that is by applying for other jobs....
Me: Yep, thanks for that little nugget of knowledge love.
Conversation last night with the girlfriend:
Me: Hmm I quite fancy a new challenge, maybe a new job in a completely different sector
Her: Well the only way you can do that is by applying for other jobs....
Me: Yep, thanks for that little nugget of knowledge love.
DeuxCentCinq said:
V8mate said:
Nokia Drive is the best satnav I've ever used. And, as you say, it's free. And that camera is ace! (if that helps?)
Is that available on all new Nokias?R8VXF said:
DeuxCentCinq said:
V8mate said:
Nokia Drive is the best satnav I've ever used. And, as you say, it's free. And that camera is ace! (if that helps?)
Is that available on all new Nokias?https://play.google.com/store/apps/details?id=com....
Thankfully not my Mrs. Sadly probably someone's.
I was getting a haircut and the hair dresser says:
"I get a ringing in my ears whenever the hairdryers on, I think I have a touch of that tittyitus"
It was hard to hold my smile in.
Then a lady with 2 kids walked in, asked the girl on the desk for a hair cut for her kids.
She replied "it's £10.95 each"
Woman replied "so how much is that all together?"
At this point my eyebrow raised in disbelief.
Desk woman "Erm, I'm not sure"
She looks at the girl cutting my hair, my eyebrow is even higher at this point.
My hairdresser "I have no idea, there's a calculator in the back"
Desk girl heads to the back muttering "I'm sure it's £21.80 something"
After doing this hard maths on the calculator she informs the mother it's £21.90, at this point she says that's too much and leaves.
How could she not get it at least in the ballpark in her own head! Unless £21 would have been fine but £22 too much so wanted to know an exact figure :/
I was getting a haircut and the hair dresser says:
"I get a ringing in my ears whenever the hairdryers on, I think I have a touch of that tittyitus"
It was hard to hold my smile in.
Then a lady with 2 kids walked in, asked the girl on the desk for a hair cut for her kids.
She replied "it's £10.95 each"
Woman replied "so how much is that all together?"
At this point my eyebrow raised in disbelief.
Desk woman "Erm, I'm not sure"
She looks at the girl cutting my hair, my eyebrow is even higher at this point.
My hairdresser "I have no idea, there's a calculator in the back"
Desk girl heads to the back muttering "I'm sure it's £21.80 something"
After doing this hard maths on the calculator she informs the mother it's £21.90, at this point she says that's too much and leaves.
How could she not get it at least in the ballpark in her own head! Unless £21 would have been fine but £22 too much so wanted to know an exact figure :/
Edited by Zoobeef on Saturday 17th January 18:34
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